Perplexed
by Iruka Lover
Summary: Iruka always perplexed Kakashi. The chuunin would do things no other chuunin would even try to do to Kakashi and any other jounin for that matter. Just why was Iruka so bold? Kakashi is sure to find out! YAOI! Kakairu later chapters. Currently on HIATUS but will be updated sometime soon, and hopefully completed within the year 2015.
1. Of Bipolar Chuunin and Idiotic Jounin

**A/N:** YOSH! I'm back with my second story already! And this one I promise will be a treat! It's a… CHAPTER STORY! That's right! Chapter! As in more than one! Enough of that… So yes, I planned this story already out to chapter 6, and should have another update sometime within the week of this one! I hope… I'm just going to warn all of you now; I MAY BE HORRIBLE WITH UPDATING! It's not my fault, really! I have school which sucks away most of my free time. But I promise I will try and update this somewhat quickly! It's the least I could do for all my precious reviewers! (*cough cough hint hint*) So yeah. This starts out humorous, but will get very angsty, very soon! Oh no! I forgot to mention I'm an angst whore… Sorry. ^_^|||

So, onto the story!

**Warnings:** MalexMale romance/love (in the future), _possible_ X-rated smex in future chapters, possible OOC-ness, intense kill yourself angst (maybe). So if you don't like any of this (though I think you can handle the angst if I promise it will be cute and romantic—eventually.) then DON'T READ! PRESS THAT BACK BUTTON RIGHT NOW! Flames will be used to burn Edward and Bella. :3

**Disclaimer:** I doubt I'd be writing about the stupidity of jounin and chuunin if I OWNED this. TT-TT

**PICTURE DISCLAIMER: **_THIS IMAGE IS NOT MINE! I SIMPLY FOUND IT ON GOOGLE AND LOVED IT! If this offends or angers the creator of this picture, I FULLY apologize. I have not found who created this picture, so credits to the author(s?) for making an amazing picture. I apologize if this angers you._

"Maaa, Iuka-sensei, what a cute blush you have." A silver-haired jounin said to the embarrassed and flushing churning.

"K-kakashi-san! What are you doing saying such things?" The appalled chuunin replied. Kakashi's eyes narrowed; now being serious. "It's weak." He said with a hint of coldness to his voice.

The chuunin sputtered, in disbelief at this… this… _child!_ He replied equally coldly. "Just give me your mission report, Kakashi-_sama_ ." He emphasized the honorific as an insult and letting the jounin know he was aware of his servile position.

Kakashi's gaze hardened as he fished out his mission report. "Iruka-sensei, why are you so open with your emotions? You know you are a shinobi." He said coolly. By now the mission room was stuffed to the brim with jounin, chuunin, and even a few civilians. The great copy-nin was actually instigating the well-mannered man! Those that knew Iruka smirked, knowing a great _show_ was going to commence at this rate. Kakashi himself didn't mean anything by the teasing, Iruka was just so emotional he couldn't help but tease reactions out of the man.

Iruka's gaze hardened and instantly some chuunin took a step back. This was looking very, very, _very, _bad.

"Kakashi-sensei, I understand my duties and I'm sorry if I do not satisfy the requirements or beliefs you have about how a shinobi should act." The chuunin said in an extremely polite tone.

Some of the chuunin at the academy grabbed the civilians and already ran out of the mission room as if fleeing the Kyuubi herself. They knew exactly where this was heading, and didn't want to be in a ten-mile radius of the village. The other jounin only looked at them in confusion certain the kind chuunin wasn't a threat in any way, shape, size, or form. They were a room of jounin and chuunin for pete's sake! Oh how they were so wrong…

"No need to apologize to me, sensei. I know you are never going to be strong. I find it fitting you are in the mission room and teach children." Kakashi replied evenly, happy that Iruka was so polite and understood his shortcomings. Raidou stared openly at Kakashi in an _'Oh. God. He__** didn't**_…_'_ way. Iruka's forehead vein popped out and he smiled. Oh god, he _smiled_. The smart chuunin jutsued away hoping to save their lives. Everyone else was doomed.

"YOU POMPOUS, INGRATEFUL, COCKSURE BASTARD-JOUNIN!" Iruka yelled at the top of his lungs. Somewhere out in the far reaches of the Fire Nation, Naruto sneezed and coulda' sworn he heard an explosion he liked to dub the "Iruka-explosion". But he shrugged and continued eating his ramen, wishing mercy on the souls of those that were in range…

It all happened so fast. Suddenly all of the jounin in the mission room practically ran out screaming like little girls while dodging extremely well-aimed kunai and some of the remaining chuunin crawled out on their hands and knees while others could only drag themselves with one arm as their legs and the other arm were pierced with kunai. Other unfortunate or poorly-skilled jounin found themselves running out in rather torn and revealing articles of clothing, while jutsu smoke wafted out of the building from the other smart ninja recognizing danger. There was dead silence… Then…

"Thank you, have a nice day Kakashi." The chuunin said to Kakashi. The poor man was at the epicenter of the destruction and he found that his uniform was in tatters, his body pinned to the ground by kunai, and all of his weapons gone, _and_ was wrapped and trapped in chakra wire. Kakashi was at a loss; what just happened was physically impossible for the chuunin and in such an amount of time! He could only logically explain it as Iruka having gods working for him or something… Based on this destruction he could only assume that Iruka had to be in ANBU or _something_. He actually was scared a bit, because he didn't see this happening or even coming at all. But, he supposed Iruka was still somewhat merciful as he felt his mask was still securely in place. The chuunin simply calmly and politely walked out leaving a struck and shocked Kakashi to fend for himself with no jutsu, and no weapons. He sighed and could only contemplate the gravity of what just happened, as someone had to come and save him.

Tsunade arrived only one minute after the "Iruka-explosion".

"BRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT," she paused taking in a breath "WHAT IN KAMI'S NAME IS GOING ON HERE?" she roared. Kakashi only shrugged as best he could and gave his one-eyed smile. "I think I teased Iruka-sensei a bit too much today." He said cheerily. Tsunade's eye twitched.

Kakashi was still rubbing his arms from the sheer brutal handling his "doctor" gave him. She quite simply ripped the jounin off the ground from the kunai stuck in his body as she stomped all the way to her office cursing and swearing about stupid jounin and insane chuunin. He was finally sitting down after being healed quickly.

"I'm sorry?" he tried with his smile. The sooner he got home the better… He had to think about what happened, and just _how_ the seemingly bi-polar chuunin did that. To him too, nonetheless! The Godaime glared back at him.

"Tell me, brat. Why the hell, or what the hell did you do to Iruka?" She sighed and rubbed her forehead the Elders were going to get her. They probably are pissed Iruka harmed his fellow teammates like a traitor to the village… She groaned even louder needing her sake. And _bad._

"I teased him and told him he was weak and I found it quite fitting he taught children and worked the mission's desk." The jounin said with his smile still firmly in place. The Godaime stared at him openly; mouth agape like he was the biggest idiot she ever met in the world.

"You did _what?"_ she roared again.

"I told you, I-"

"I KNOW WHAT YOU SAID!" she yelled at him, then continued rubbing her forehead.

"Tell me, are you an idiot? No, actually, you are. Obviously. No one in their right mind would dare insult Iruka's strength, and not to mention jobs!" she chastised the copy-nin angrily. He only shrugged seeming unfazed by the situation.

"I shoulda' left you there to bleed…" The hokage mumbled and fished out her 'emergency only' sake bottle.

"So cruel hokage… What would the village do without the great copy ninja?" Kakashi replied with a smirk. Tsunade's eye only twitched and she growled dangerously. She was fairly certain Kakashi had a death wish. Why else would he tease the chuunin so badly?

"Get out!" she yelled at him. He only poofed away with his smile, satisfied his plan was a success. The hokage, in turn, laid her head on the table now certain a migraine was coming on.

A/N: Oh! That was so very fun to write! Remember, constructive criticism and reviews are welcomed openly and with wide, loving arms. They are also rewarded cookies! Yay! So, tell me what you think and I'll get back another chapter ASAP! Yay! What? No, I'm not shamelessly bribing you to review. Pshaw! *Review this story button glows a bright green as he hums innocently*. I may also be convinced to make this more humorous if my readers want such a treat! But there will still be a boatload of angst. Just less. But remember, no funnies for you if you nu review!

Until next time, and with much love,

Ja ne! Ciao!

~I.L.


	2. Of Curious Jounin and Aggravated Chuunin

**A/N:** YOSH! Here I am with chapter TWO _already!_ So exciting! See the power your reviews hold over me? So yes… this will likely be the last humorous chapter if that. Cuz' this one is mostly serious/general. But, we'll see ne? I also have decided this is set one year after Naruto leaves. (Meaning one and a half years left before Naruto comes back for the shonen time-line.) Well…, with that, I do hope you enjoy!

**Disclaimer:** No. I don't own Naruto, Kakashi, Iruka, or anything else for that matter. TT_TT  
>I do however own two dolphin plushies. :heart:<p>

**Warnings:** Yaoi! Eventually… Angst! (Soon.) Possible OOC-ness, (Though I'm informed not _too_ bad.) and other nonsensical things. Don't like? Why are you even on chapter 2? -.-' I request that you kindly press that back button. Flames will be used to fuel my pyromania, and for candles in sweet love scenes. :heart: :D

Without further ado…

On we go!

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The whispers were all around the village. The completely respected and kind chuunin lost it, and took several, several, _several_ subordinates with him. Iruka Umino even took down the legendary copy-nin of 1000 jutsu so fast his Sharingan wasn't even out and active. The civilians all looked warily at the kind man and those who had children in the academy protectively brought their kids closer if the tanned man passed by. This annoyed Iruka.

_'Must everyone act so different with me now?'_ he thought silently to himself and sighed as he continued to the mission room. He hoped there wouldn't be a repeat of yesterday's incident. The Hokage herself grilled the shit out of him for hurting his fellow shinobi. Though in his mind, they all _completely_ deserved it. He let out a long-suffering sigh and walked into the doors of the mission room. To his surprise, no one was even there. Which was strange considering this was the gossip headquarters. Iruka could only sigh yet again as he knew exactly why. He didn't think he'd cause such a fuss! Seriously, they just needed to be taught a lesson and Iruka did just that, especially to that idiotic-bastard jounin. He growled mentally with just the thought of the infuriating man. He couldn't believe such a man would say such _rude_ things to his colleagues. The chuunin now verbally growled and the few chuunin in the mission room instantly squeaked and bolted towards the door, before being stopped by Genma.

"Relax; he's just thinking about the reason for his explosion. You're safe so long as you don't do anything stupid." He said calmly. The chuunin only nodded and very hesitantly walked up to the mission desk, gave the man their report, and scurried out of there as fast as they could.

The special jounin only laughed softly at the sight and gave Iruka a wide smile. "Wow, everyone is terrified of you Iruka! Good job!" He laughed softly and played with his ever-present senbon. The chuunin only frowned but blushed slightly and scratched the scar on his nose.

"Well… It's not really my fault…," he mumbled. It was that damn Kakashi's fault. "I don't like being feared. Though this is nice…" he added.

Genma looked at him confusedly for a second. "Um, what is?" He inquired.

"Oh. The quiet. I've never seen the mission room so calm." The chuunin supplied, while scratching the scar on his nose again.

Genma only nodded, then chuckled softly and shook his head, waiting for some people to come by. The only downside was that now it was horribly _boring_. He was the lead of the gossip center anyway! But, he just sighed and waited already cursing his luck he had to work the mission's room in the first place. Though yesterday was _very_ entertaining.

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Meanwhile, Kakashi relaxed on his bed as he thought about the damn chuunin. It wasn't his fault really… The man was just so fun and easy to get a reaction out of! And he knew there was truth in what Kakashi said… Kakashi let out a long sigh and sat up on the bed. He'd been thinking for several hours now, and it bugged the crap out of him. He just couldn't figure out _how_! And he was the genius! Kakashi sighed and raked his hand through his hair.

So far he came up with a few scenarios from most likely to least likely: A: Iruka's anger acted as a super boost to his skills and the man used clones in an amazing way, or the man was really that skilled when mad. B: Iruka was in ANBU. It was impossible to Kakashi's logical mind, but then again, so was what the "chuunin" did. Kakashi couldn't even activate his Sharingan for Kami's sake! C: Iruka had the gods working for him. And finally D: Iruka _is_ the god and could kick serious ass. Sadly, that, and general gods helping one chuunin was completely improbable, leaving only A and B.

Yet again Kakashi raked his hand through his hair and he finally decided he had to rest the curiosity quickly developing. He decided to break into the mission room records which shouldn't be too hard considering he was a genius.

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Kakashi set out at midnight. No one in their right mind would still be in the mission room at this time. He quickly (though silently) weaved his way through alleys and buildings throwing off imaginary pursuers and making his way to the mission room. He eventually arrived under a shadowed window and quickly un-did the lock and slipped in. He also made a mental note to tell the hokage to increase the security for the mission room, cuz' it was far too dangerous leaving such information open to practically all the village and enemy villages. He sighed and navigated his way through the halls looking for the records room.

He eventually found it and opened the door easily with a lock pick. He skulked his way to the file cabinet and looked around for the chuunin's record. It took him a while as he couldn't really remember the chuunin's last name for a while. Eventually he found it and grinned cheekily at the acquisition of his prize. He eagerly picked through the files and discovered… _nothing._ Or so the jounin thought as there were no dirty secrets or forbidden to know knowledge of the chuunin being in ANBU. He let out a long-suffering sigh as his second idea was just wildly mauled by a bear. But, certain he wouldn't leave being completely fruitless, he looked through every scrap and detail of the file. It was incredibly, and quite surprisingly, interesting. The _chuunin_ already had thirteen A-rank missions, but thankfully no S-rank missions. Which was _very_ good considering Kakashi himself only had forty-one S-rank missions in his entire career.

Kakashi was still completely surprised that the gentle chuunin had so many jounin-only missions. But, upon reflection, it'd make sense he was so strong as a chuunin. No _average_ chuunin coulda' even laid a hand on Kakashi. Kakashi sighed as his curiosity of the chuunin grew even deeper and he continued looking down the list of missions. Seventy-nine B-rank missions, one-hundred-eighty-seven C-rank, and two-hundred-ninety-six D-ranks missions… {1} Kakashi was rather impressed with the chuunin's record. Of course it didn't compare to his extensive record… But, as a chuunin he was very accomplished. His most probable theory definitely gained in strength upon seeing the chuunin's record. He looked through all the A-rank mission details very carefully as he wanted to see what the chuunin was trusted with… One caught his eye in particular.

"Oh? How curious… escort turned sour to the Village Hidden in the Clouds…" He drank in the details eagerly, scrolls scattered around him in his now cross-legged position. It appeared a previous team was escorting a very important woman to the village and were assaulted gravely by those trying to kill her… It appeared they wanted to start a war between the Cloud and the Leaf. Iruka was sent out for support… _'Just how talented are you, Iruka-sensei?'_ Kakashi wandered to himself as he saw that one jounin was killed in the battle and… Iruka almost was too. According to the report Iruka threw himself at the enemy ninja trying to save that jounin… This fact made Kakashi very uncomfortable as he felt something he wasn't familiar with. He simply chocked it up to the fact that a dead Iruka was just _wrong_. He shook his head and finally finished the other A-ranked mission details and decided he should have finished snooping hours ago, based on how stiff his back felt. His eye caught one interesting tidbit of information he overlooked originally though; Iruka was 26. Only one year younger than Kakashi. His eye widened a bit at that, but he silently put away the files and stretched his back, causing a satisfying pop to be come to Kakashi's ears. But then his heart froze as the light of the room came on with a "harmless" _flick_. _'Uh-oh…'_ Was Kakashi's last thought as he withdrew a kunai and instantly took an attacking position as no _allied_ ninja would dare be here at this hour.

He was greeted by the sight of a very pissed looking Iruka. The fact it was the man he was just snooping on shocked him to no end, and he realized that he's probably gonna' be dead soon as the chuunin wasn't exactly happy to _ever_ see the jounin. Kakashi gulped but threw on his trademark smile as he put the kunai away.

"Yo, Iruka-sensei!" he said cheerily, but in his mind he could only think one thing;

_'Shit.'_

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{1}: This and all factual information pertaining to the age of the men and mission ranks are based on the *OFFICIAL* information I got from my anime profiles (Ep. 1-37)! It always bugs me to no end that most people put a large age gap between them when they are only one year apart from each other! (OFFICIALLY!) Of course, this is all information based at the time the chuunin exams began BEFORE Naruto left, and right before Orochimaru tried destroying Konoha. So, I took into account all the time passed and the character's schedules in life and did a guess-timate based on that. So yes. It's slightly less accurate, but as accurate as you will get cuz' there are no official points exactly one year after Naruto leaves. }_} Sorry for the shpiel. Oh yes, and also (OFFICIALLY!) A-ranks are given only too special jounin and plain jounin, S goes only to the jounin. B goes to chuunin and special jounin, C too chuunin and genin, and D too just genin.

**A/N:** BAM! DONE! A shamelessly borrowed 'suicide pause' from my dear Ryuno-chu. (Go check out her story! It's absolutely lovely.) I did, in fact, just do that to you guys. I'm sorry. Forgive me… But it was too perfect not too do! So yeah… If you review you won't have to wait through the agony as long! :D No, I'm not shamelessly bribing you to review at all. }_} ANYWHO! Thank you so much for all the support guys! I'm glad you liked it! And, remember, if you can review, you can get a cookie! Or a cookie basket for the really good ones… So, until next time…

Ja ne! Ciao!  
>~I.L.<p> 


	3. The Chill of Shinobi

**A/N:** *sweat drop* Um… hi. Um, I am back with a new chapter and stuff! :D… (*crickets*) Right… Well, anyway, I know I haven't really been living up to the "angst" genre and that's cuz' I wanted some splashes of humor before… *_DUN DUN DUN_* The angst bomb? *sheepish smile and ducks under table from sharp kunais aimed at his soul* Okay… so yeah… I see you aren't happy with the angst bomb… I'm sorry! I did warn you though, that I was an angst whore. So yeah…um… Yeah… *awkward laugh* The reason I am writing and finishing this chapter, and ending up with about four hours of sleep (maybe?) is because well… *horribly scary laugh from behind him* Um… Rodrigo the (rabid-though I'd die if I told him that) plot bunny _demanded_ I finish this today… *sweatdrop as gun click is heard* I'M WRITING, I'M WRITING! GOD! On to the story before your esteemed author dies! *screams and runs to disclaimer*

**Disclaimer:** DO. NOT. OWN! I promise you if I did the Japanese world would love yaoi and I'd be the ruler of all the horrible and naughty things. So it's good Kishimoto-sensei owns Naruto. I'm only borrowing the characters and torturing them. :D

**Warnings:** **Yaoi!** (eventually), **angst-bomb**, and relatively naughty language. But this story SHOULD have a happy ending so don't die and stop reading, 'kay? I'll keep some humor so the flow of the story isn't raped. Oh yes, and flames will be used to burn Sasuke alive. (He's such a Mary-sue now, hate him. : ( ) Um… *Rodrigo growls* ON WITH THE STORY! (Damn, nearly one page of A/N…)

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'_Shit.'_ Kakashi thought. The one person he didn't want to see, or be caught by had found him. He silently cursed whatever he did in his past life that would come back to torture him so badly now. However, he steeled his nerves and prepared for the onslaught that was quite certainly coming for him. He also took this opportunity to plan out every escape route that wouldn't end with either him, or the chuunin dead. He was the copy-nin. Just cuz' Iruka got bad-ass when angry doesn't mean Kakashi can't handle the man.

"Kakashi-kun…," the chunin began _very_ politely.

'_Eeeef… He's already using his polite voice. This looks really bad.'_ Kakashi thought, panic beginning to muddle his clear mind, but he kept his cool façade and smiled as Iruka proceeded to finish his threat- er, question.

"May I ask _why_ you are in the mission files room, looking at said files, at three in the god damn morning? And looking through _personal_ files none the less?" He asked with an eye twitch, going down to 57% anger. For now. He was enjoying torturing the jounin, but that wouldn't do if he was incapacitated by fear.

Kakashi sighed and realized he couldn't talk his way out of this one, so he settled for his good-natured teasing. "Maaa, I couldn't figure out how you did that in the mission room earlier so I looked to a helpful box to answer the question. And may I say I learned a _lot_ Iruka-_sensei_."

Iruka's resolve snapped. "YOU LOOKED AT MY FILE?" He roared at the, now cowering, jounin.

"Yes?"

"WHY?"

"Cuz' I couldn't figure you out?"

"Just _what_ did you read Kakashi-sensei?" Iruka growled softly, but the tone of his voice was rather cold.

Kakashi felt a tense twisting of his stomach he never felt before. And he hated it. He glared at the chuunin.

"Everything, Iruka-kun." Kakashi said coldly, willing the feeling to go away.

Iruka responded by growling and glared coldly and darkly. "I hope you found it _very _informative." He said simply, then stomped out of the room and slammed the door.

For some reason, upon the chunin's leave, the knots and tight feeling of Kakashi's stomach only increased ten-fold. Kakashi clutched his flat stomach and growled at the door. He leaped out of the window and bounded towards the memorial stone from roof-to-roof at a breakneck pace. Almost like he was trying to escape something.

Eventually Kakashi got to the stone and landed coolly in front of it, though his breathing was slightly quicker than normal. Strange, he didn't feel like he exerted much physical strength at all. He looked at each delicately carved name in the stone and sighed, as he traced over the letters of those he knew so well. The feeling in his stomach came back again and he actually slightly whimpered. His stomach hurt significantly, and yet he knew he wasn't sick or had any other wounds. _'What's wrong with me Minato?...'_ he wondered silently and stared up to the sky, hand idly clutching stomach. He stayed there for a while, and ironically rain began to fall. He only remained outside, not caring how drenched he got as he found the mood perfectly soothing. It was only heightened as the day began to brighten, but was hidden by clouds.

'_It should be… emotional then?' _Kakashi wondered. He _was_ a genius so was aware how emotions could physically hurt. It'd also make sense as he felt like shit steam-rolled. All he could think of was the cold voice Iruka used. On _him_, too. He never heard the gentle man use a cold voice like that. That sounded like _hate_. _'Why do I hurt __**you**__ Iruka? Why am __**I**__ the one you hate? What did I do so wrong?' _He knew the answer already, but it made no sense why the chunin was so mad over one bad teasing session and looking through his files for genuine reasons… Then again, he wouldn't appreciate _anyone_ looking through his file. There was some crude stuff in there that made him shiver if he dared to even think about it. He didn't want anyone to know about _that_. But, he was a re-instated ANBU and jounin. He knew it was different. So, why? Why did it feel like his stomach was about to burst and knot itself into several deadly patterns and choke him alive? He groaned softly. He didn't like emotions ever since his team with the fourth Hokage, and he still didn't. It hurt. Badly. And he couldn't figure out how his emotions related to the caring sensei. He didn't really care about Iruka, did he? He groaned and instantly marched his way to the Hokage's office. He needed a mission. A mission was familiar, safe.

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Iruka punched the wall nearest to him, _hard_. The fucking incompetent jounin was right there where he was certain the jounin would _never_ be. It was freaking four in the morning damnit! He was in the missions room himself to relax and tend to the place. He didn't have classes the next morning so it really didn't matter where he was and how long. He reveled in that. He loved teaching, but it was so stressful! And that jounin making fun of him for his _duty _did not help with that. He knew everyone considered him weak and unable. He knew he wasn't anywhere near ANBU, but he knew he could handle himself. And that day, something inside him just _broke_. He let it all out and man did it feel good! But… He couldn't shake the guilt. It kept him awake, as did the new pedestal everyone held him on. He wished the jounin never came into his life. It only was hell with Kakashi. Iruka groaned softly and rubbed his aching forehead. And _tonight_ of all nights…

_(__F__lashback)_

It was a small sound. So quiet he was almost sure he didn't hear it, but then a shadowed figured dived into the hall and quickly walked to the records room. Iruka's heart bumped rapidly as he knew this was no ally. Not at this time. He grabbed a kunai tightly, and followed after the figure silently, surprised the man didn't sense him. This boosted Iruka's confidence and he dared sit down in front of the door as the man slipped into the room. He didn't come out for a long while. Upon hearing a 'pop' from the room Iruka burst into the room and the man did nothing, but Iruka saw the Leaf uniform and put away his kunai, and glared at the silver hair he had come to start hating. The man finally noticed Iruka and he had the gall to say 'hi' cheerily. Iruka growled.

(End flashback)

Iruka sighed deeply. The man was infuriating to no ends and today he was cold and different with Iruka. It pissed Iruka off and he responded by being cold. But he deserved to be, the man went through his file for god's sake! The chunin groaned and rubbed his forehead as he saw a figure bounce off into the distance. Probably the infuriating man. Iruka was a bit surprised that he took so long to leave, though. And Iruka sighed yet again, unwilling to care. He just wanted to go home and sleep. He felt guilty, and apologizing to the jounin was a horrifyingly painful thought. So he decided to poof away to his apartment and pass out, and he did just that, thoughts of the silver-haired man negatively floating around Iruka's head.

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**A/N:** I know it's short, but I'm tired and I actually like how it turned out. Oh yeah, and as for the lovely reviews informing me of my wrong-doings as far as 'official' goes, thanks so much! I must say I got really old "official" information. But it is original "official" and is closest to this current timeline so I will keep it if that's all right with all y'all. :D Aside from that… Thank, worship, and love the wonderful Ryuno-chu. She's my faithful beta and such a dear! Thanks go to her and her lovely suggestions and editing. Thank you! Now then...  
>BAM! BOMB OF ANGST CRUSHED YOUR HEARTS! DX I'm sorry! But I kept it somewhat humorous, so… Forgive me? It's not my fault it's Rodrigo's! Dx *Rodrigo giggles insanely and gunshots are heard*<p>

Kakashi: Silent Stranger is dead right now, so… Yeah. Review please! I'll give you cookies for support! And, if you review enough he'll be revived and come out with another chapter asap!

Ciao!

~I.L.


	4. Of Misunderstandings and Exhausted Ninja

**A/N:** *Revives from the power of reviews and perversity* I'm baaaaaack~! New chapter begged to be put up with the lovely support I'm getting! (Even if it came slowly…) Sorry for the wait, but I wanted sufficient support for the story, and so much I did get! Ah! I love you all! I also forgot to say special thanks for "Jenibara-sensei" and "Silky Otter" for telling me I failed with the ages in a way. But, damage is already done, and it's not TOO big of a deal right? The information used to be official. So think of it as "old official" :D  
>Also big thanks for all my precious reviewers whether anonymous or not! You give me the will to write! I'm sorry for the rather long wait too… I've been busy… Now then, onto the story before Rodrigo kills me again! P.S: Angst continues here on out and progressively worsens… :D<p>

**Disclaimer:** Yes, I secretly own and control Masashi Kishimoto cuz' my amazing yaoi fan powers give me mind and body control! (No. -.-)

**Warnings: Eventual Yaoi!** **Shounen-ai! Somewhat intense swearing!** That's about it I think… If you don't like any of this, you are in the WRONG place, so I must kindly ask you to GTFO. As it makes no sense why you're on here anyway… Flames will be used to light Bella and Edward on fire and to carry out insane rabid bunny get-togethers.

Without further ado…

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The rain poured freely, hitting a rather drowned-looking jounin mercilessly. Fuck, it hurt… Kakashi sighed as he clutched his chest. It was insanely upset and he has been spending the past four hours trying to figure out why Iruka caused that. _'What is it about you?'_ He thought idly, and sighed yet again. He could never figure out emotions to start with, he was a killer at age six, and his parents that were supposed to teach him how to be normal died. The few times he did figure out those emotions, the people they pertained to died. Since then, he avoided emotional interactions like the plague. Hence his mask and book. Besides all that, he really just couldn't figure things out and he knew it would end badly for him, but he came up with three plausible reasons, organized from most likely to least likely again.

One: He held some kind of affection and like towards the man, considering him his friend, and didn't even know about it. Two: He ACTUALLY liked the man, but it didn't make much sense as he was primarily interested in girls, and Three: He was in love with Iruka. Kakashi actually laughed out loud. _'As if! I don't even __**like**__ him, how could I ever grow to love a man like him?'_ Kakashi sighed, very amused at that, but then the present situation caused him to sigh yet again as he realized his emotions were still alive apparently. He shrugged and put on his brave façade again.

_'Yes, I do hurt emotionally…'_ He shivered as he thought of that _truth_. He hadn't let his emotions affect him for a long while, and he was bugged he lost control and didn't even know it. _'But why do I hurt?... I think…'_ he sighed deciding to stop thinking about the depressing ideas and train of thought. He knew he had to do one thing, and soon. He bounded off towards the academy, not caring he hadn't slept at all and was in the rain the entire time as well. He didn't realize that the chuunin didn't have classes today, and he abandoned his original plan to get a mission too.

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A tired chuunin rubbed his forehead, and sighed. _'I didn't know they were going to call me in so __**early,**__ ugh…_' The man only got about four hours of sleep before they came banging at his door declaring their need for help was great, and ya-dada-dada. He groaned and rubbed his eyes, knowing a _long_ nap was in order as soon as he got off. As he mechanically accepted the reports, his mind wandered to a certain silver-haired nuisance and he sighed. He'd been thinking of that man for hours now and how rude and annoying he could be when he wasn't allowed to be. Iruka just wanted a peaceful relationship with the man, and couldn't handle the fact that he was the only one of all shinobi who took great joy in insulting, annoying, and _torturing_ Iruka with his words and actions. To say the least it made Iruka feel like shit and he _really_ hated being so inferior and having it rubbed in his face.

And that man just _loved_ rubbing it in his face. So much so he went out of his way to go to the mission desk and always turn in his reports to Iruka and just mock him, _constantly_. To say the least, Iruka felt victimized and quickly after feeling that, he felt hated by the jounin. The man always looked down on him and insulted him. Iruka growled, now getting pissed at the gall of that damn shinobi, and resolved to castrate him in his sleep. Iruka sighed and continued working until the shift ended, absolutely certain he was going to avoid doing a double shift. He needed sleep, and _bad._

So, he stared at the clock and waited, and waited, and waited, and waited… "Oi, Iruka-sensei, eager to get somewhere?" Genma asked, rather wary of the "chuunin", his growling, and deadly aura. "Oh, gomen*, yes Genma-san, my bed." The chuunin replied.

Genma only smirked and the senbon chewer began to open his mouth, but suddenly a hand clapped against said mouth and he heard a sharp "Shhh" sound.

"Genma-kun! I thought you didn't have such a death wish?" Kotetsu pretty much screamed at the man. Iruka could only sigh thankfully and smile at Kotetsu. The man answered with a smile back and let go of Genma's mouth.

Iruka then started beaming as their arrival meant only one thing: it was time to hang out at the bar, and his shift was over. Except, he couldn't handle being awake for about two more minutes… So eagerly, he looked up at the clock and saw that it was indeed four P.M, and so promptly packed up and left, Genma and Kotetsu on his tail. It took Iruka a while to realize that meant they needed to go on their own and he felt incredibly guilty for what he was about to do. "Um, guys… I'm really tired, I think I'll just go home and sleep…?" He half stated and half asked.

The men's eyes only widened and they looked at Iruka strangely. "It's only 4 o' clock Iruka…" Kotetsu said, and inspected him for signs of fatigue. His aura of murder and exhaustion was enough to make him suspicious, but he knew Iruka wouldn't lie, and the man _was_ tired, so he just shook his head and nodded. Genma, on the other hand, wasn't so tactful and blurted out "Why?" with a dull expression. Kotetsu sighed, knowing the man didn't mean to be so retarded around the chunin, but found his pain amusing, so said nothing and watched.

Iruka only glared and restated his reason dangerously. "Because. I'm tired and exhausted and just worked the mission room for 10 god damned hours. Why the hell do you think?" Iruka asked, but then sighed, rubbed his forehead, and smiled apologetically as Genma looked like a kicked puppy. "I'm sorry Genma-san. I'm just really tired. Please excuse me." And with that he trudged his way home not even waiting for a response, and ignored the agape mouths of both men.

_'Only 5 more minutes!'_ Iruka's mind cheered and the chunin quickly picked up his pace as fast as he could go and effectively cut it down. He arrived at his door and very eagerly pulled out his keys and started opening the door when he felt a presence. His whole mind and body screamed to go inside and ignore the world, but his conscience made him turn around to look for who disturbed his salvation, and his sense of justice made sure to make them pay. And 'lo and behold, the single most aggravating and torturous man was behind him, standing at his doorstep, reading his _filthy_ book. Iruka's entire demeanor turned frigid and he glared at the man, regretting turning around.

"Excuse me Kakashi-sama, I'm tired and want to go sleep." His eyes added the 'and you know exactly why' part as his glare held, then he turned around to close the door on the jounin's face. Sadly, fate had different plans today.

"Wait, Iruka-sensei! I wanted to talk to you…" the man mumbled the last part and looked down, putting away his book. The sight perplexed Iruka and his eyes turned from angry, to curious, to suspicious, all in one second. Kakashi chuckled silently and remembered why it was so fun to tease the man. His eyes spoke far too many volumes than anything else. Iruka decided to stay and see what the man was up to, because if his instincts and body reading was correct, Kakashi was about to apologize.

"About?..." the chuunin ventured.

"Yesterday." The chuunin's guard was involuntarily all the way up in one instant and he glared again.

"Yes?" he asked coldly. This threw the jounin off, but he answered anyway.

"I wanted to say I was… sorry… for yesterday… I didn't mean to make you angry. I was just curiously looking at your file cuz' you're so interesting. You perplex me actually…" He mumbled, then looked at Iruka's eyes knowing that's how he'd know Iruka would react.

Iruka's eyes widened and went through several more emotions in one second, from shock, to happiness, to suspicious, and then downright angry, and finally ice cold. "A normal person would just _ask_ Kakashi-sama. "I can't help but know it was just so you could get dirt on me to torture me more, and say how _inferior_ I am to you." Suddenly, for the alarming second time that week, the chuunin broke. A far away part of his mind remarked it wasn't fair to Kakashi at all and he should've just went to bed before talking to the man as he was fatigued, but he firmly pushed it away and let loose the second dam of anger and frustration all due to Kakashi himself.

"I'll have you know that I understand I'm weak and could never compare to you, but that gives you no right to _rub it in my face_ every single fucking day and night and go out of your way to torture me. I KNOW I'M WEAK! Now would you _PLEASE_ stop fucking lying and saying you are "_sorry"_ cuz' I know you're freaking not! You've proven it through your actions towards me every god damned day. Now goodbye, and GOODNIGHT!" he roared and slammed the door on Kakashi's face and quickly stomped to his bed and laid down completely and totally drained. He also tried to ignore the insane pang of guilt as he realized Kakashi's eye widened in shock and unimaginable pain. It made no sense to Iruka, and he desperately ignored it and just fell asleep.

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Kakashi was beyond shell-shocked. The chunin just broke on him _again_. And he _apologized_. He only stood there for several more hours, not knowing how to react at all. Finally, when his mind caught up to him his genius made him realize Iruka had a _very_ valid point. What sorry person would do all that to a fellow shinobi? The lack of respect he had for Iruka also completely grounded him. He treated the man like dirt! Now it made sense as to why Iruka was so mad…

He shook his head, and a surprising sharp crippling pain in his chest nearly made him fall over. He briefly wondered if an assassin just stabbed his heart right then and there, but when he smelt no blood and heard no sound, and felt no katana or kunai, he realized it was his heart. Again. _Emotions_. Kakashi groaned and glared at the floor of the landing just before Iruka's apartment. He placed a loose hand over his heart and inaudibly whimpered needing to let out a cry of the pain. He finally had to admit his theory. He considered Iruka a friend, somehow, in some twisted way of his mind, and he hurt the friend unimaginably deep and also lost him.

Kakashi wanted to kick himself and incredibly hard at how idiotic he'd been. He also then cursed his lack of knowledge in social skills and norms as it led to his current predicament. He looked at the chuunin's door and was surprised again to realize his surroundings significantly darkened. He instantly looked up at the sun and to his never ending list of surprises found that it was actually the _moon_. _'How long have I been here?'_ He wondered absently, but then teleported to his house and decided to think there. It was safe and if he slept the giant hole in his chest could be ignored.

He fell asleep with one last thought; _'Of course the only friend I'd have I would treat like shit… it just hurts so much this is the only time Iruka had been so cold. And of course, the only time he ever hates would be with me. I'm the one person he hates in the entire village…'_ He cursed his position and punched the wall near his bed and felt the hole in his chest widen. He knew he messed up, but it wasn't fair him of all people would be subject to hate from the chuunin. "Fucking chunin. Confusing me to no end and crushing me without even trying…" He mumbled darkly, then gave in to the blackness of his mind.

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**A/N:** *sizzle is heard* Ouch… that's some angst right there. I'm pleased to discover I had a few traces of humor left though… I think I made a nice transition, you? (Translation: REVIEW PLEAAASE AND TELL ME!) Remember, reviews are rewarded with cookies and much faster updates. My goal: 5 reviews each chapter. My hope: 3 reviews. :Heart:? Btw: praise and love the lovely beta Ryuno-chu. :D

*Hands out triple stuffed chocolate chip cookies to all past reviewers eagerly*

Yosh! Longest chapter yet.

*('Gomen ' means 'sorry' if I'm correct…)


	5. Warmth

**IMPORTANT A/N: **Oh. My. Facking. Gackt! I HAVE REACHED MY GOAL OF 10,000 WORDS! ! Ahem… I'm sorry, IT'S JUST SO FREAKING AMAAAAAZING! So, yeah. I'M SO PROUD! And other update: I now have this planned out to CHAPTER 8 :O! I do see an end to the angst in sight as well! But according to the way I want this story to play out, It's going to get _FAR_ past chapter 8. Maybe like… chapter 20… I don't know, it depends on you guys. I HOPE YOU'RE AS EXCITED AS I AM! I do hope you guys read these author notes o.o. Btw: do you guys think Kakashi is too weak? Cuz I mean… Idk it just screams at me _horrible_ but idk… He's just in so much pain when he's usually infallible… so I am now concerned. **Especially with this chapter**. So in this case I _NEED_ you to tell me what you think cuz' I'm super concerned! Dx  
>Also, I intend to reward your guys' patience with THREE NEW CHAPTERS. So the next two should be out in the next few days. (Assuming I actually write a lot in these coming days left of break.)<p>

**Disclaimer: **Oh. You have no idea how damn bad I wish… It would have been an amazing X-mas gift. *wink wink nudge nudge* But I do own an insane amount of KakaxIru pictures. :D  
>Sadly, Kishimoto didn't give me ownership. What a pity.<p>

**Warnings:** See all chapters. -.-'

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Kakashi couldn't handle being in the village anymore. Not that it was too long to begin with, but Iruka just kept on confusing the man when he even glimpsed him. To say the least it was fucking up Kakashi and rather bad. The man was startled and unhappy with how his usual façade was broken so cleanly, and affecting him so deeply now. He honestly didn't like it. At all.

He was, after all, the legendary and infallible Kakashi Hatake. So the fact that a lowly chuunin like Iruka could affect him at all was confusing. He knew one thing though: Iruka was hurting him emotionally because he was mad at him and hated him. This affected Kakashi because he considered Iruka his friend of sorts, no matter how twisted or what way that happened. Kakashi was simply confused at how he even began liking the man to consider him his only friend. But, no matter his thoughts, he always ended up confused and hurt to a point by Iruka.

His entire stay was beginning to border on torturous as he couldn't talk to Iruka, and the man just confused him to no ends. So he did the only thing that made sense to do: he got a mission that would take at least one month and give him plenty of time to think about how to remedy his situation, cuz' his fragile mindset was in danger of being shattered, as he was so lost. It was a really negative position, and for the sake of the village he had to leave for a nice long time. So he quickly got a mission from Tsunade and booked it out of Konoha. With all the necessary supplies and equipment, of course, but he still left nonetheless.

He had to get out of Konoha and just _think_.

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Iruka felt like shit. As soon as he freaked out on Kakashi and laid on his bed, he did fall asleep. Only problem was that he woke up about two hours after his outburst only to _remember _what he did. He sighed as he sat down at his coffee table, beyond glad Kakashi _finally_ left. He reflected again on the surprise he got after waking up.

Iruka woke up with a start, trying to quickly figure out his surroundings, then when he realized he was home he relaxed and basked in the glorious feeling of slowly becoming aware. Eventually he opened his eyes and glanced out the window. Seeing that the sun was just setting, he smiled and stayed, watching the shifts and changes of the light and beautiful sunset. It complemented his slow wake up perfectly, but then he _fully_ woke up. He remembered suddenly there was a jounin he was beginning to actually _hate_. And said jounin _apologized_ and what did he do? He lost it. Again. Iruka groaned loudly and banged his head on the pillow, then continued banging his head as the immense waves and oceans of guilt drowned him as he remembered the jounin looked completely shocked and _hurt_.

"I hate you." He mumbled into his choked pillow and groaned again, cursing his emotions _again_. Finally, with the insane guilt slightly alleviating with the help of his make-shift stress ball he eventually got up and walked to his kitchen to make tea. He felt a presence outside his door, but remembering what happened last time, firmly ignored it and started the tea before even trying to figure out who it was. He turned on his music and hummed it softly aloud trying to relax and forget about the day.

He got the kettle off the stove and hummed happily as he poured himself a generous amount, before returning it to the stove. He then set to work trying to make dinner. Key word being _trying_. The presence outside his door hadn't left yet, and finally Iruka _had_ to investigate it now. So silently, he set down his current task and closed his eyes, meditating and sensing the chakra. After finally focusing on the chakra a wave of hurt and pain hit him but it was all masked by confusion; presumably from the chakra. He quickly dropped his focus and opened his eyes, shock making them wide. He could feel the angsty chakra without even trying now that he was paying attention. But what made it worse was that he recognized the chakra. It was _Kakashi's_ chakra. "What are you still doing here?..." He asked aloud, not expecting a reply. The guilt came back one-hundred fold and he slowly stepped away from the door.

_'What did I __**do**__?'_ He thought, Kakashi's shock still permeating from his chakra. He should've held his tongue! He should've listened to his instincts! He shouldn't have attacked the man _again._ Iruka let out a soft groan and firmly focused on making his food. It made absolutely no sense the man was _still_ outside his door two or so hours after the fact. No, no _sane_ man would be outside his door so long and right after the fact Iruka let loose on them. _'But… he's no normal man…'_ Iruka firmly reminded himself. He knew he messed up big now, and he had to figure out how to fix it. Even if the man completely deserved it and shouldn't care a lowly chuunin yelled at him. _'Wait…'_ Iruka thought. He then realized he affected the man deeply if he both hurt him, and his yelling made the man stay outside of his house for hours on end. Iruka wasn't sure why Kakashi was outside his door, but he knew the man cared about what Iruka had to say and that surprised the chuunin greatly.

But, he knew he couldn't bring the man out of his stupor without serious consequences. So much so, he had to actually avoid _alerting_ the man. But, if his cooking and music didn't alert the man, Iruka wasn't entirely sure what would. He just felt the guilt inside eating him up.

Iruka sighed, the guilt still deeply affecting him, and he set his grading aside and stretched. The man's presence stressed him greatly, and he decided to take a quick shower before going to bed for well-deserved rest. The man had been there for several more hours after Iruka awoke and finished dinner, ate it, and cleaned it. Kakashi seemed to make time proceed very slowly. Iruka sighed and stretched widely again, and quickly hopped into the shower to relax and forget about the troubles of life.

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A man stumbled into his apartment breathing heavily and tearing off his ruined uniform, a dark look was in his eyes and he simply walked into his bathroom, pausing as he saw his reflection in the mirror. A heavily scarred chest, now covered in more scratches in which blood was oozing out. A long gash across his arm haphazardly bandaged and a sallow face in which cold eyes looked out. Kakashi couldn't recognize himself but he shook his head and stepped into the shower, turning it on full blast and letting the grime and muck of his latest mission fall off.

He stood there for hours on end, letting the water wash out the impurity of his soul and wounds. The jounin stared at the water as it went from red and brown to the clear color it should be. He sighed in relief as it became clear again, and he finally stretched his sore body, and began actively scrubbing himself. It was always his ritual to come back down to the normal world, and remember that he was indeed human. It was either wasting water, or taking out his dark side in the normal, much darker ways to complement this mission side of himself. He was a shinobi and he never really enjoyed it. It was simply what he knew how to do… Kakashi sighed and leaned on the cold wall of his shower and stared at the steady stream of water. He needed to relax.

Eventually, the man got out and dried himself off. After that was done, he wrapped the towel around his waist and went around his apartment, cleaning the bloody and tattered clothing left around on the floor. He did this absentmindedly, humming and relaxing. He was coming back down to the normal world, although he didn't really care he was cleaning while wearing only a towel. The man sighed contently and finally went to his bed to sleep, not even bothering to put any clothes on. He simply slid into the covers and drifted off, intent on sleeping until the next ice age.

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Iruka was more than on edge. He was frantic, panicky, alert, and otherwise showing all the signs of a sugar addict deprived for weeks. Why was he so unstable? Because Kakashi left on a mission. A _solo_ mission that was _one month long. _Iruka's genius of a mind added that together to make a _month long solo mission_. That was of course all he knew, but besides that, he also knew it was S-rank. It was common knowledge that any mission that takes about a month and was solo was very difficult. In the case of Kakashi Hatake of the Sharingan, it was definitely an S-rank.

But, that was not the only reason Iruka was about to have a panic attack. He _knew_ why Kakashi took that mission and no matter what Iruka thought, it boiled down to the fact that it was because of him. Iruka groaned and a bit harshly stamped the approved seal on the most recent mission report handed to him by Asuma. He smiled apologetically at him and continued working, noticing the slightly uneven wrinkle on Asuma's vest. It bugged him, but he sighed and ignored it. Asuma gave him a look implying they were going to talk after his shift. Iruka only nodded and waved on the next ninja in line.

As he performed his duties mechanically his mind wandered off to how he got so frantic and panicky.

It started out normally, Iruka just went through his duties, but when he didn't see Kakashi at all for one week he began to worry. Mostly because he always saw the copy-nin at least once-a-week. He even slightly missed Kakashi's teasing. But only slightly and if he was totally honest with himself. So he decided to see where the man went. Of course, the best and most logical place to go to find out was Tsunade.

He found out that Kakashi left on a mission. For a month. The day after Iruka broke on him _for the second time_. It didn't help Tsunade mentioned that he looked exhausted and didn't really want to give him the mission in the first place because he looked so distracted. Iruka's heart clenched and he only smiled at her eyes closed, because he secretly knew exactly why.

After discovering this knowledge, his working mind slacked off considerably and his students knew it. So, of course, being the kind-hearted kids they were, they took full advantage of it and made Iruka's life hell. He was reduced to torturing them back with hours of homework and paperwork or lectures. He also did this because it was the only thing that he could do while his mind was so distracted and not risk killing himself or others.

Luckily, it worked to a point and his students calmed down enough for him not to kill himself at both jobs. Now he was only sleep-deprived and going slightly insane. This of course worsened as the weeks went by and Iruka could no longer sleep at night because of his worry and guilt.

So that lead to now, the day after the month was up and Iruka was looking incredibly similar to a starved and manic weasel, complete with eye twitches. Genma and Izumo were both very concerned for their friend as he seemed about to lose it. They decided not to alert Iruka to their concern as it would probably end with their death. So they offered silent support smiling and treating Iruka like normal so he wasn't aware of how insane he was going.

Iruka's shift ended, as did theirs and they would later find Iruka that day to be completely normal again. Or at least a normal exhausted Iruka that over-worked himself like always.

As Iruka left he walked straight to the pork grill restaurant Asuma was always at. He intended to have a full meal and tell Asuma about why he was so on edge. He found the man at his usual table, surprisingly without his students, and smiled at him, feeling a bit relaxed already. He was glad Asuma was his friend, and suddenly felt himself relax more as he sat down silently waiting for the man to address him.

Asuma called a waitress over acknowledging Iruka silently and smoked his cigarette, at ease.

"So, Iruka, what's up?" He asked simply in his gruff voice. Iruka blushed slightly at the lack of an honorific and scratched his scar.

"Ah, um… Just worried I guess." He began.

"About?"

"Kakashi-sama…" He sighed and looked away, waiting for the food.

"Oh?"

"Yeah,… we sorta' had a fight. I don't even know how it happened. And not a fight like friends! No, he is NOT my friend. I guess we had an argument? I… well, I'm being unfair to him and I feel really guilty. He left on that mission because of me, you know?... I've just treated him really coldly and I sorta... hate... him?..." The chuunin rambled but Asuma's eyes widened at one fact.

Iruka Umino, the kind-hearted sensei actually almost hated someone, and that someone was Kakashi Hatake. Asuma groaned and rubbed his forehead, knowing this was the worst situation that could possibly happen.

"Iruka… you realize that you are the only one Kakashi ever opened up to, right?" Asuma asked.

Iruka only stared at him. "He hasn't opened up to me Asuma…"

"Well, perhaps not 'open up' but more so affect. Emotionally. Notice how he has never teased anyone else?" Iruka only nodded slowly but still had a confused look in his eye.

"Well, that is because you somehow penetrated his guard."

Iruka's eyes only widened, and the chuunin only looked down and blushed a bit ashamed. Asuma groaned again, but the food came and they ate in silence, thinking about the silver-haired jounin. Eventually they finished their food and began talking again. Iruka learned that Kakashi has never opened up to anyone since he was 14 or so, and Asuma learned that the situation Kakashi was in was bordering beyond bad. He sighed too, knowing only they could solve their issues. He did hope he could help out Iruka, but the man was about as bad as Kakashi as far as help went. He sighed again and thought only one thing; _'How troublesome…'_.

"So, that is also why I am so scattered and worried. I feel guilty for sending him on the mission and he still hasn't come back. It's a day after the month right now…" Iruka mumbled shyly.

Asuma only laughed softly.

"He came back today sensei."

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Kakashi awoke late in the afternoon of the next day and groaned as he felt like shit steam-rolled into a patty of misery. Of course, that was all physical. But sadly he was awake, and his brain caught up with him as fast as it could and reminded him of both the mission, and _why_ he went on the mission.

_'Iruka…'_ was all he thought before groaning again loudly. His mission worked. Very well. He knew he had to get into the man's good graces again and he was happy to do just that to claim his friend back, but the problem was _how_. He already apologized and look how well that worked. The man hated him and Kakashi was sure of it. Again, he groaned and wanted to lay in bed for the remainder of the day, but he had to figure this stuff out. And what better way than to watch Iruka?

So he got up, got dressed in his uniform, and jumped off to the academy. He arrived outside of Iruka's classroom and was surprised at how well he knew where it was. He stealthily approached the tree and jumped into it, quickly selecting a comfortable position and then wandered briefly why he never watched Iruka teach before. The tree was very comfortable and he laughed silently at how it seemed almost made for him. He began reading his beloved Icha Icha, but when the plot line dulled he found himself focusing on the teacher.

Iruka was going through a lecture of chakra control and Kakashi himself was entranced. The man's cinnamon skin but fiery aura of command drew him in to listen along with the children. He spoke loud enough for Kakashi's keen ears to listen as well as the kids and was surprised he was learning new things because he forgot about them. He forgot the basics as he was such a high level shinobi for so long. He learned new tricks he only wished he could have used for his most recent mission, tricks that were helpful because they were so simple and required little chakra to perform. Certainly helpful.

As the man lectured he noticed that a lot of the students were listening. (Of course not Konohamaru, or other trouble makers). But nonetheless, Kakashi could tell Iruka was a very good teacher. He actively answered questions to help them understand, used examples from their own pranks, and simply had a positive and caring attitude towards them. _'No wonder Naruto loves him so much…'_ Kakashi thought idly. The sheer warmth Iruka had towards his pupils left Kakashi feeling a bit cold himself. He realized he wanted the warmth Iruka portrayed towards them.

Perhaps not the warmth of only students either… No, Kakashi wanted a slightly different warmth. With this new found desire he made a personal promise to get on Iruka's good side again, and be an actual friend. Then he returned back to Cassiopeia declaring her undying love for Blaze as they finished their love scene.

Quite sometime after Kakashi finally realized Iruka's soft, but strong voice was no longer in the background. He looked up and saw the man packing his things and putting some papers in his bag to grade later he assumed. But this sight also made Kakashi sigh as he realized he had to move with Iruka to watch him for some kind of hint on how to get on the man's good side again. He needed to know what Iruka liked, what he hated, he needed info to confront his self-appointed mission.

So with this mindset he got up, stretched as best as he could, and then followed after Iruka as he left the academy. He was pretty sure Iruka was going to the mission room, but he couldn't be certain. As Kakashi followed in the streets of Konoha attempting to be stealthy but not enough to alert the civilians, he noticed Iruka was generally exuding that warmth to everyone. He smiled at the villagers, occasionally stopped to talk to a few (at these times Kakashi had to find _inventive_ ways to hide), and was generally infectious to all. The general kindness of this _chuunin_ floored Kakashi. He was supposed to be a ninja, after all! But his warmth… Kakashi wanted to be on the receiving end of that.

He sighed and continued reading his book as he followed Iruka, hoping his self-appointed mission wasn't going to end pre-maturely. But unfortunately, it did as Iruka stepped into the mission room. Kakashi sighed again, knowing he couldn't go in, so he bounded off to the memorial stone to think. Or at least that was his plan until an ANBU took him straight to the hokage since he hadn't reported back on the mission yet.

He mentally face-palmed at the fact he forgot to report in. He knew he was tired, but it takes a special amount of tiredness for Kakashi to forget that. He sighed as Tsunade lectured him endlessly on why he should have gone to the hospital, or how he fails at life because he didn't report in, or how he endangered the village cuz' yada-yada-yada-blah. When Tsunade eventually finished he quickly took off to get away from her and save his ears. He was glad she cared to a point, but at the same time, it was annoying.

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Kakashi sighed as he walked down the now deserted streets of Konoha and wished he could have continued his mission. The sooner he figured out how to be Iruka's friend, the better. So with that he wandered down the streets aimlessly, guided by the moon. He was still confused as hell with the damn chuunin, but he was sure he could figure it all out when he was Iruka's friend again. Or… at least Iruka tolerated him like a friend? He groaned and rubbed his forehead, still confused as ever when he heard the chuunin's voice.

Being the elite ninja Kakashi was of course, he followed the sound stealthily and found that Iruka was being guided by Asuma somewhere. His inner self let out a manly squeal of joy that his mission could be continued, and of course he followed. They eventually stopped at what Kakashi assumed to be Iruka's apartment. But, to Kakashi's surprise Asuma didn't leave when Iruka opened his door. Instead, he actually came in with a smile. _'Are they hooking up?' _Kakashi thought briefly, shocked. But then realized that was a silly idea and Asuma _was_ straight and with Kurenai. So, he jumped to another handy tree near Iruka's window, and watched as both men settled into Iruka's home.

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"Oi, Asuma. I think I drank too much." Iruka said with a slight slur and goofy laugh.

Asuma only rolled his eyes and sighed, realizing Iruka didn't drink much at all.

"Tea?" He asked, and without waiting for an answer he began rummaging through the kitchen to make some. He again sighed as he realized he was good friends with the chuunin if he knew where his kitchen supplies were. They didn't really mean to end up good friends, it just happened as Iruka helped Asuma out when he was breaking. Since then they've been very friendly. It was hard not to be friends with this man though, he only exuded warmth. _'Except for a certain idiot jounin…'_ Asuma grumbled in his mind.

As they waited for the tea, they only idly chatted and otherwise acted very familiar with each other as if they have done this several times. Asuma himself was surprised at how natural it felt to be with this chuunin and suddenly realized just _how_ Iruka broke through Kakashi's shields. When the tea shouted its completion, they idly talked and hung out through the night.

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Kakashi watched this with dark eyes. He never knew Asuma was such good friends with Iruka and felt a bit cheated that Asuma hasn't helped him out, but then he realized he wasn't exactly friends with anyone including Asuma. But what troubled Kakashi most was the familiarity they both had with each other that transferred to Iruka's signature warmth. Seeing how Iruka acted with everyone left a sour taste in the copy-nin's mouth, and he felt cheated by the world. But he knew it was his fault, and he knew he had to fix it. The only question that ran through his mind as he bounded away from the scene of domestic tranquility was how he could be friends with this chuunin.

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**A/N: **BAM! FINALLY DONE! I am so happy I FINALLY got this chapter out! AND it's the longest chapter yet guys! I hope it slightly makes up for my HORRID delay. I am sooooo sorry you had to wait so long for this chapter, but hey, it's finally out! Woo! I hope you enjoyed it.

So, please review now! I need you guys to tell me how it was cuz I can't shake the feeling this chapter was really rough and horrible. But, until next time,

Ciao!

Also: Praise and love the lovely beta Ryuno-Chu who made this chapter possible by editing how horrible it was at the beginning.


	6. Cold Blooded Tool

**A/N:** Chapter 6… wow… This is rather exciting. I really have nothing to say though, so I'll just move along the story quickly.

**Disclaimer:** No, I don't own anything related to Naruto unless it is marketed to consumers. I own two dolphin plushies, and a lot of Naruto posters. But not the epic manga, anime, series, music, etc, etc, etc.*Forlorn and sad sigh*

**Warnings: **I prefer to surprise you people. (Is that a hint for _something? _~.^) And 'sides, with the summary, genre, and past chapters you should know where things are going. That, and the fact it's chapter six…

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He was lost. He didn't know what to do, how to start, or even how to talk to the man. Everything he did seemed foolish and stupid to him, while the chuunin was relatively unaware of his presence. After he spied Iruka's little scene with Asuma he was still unsure how to apologize. He knew he liked hanging with friends, but sadly Kakashi wasn't his friend… He knew he liked tea. But, it would be a bit odd to just give tea to him as an apology… So he continued his self-appointed mission to get on Iruka's good side again. Kakashi could only get on his good side in one way, and knew he had to apologize correctly and the best way he could to Iruka. He even took a bold move and looked at books. Yes, the infamous Sharingan Kakashi went to a book to help him apologize.

Sadly, said book didn't help much at all. It just said to do what makes them happy and use that as an apology. Kakashi didn't think he could give students to Iruka, and he doubted the chuunin liked much else besides teaching. He knew Iruka liked books, while he was watching the chuunin for the week Iruka occasionally spent a long amount of time on books. The only problem was that Kakashi was unsure how to pick out a book for Iruka.

The silver-haired man groaned frustratedly, and ran his hand through his hair. He couldn't give Iruka anything as an apology without help. And he knew for sure he had no one to help him out. _'Gah! Why do I want to do so much for you Iruka?...'_ he thought as he groaned in frustration. In any other normal circumstance he would have stopped trying after the person yelled at him and forget about them completely. But this chuunin… Iruka… He penetrated Kakashi's shell and now Kakashi was powerless to reject the man. This was the first time Kakashi could remember that he wanted someone else's friendship and connection after Minato die. After Minato died, Kakashi's world dimmed, and after Rin died, he didn't want any more warmth as it would just be taken away from him again. But now he realized he needed a friend and unwittingly became friends with someone in his mind. Now he needed them back.

_'Bonds… Ties to people… A ninja isn't supposed to have any that could endanger the village by putting that bond first… But is it wrong for a ninja to have some friends? All I've ever had were business partnerships and acquaintances… I don't want anyone to know me for me… But now… Now I'm thinking I may want to try again… Now I'm thinking I'll give a bond a chance…'_ Kakashi sighed as his thoughts turned severely depressing and he only wandered through the streets, hands in pockets and single eye watching the cracks of the street and occasional puddle. _'What have I done that Iruka always told me off about besides the teasing?...' _His mind passed through several of the interactions almost all of which were in the mission room, and came up with only one thing. "My reports…" He mumbled aloud into the gray sky. He remembered Iruka always glared at him and chastised him for how poor of a quality his mission reports were. He laughed softly actually starting to understand why he teased the man even more clearly.

"Maybe…," he started "If I write out an apology on a nice report?..." He then scoffed aloud at how ridiculous the idea was. _'A jounin writing out "I'm sorry" on a __**nice**__ report...'_. He shook his head and sighed realizing this was beginning to border on hopeless. He laughed humorlessly and changed his direction to the memorial stone, watching shattered bits of his reflection phase by in the puddles around him. "How am I supposed to ever be friends with someone? I'm a cold-blooded killer… I don't deserve anything besides serving my village… and that's my duty…" He sighed again realizing he was being more depressing than usual and arrived at the memorial stone. He smiled joylessly and stared at the three names he knew so well.

"Why did you ever save me Obito? It's clear I am a lost cause…" He sighed again and looked up towards the gray sky and smiled as it began raining again. _'Seems the gods know when to express my feelings well.'_ He laughed humorlessly again and sighed yet again. "How would you suppose I go about this? How do you become friends with someone that hates you?..." he asked the stone, not expecting a reply. He sighed again and gently stroked the marble surface. "You shouldn't have saved me Obito… You would have made the world much better…" he spoke softly, and let his head and body go through the strange emotions he kept on feeling.

_'You are so confusing to me, Iruka… I have never really talked to you, yet somehow… Somehow… You became my friend. I always preferred your presence even though I never showed it and just teased you…' _the jounin sighs yet again and stares up at the gray sky as he lets the rain soak into his mask and uniform. _'How…?'_ is all he thought as he stayed there in the rain.

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Kakashi sighed again and sat up in his bed. He still had no answer for what to do and was now seriously considering his ridiculous idea for a good mission report… He knew it was a step in apologizing and was a seriously viable option, but he wandered how Iruka would react to another apology… The thought of Iruka just glaring at him coldly and saying something like "Do a proper report," hurt Kakashi deeply. If he was totally honest with himself he'd say he was apprehensive but certainly NOT scared. No, why would the jounin be scared of an apology? He didn't even need to apologize as he already did once…

The jounin sighed again after fully waking up and slipping on his uniform. He was at a loss and needed to try to be friends with the chuunin. He just had no idea how and wanted to punch himself for being so unknowledgeable. He knew it was wrong to seek a friendship when he was still in ANBU, but he couldn't continue living as a machine. He thought that Iruka could perhaps give his life some kind of meaning besides going home to rest and going back to be used by the village again. He was tired of being used.

So with that thought process he left his cold apartment and started to walk around again. He didn't really know where he was going, but he continued walking anyway, eyes going over the words of his Icha Icha, but not actually comprehending them. His mind was on more pressing matters such as what to do about Iruka. That's when he noticed he was outside of Iruka's classroom again, and he smiled sadly then jumped into the tree, reading his Icha Icha with the calm voice of Iruka in the background. He eventually began dozing off and finally fell asleep with the book open and on his chest as the sky kept its dull gray color. If someone was to look inside the tree, they'd find a relaxed and calmly sleeping Kakashi, loosely holding his book on his chest. But if they were to look after Iruka left, they'd find him having a rough nap.

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Kakashi awoke sometime later with a start and marveled at how he didn't fall off the tree, and that he fell asleep in the first place. He just felt at peace for a little while. The man sighed and looked to the sky to find that it was approaching late afternoon and that Iruka was done with his classes. He let out another breath of air, tucked his book away, and began writing his mission report in the tree. It took him several hours as it was the most effort he ever put into a report before. He admired his handiwork though, and even signed it with his henohenomoheji* symbol. By the time he finished it was evening and he had to turn it in. It would be early too if he did it today! Surely Iruka would forgive him…

So Kakashi cheerily started towards the mission room, but thoughts began invading his happy bubble as he slowly approached the mission room. _'This should work, right? I wrote out an honest apology on the back of this report… But Iruka is busy and that also counts as defacing a report. And when I give it to him what do I say or do? Do I tell him what I did? How will he react?' _With each question Kakashi felt his heart beating faster and sweat began forming. _'He… He will take it right? He won't glare at me and say he doesn't care right? He won't laugh… would he? Would he rub it in my face…?'_

Kakashi finally stopped outside the large windows as he realized he was only twenty steps from entering. Then he saw Iruka smiling, talking to Asuma, and froze. _'Would you hate me more?'_ His head felt dizzy and his heart felt icy. _'I can't give this to you… You won't believe me; you'd only hate me more… I'm sorry I ruined this friendship before it even started Iruka, I'm sorry I hurt you so much… I'm sorry I'm a tool for war… I'm sorry I wanted to be your friend… Someone as kind as you doesn't deserve dealing with someone like me.'_ And with those last thought he firmly turned around and walked away from the mission room, ignoring the foreign sting he felt in his eyes and firmly shook his head.

'_You aren't for me…'_

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**A/N: ***deep sizzle is heard*Woooooow… I just did that, didn't I? I'm sorry this chapter is so short, but it goes through needed emotional depth of Kakashi and emphasizes the angst! Forgive me cuz' I put it out so fast? Dx

*The henohenomoheji is Kakashi's symbol and is composed of hiragana to make a scarecrow face. It's also on the back of each of Kakashi's nin dogs. If you really need to know what it looks like, just google henohenomoheji. Images should appear with several pics of it. It's easy to find. (I'm pleased to say I can draw it as well!)

*hands cookies out to past reviewers* I think I shall also start replying to my anonymous reviewers at the end of the chapters! Yay! (Assuming I have any. -.-')


	7. Abyss of the Heart

**A/N:** Hi again! Chapter 7! EEP! Sooo exciting! And I can tell you this is where it starts getting very good. So much drama! *laugh manically and evilly with Rodrigo*

**Disclaimer: **No. =.=

**Warnings: **See past chapters. : P

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Kakashi's head felt dizzy. He was about to enter the mission room and for some reason his heart was beating much faster than it should be. He briefly, though seriously considered his heart was about to explode _because_ of how fast it was beating…

_Flashback _

It caught Kakashi by surprise, and he was dumbfounded to say the least. He suddenly started seeing Iruka everywhere and soon could only think about him and his cold tone of voice when he apologized to the man. Kakashi knew his heart kept hurting by the fact it was _Iruka_ that treated him coldly. All he could remember every time he saw the chuunin were his cold eyes, and acidic words. But then his dream reminded him of something else.

_He was sitting on "his tree" outside of Iruka's classroom, reading Icha Icha. He jumped down after the bell rang dismissing the students to lunch. But to his surprise he walked right up to the window of Iruka's class and leaned on the sill. Iruka came up to him with some books and papers in hand and… __**smiled**__. Kakashi found it addictive that __**he**__ was the one being smiled at and happily rested his head on one hand while the other loosely dangled on the sill. His eye curved up in his trademark smile and Iruka began talking to him. He knew he was Iruka's friend, and he just enjoyed this unique warmth he felt at being connected. A far away part of him remarked it wasn't the same kind as he had with Minato, or his former team, but just as enjoyable so he firmly threw it out the metaphorical window._

His dream reminded him of the possible warmth Iruka could give him, and with that brief feeling of having all of that warmth to himself, he craved it like air itself. He knew he was being ridiculous. He _was_ the copy-ninja, but he was addicted to the chuunin. He _needed_ that same feeling again. The man was just so intriguing and unique to the silver-haired jounin. No ninja should be that open, but yet… He couldn't stop remembering their "chat" in his dream. The familiarity, everything about it gave him hope as he remembered the chunnin's cold eyes. It made him think that maybe, just maybe… He had a chance to make those eyes twinkle with joy or happiness instead.

But his need for the possible chance caused him to enter a downward spiral of misery. He kept being forced to remember Iruka hated him and it killed him. He wanted these foreign feelings to stop. He was tired and quickly becoming miserable. Not even leaving on a mission helped. It actually endangered him greatly as he was so distracted. So he stopped going on missions for a little while, and started watching the chuunin when he had the chance. He never jumped up in the tree outside Iruka's class again though, as he was worried he'd be spotted. The chuunin _did_ have skill. He brought down Kakashi in a matter of seconds. Of course, that was with the element of surprise, but still. Such an ability to surprise everyone _and_ him was noteworthy. People still kept talking about "what happened in the mission room".

So this continuous spiral of misery kept going as he remembered all the negative things Iruka did and how he was missing out on such a kind chuunin. He knew he didn't deserve to be his friend, but now he hoped and craved just something; the smallest bit. The hope finally manifested itself into a dire need to at least _try_.

_End flashback_

And so here was Kakashi now. Heart beating a mile a minute and his stress and worry levels on an unprecedented high. He didn't care that people looked at him strangely as they passed him by and quickly entered the mission room; he was focused on his own mission to give his stupid nice report to Iruka. But for some reason, he couldn't force himself to move. He knew he had to soon though. Iruka's shift was about to end, and standing outside the mission room for so long was highly strange and suspicious. So with immense god-like effort, Kakashi found his legs and forced himself into the mission room, ignoring the growing pit in his stomach.

There was the chuunin, looking at him expectantly and Kakashi honestly couldn't feel his body anymore as intense sweat began forming all over his body. He walked over to the chuunin giving him his trademark smile and looking like he wasn't about to freak out and have a panic attack. But inwardly each step felt like he walked a mile and he neatly set down his prized report.

"Here you go Iruka-sensei." He said pretending to be completely calm, but as he saw Iruka's eyes widen into near imperceptible sizes, Kakashi froze, and in an attempt to not freak out in the entire mission room, instantly "POOFED!" away to his apartment.

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Iruka stared at the place Kakashi once was, then slowly -ever so slowly- let his gaze fall on the _clean_ paper. The _clean mission report_. His mind being the ever blossoming genius added the final part to that phrase: the _clean_ mission _report_ from _Kakashi Hatake_. He instantly grabbed a shuriken from his pouch and lightly stabbed his arm. Upon feeling the pain and seeing the blood, he then picked up said report and eyed it carefully making sure that it was indeed Kakashi's and that it was indeed real and he wasn't currently going insane. He read every single part that could be read on the paper then turned it over looking for proof that it was real. He saw the official symbol in the top right of the paper, but then saw a neat… _letter_ addressed to him. _'W-…what?'_ He quickly read over the piece and what he read grounded him into unspeakable shock.

_Dear Iruka-sensei,_

_ I don't know why I'm writing this, but it's the only way I thought… Well, Iruka-san I wanted to apologize deeply for how I've treated you for so long. It is absolutely no way to treat a fellow shinobi and such a strong one that you were able to catch me off guard. So, I am sorry. Last time I apologized you yelled and hated me, and I completely understand if you aren't even reading this or think this is a lie to you as well. I want to tell you it is not, but I can't control your thoughts and I realize how unfairly I treated you that you would consider this me playing with you. I am not, but it is up to you to forgive me. I can't say how sorry I am, as I don't know how much I hurt you. I can only hope you forgive me and stop hating me._

_ Kakashi Hatake_

Iruka was dumbfounded as he again went over the entire letter several times and then eyed the little symbol next to the man's name. He defaced the report, but the fact that Kakashi had to result to this… Iruka shook his head unsure how to take it all. He upset the man with how he treated him the second time… He knew it was harsh, but he didn't know that it would make the man so upset. Iruka again studied the stroke marks and definitely could pick up slight shaking. _'Kami… __**I**__ should be apologizing…' _He shook his head then stealthily took the report with him, knowing he was going to make it late, but for this one time would allow it to be late. He had to find Kakashi and fix this. His mind later remarked that a jounin should be able to hide those slightest emotional strokes.

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Kakashi was a train wreck. He hadn't slept for days and just came back from a week long mission. He had to avoid the man and knew the only way was to take a mission and hide out in his home. He felt slightly bad for not visiting his former teammates, but he absolutely couldn't imagine Iruka's anger, reaction, or anything… Of course, the copy-nin wasn't scared, no. He just didn't want to deal with unnecessary emotions. Or at least that's what he kept telling himself and firmly believed it.

He sighed and got in the shower, letting the mission muck fall off him and waiting until the water was perfectly clear again. He was exhausted, so once the water was clear he quickly got out, dried himself off, and then crawled into bed intending to once again sleep until the next Ice Age. In his dire need to forget and simply rest, he also forgot he left his ninja dogs summoned. And said dogs have been _very_ concerned.

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Iruka was confused, pissed, lost, and generally angry. Of course that damn jounin wouldn't be around for Iruka to confront! Now Iruka was seriously doubting if the apology was sincere, but then again… He couldn't stop thinking of how the jounin's body language was so off and he didn't come into the mission room like any normal person. _'Was Kakashi… nervous?...' _ Iruka scoffed at the idea but couldn't help but think that it could be possible.

'_But… why would Kakashi be nervous to give me this?... And such a nice report! It even bested __**Gai's**__! __Of course, I consider "manly sparkles of success" a negative thing to cover mission reports in,__ but… It is Gai-san of all people. His mission reports are immaculate if you take off the sparkles!' _Iruka sighed, completely stressed with this single man.

'_Why is it that you stress me out so much Kakashi? Granted you're an annoying selfish bastard, but I usually can ignore those people. I even ignore Gai-san… but something about you makes me more angry than usual. Something about your cocky half-ass smile gets me like no other…'_ Iruka grumbled to himself, also completely annoyed at the man. _'You __**would**__ confuse me… bastard…'._

Iruka sighs yet again and rubs his forehead in a stressed manner. "Where are you?" He mumbles aloud and shakes his head. "Damn it Kakashi-san… why are you suddenly gone from the face of the Earth?" He sighed knowing he had to talk to Asuma about this. He was the most sensible of all jounin and knew the most about Kakashi. Or at least Iruka was pretty sure of that…

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"So you're saying Kakashi apologized to you again?" Asuma asked surprised.

'_Damn… He must be worse off than I thought… Now that I think about it I haven't seen him around for a long time…'_ Asuma ignored the flicker of worry he felt at that fact. He knew Kakashi went on a mission recently, but he was unaware if Kakashi was able to handle a mission and ignore distractions too. Not to mention he wasn't sure if the man was back or not anyway. He returned to listening to Iruka, smirking at how they seemed to be becoming better friends than he expected.

"Yeah, and then he up and leaves for who knows how long as soon as he gave me that damn report!"

"Wait, you haven't seen him since?"

"No… why do you ask?" Iruka asked, suspicion surfacing.

"Kuso… I heard he left on a mission recently but he should have been back by now."

Iruka's eyes widened in worry.

'_Shimatta!* Why did I say that? Gah, stupid!'_ Asuma thought in panic. He should have known better than to tell the already worry prone chuunin. But, the damage was done.

"Yeah, sorry Iruka. I'm sure he's fine." Asuma gave his best comforting smile he could muster and idly wandered if he should tell Kurenai everything… But he decided against it. No need to drag in more people to the drama of Hatake Kakashi.

"Yo! Are you Iruka-sensei?" a gruff voice called from behind Iruka. The chuunin only turned around and looked inquisitively at the ninja dogs.

"Yes?"

"You want the brat right?" Pakkun asked. In which Iruka only blushed, but then nodded, assuming these nin-dogs meant Kakashi. It'd make sense as they used the same word the hokage uses all the time.

"We'll help you find him."

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*****Shimatta is a possible way to say "shit" but it has other translations too. Review please!

**A/N:** Yup! Cliff hanger! MUAHAHAHAH! *hands out cookies to all reviewers*. PM thoughts if you wish. I received no anonymous reviews, so sadly I can't reply to anything. : (

And, I'm sure you guessed by now what next chapter is gonna be… *giggles evilly with Rodrigo* For those who can't foreshadow and figure things out; CONFRONTATION! MUAHAHAHA!

P.S: Ryuno-chu is the sexiest, most bitchin' beta alive. Love her. She made this chapter possible.


	8. The Flicker of Warmth

**A/N: **Did I torture you? ;P I think I did. MUAHAHAHAH! I'm sorry. I just couldn't help it. Heh-heh-heh. ^w^ ANYWAY! Sooo yeah. This is chapter 8. It's awesome. It's long-awaited. It's where Kaka- *Rodrigo shoots author then growls viciously at almost spoiler*

**Warnings: **Insane rabid plot bunny in which tortures author, and see past chapters.

**Disclaimer:** Remember that small scene in which Kakashi and Iruka are sitting together on that bench? In the anime? Yeah. I wrote that. I own it.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT! I didn't even tell Masashi to write it. I just begged like a sad whore. (Soooo worth it!) In other words: I OWN NOTHING DAMMIT! :brokenheart:

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"We can help you." Iruka stared wide-eyed at the dogs. _'Damned mutts and super-hearing… wait, how much do they know? Have they told Kakashi anything?'_ Iruka's eyes widened and his heart began beating a bit faster.

"Relax, sensei. We don't care and we said nothing. We came searching for you actually…" Pakkun trailed off, then continued. "My name is Pakkun by the way, sensei. I'm one of Kakashi's ninken."

Iruka only nodded and briefly wondered how luck just turned for him. At least now he was pretty sure Kakashi-san wasn't avoiding him. Well, wasn't in Konoha and avoiding him as best as possible. Iruka hummed in thought as he looked out the window.

"Iruka, you do have company," Asuma commented then laughed softly. Iruka instantly turned around and started spewing apologies and pretty being his usual overly-nice self while blushing surprisingly deeply.

"Relax, I was just teasing you, Iruka." Iruka then huffed and sighed in defeat, turning his attention to the dogs. Namely the disturbingly large one that could easily eat him whole.

"Why were you looking for me?" Iruka asked the small dog, assuming he was the leader of sorts.

"Um… How about we go somewhere private to talk, sensei?" He mumbled, then hopped off of Bull and exited the restaurant trailed by the other dogs, and finally Iruka.

"See you tomorrow Asuma-sa… Asuma!" Iruka shouted behind him then continued following the dogs.

"Where are we going?"

"Well, we said we were going to help you find him."

Iruka nodded, "yeah?"

"So we're taking you to his apartment." The dog said simply, and matter-of-factly.

Iruka then sputtered and stopped. "I-I can't go there! I am unwelcome… I-I don't know him… I don't think he'd appreciate me barging in on him. It's his home!"

"Apartment." Pakkun automatically corrected, and then only stared at the teacher trying to figure out why it was such a big deal to enter someone's "home". He then spoke up, "okay then. See ya' Iruka."

Iruka was confused at the correction, but then sputtered again at the immediate dismissal. "W-what? But I've been waiting all week to talk to him and this may be my only chance to-" Iruka then glared at the dogs realizing the game they just used on him as he used it on his students all the time. "Fine. Just show me his apartment."

The dogs nodded and continued on their trot, heading to a complex somewhere near the mission room and Hokage's tower. _'Most logical place for a jounin to be …'_ Iruka idly thought. He continued following but when they didn't just point out which room or number was Kakashi's, Iruka frowned, confused. They then entered the complex and Iruka growled softly realizing Kakashi's dogs were just as dull and difficult as him. He followed inside grudgingly. He knew he didn't need to, but he could place blame on the dogs should problems ever arise in his brief visit. That, and as much as he hated to say it, he _was_ curious.

They eventually arrived at the door and Iruka nodded then turned to leave. But heard something behind him. Upon turning back around, he saw Pakkun banging _very_ loudly on the door. "YO! BRAT! OPEN UP!"

"What are you doing? I don't want to talk to him right now!" Iruka squeaked in surprise.

But it was far too late. Surely Kakashi would open the door now. But after a while passed Iruka blinked wandering what was taking so long. _'Surely… he heard that…? '_ But the dog was then joined by his companions who all banged on the door if possible, harder and yelled _louder_. _'He has to be dead if he doesn't hear that!'_ But upon the extended silence Iruka began panicking. Was he attacked? Poisoned? But the dogs shook their head and sighed like they expected it.

"Come on Iruka, nothing is going to wake him up. He is more exhausted than he ever has been. It was a difficult mission…" Pakkun said, but Iruka caught a glint of the truth being hidden. He'd have to ask later. It also didn't make sense that Kakashi would have such a hard time. Week long missions usually are simple... "Is he okay? He should have had an easy time with that mission right?" They nodded, but Iruka couldn't tell what too. He sighed figuring they had their reasons for keeping Kakashi's current state from him.

"What now then?" Inner Iruka breathed a sigh of relief at not having to face the man while taking a mental picture of the man's apartment door. He knew where Kakashi was now, so he could easily talk to him when the man was conscious.

"Uh… you'll have to come back later. Likely tomorrow or the day after… He's really tired…" Pakkun said. _'He's not just tired… this most recent mission was very difficult… damned baka* being so distracted all because of this chuunin...'_ The dog sighs and starts walking out of the complex, followed by Iruka while the other ninken poof away.

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Today was the day. Kakashi was still un-seen, but Iruka knew –based on what Pakkun told him— that the jounin was simply hiding out and resting in his home. However, Pakkun also told him that he had to talk to the jounin today. He wasn't sure why, but he sighed knowing he wanted too anyway. He desperately needed to understand Kakashi and if he really did mean it. He wanted to know a lot actually, and that surprised him.

So after he dismissed his class, he then went home and freshened up a bit. After a lot of personal conflict he finally steeled his nerve and purposefully charged his way to the jounin's apartment complex. Upon arriving at the door of the building though, his resolve flickered and he almost walked away. But then he remembered the dog's words; _"I am in no right to tell you anything about the brat, but I can say he needs someone, and you should at least talk to him…"_. Iruka sighed, and finally made his way to the jounin's apartment itself, taking one step at a time.

The door seemed surprisingly imposing this time. He stood out there for a little while, then finally sighed and lifted his fist to knock, but then the door opened. Iruka froze and stared wide-eyed at the masked jounin wearing only his uniform pants and a towel around his neck. His hair appeared damp, and his eyes were in the signature upside down "u". He finally said cheerily;

"Good evening Iruka-sensei, what brings you here?"

Iruka's quickly brightening blush was his only response to the question. Kakashi then dropped his act and said rather tonelessly,

"Care to come in?"

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The jounin knew he was trapped. He could've easily left his apartment through the window, but that would be rude and Iruka was sure to notice anyway. He briefly wandered how the academy teacher found his apartment, but sighed and opened the door anyway. Might as well get Iruka's raving hate speech out of the way as fast as possible. But as he let the chuunin in he couldn't help but notice his eyes widen amusingly largely and he wandered what the man saw that made him so surprised.

'_No wonder Pakkun corrected me… this apartment really isn't a home. It's immaculate, and there is not one touch of personalization anywhere…'_ Iruka thought mildly. _'The man surely must be lonely in this cold white apartment…'_

"S-sorry… Kakashi-san… for intruding like this…" Iruka began, but then trailed off, the awkwardness of the situation sapping all confidence he had.

Kakashi wasn't any better off, the man's presence in his _apartment_ instantly threw him on edge, add to the fact he hasn't faced him since he gave the man his report… Kakashi's heart was beginning to beat uncomfortably again. He knew it couldn't be healthy… And he suddenly felt extremely, and uncomfortably exposed as he was only wearing his pants and mask. No one he could ever recall has seen so much of his body outside of the hospital. No one important… He began fidgeting and looking around uncomfortably, finding a crack on the wall to be extremely interesting.

Iruka found an equally interesting crack on the wall too, and avoided eyeing Kakashi.

"U-uh… Nice… weather… we're having…?" Iruka began slowly, and -he noticed himself- painfully awkwardly.

"Yeah…"

"So… You're apartment looks clean…?" Iruka mentally face-palmed at how ridiculous the attempt at conversation was.

"It's easy to keep clean since I'm not here often…"

"Oh…"

For some reason the crack suddenly got _very _interesting, and Iruka coughed a bit awkwardly.

"Kakashi-sa-"

"Please don't. I don't need to hear you hate me still."

Iruka put his hand on Kakashi's bare shoulder and finally looked at him and smiled. He knew what to say now. "I don't hate you… IF." Kakashi flinched, but the smile hooked his eyes and his heart began beating faster than it was at the mission room. He felt hope blossom in his chest.

"If what…?"

"You mean what you said in your apology...-apologies." Iruka corrected then let go of Kakashi's shoulder while flashing him a shy smile. He couldn't believe he was just so straight-forward with this strange jounin. After so many weeks of avoiding and being angry with him, and the man himself didn't know what he was doing wrong. The guilt of how unfair he's been to Kakashi hit him all at once, and he very hesitantly and equally, -briefly- hugged Kakashi.

"I'm sorry I've been so unfair, Kakashi-san." He then let go and stepped away, blushing an interesting shade of red.

As Iruka hugged Kakashi, the man froze solid. He was being touched. By Iruka. He was being _hugged_. By _Iruka_. He couldn't breathe and could only stare straight ahead. It's been so long since he'd been touched, much less hugged. The last time he could remember being hugged was by Rin, his old teammate when he was first promoted to jounin. After quite a long while of staring at Iruka he shook his head realizing Iruka apologized to him. For being unfair? But wasn't he at fault…? He was about to ask but what came out instead was,

"Why did you do that?"

Iruka only blushed vibrantly, and then stuttered out an answer.

"Because… I… felt bad… for how I treated you. I-I… I um, I… was wrong. You were unaware of what you were doing wrong and I didn't realize this until now…" Kakashi laughed inwardly at how much Iruka resembled a bright, bleeding, tomato. But his reasoning grounded Kakashi. He couldn't think...

"You're so kind Iruka-sensei…" He unintelligibly mumbled.

Iruka blushed even brighter and nodded unsure what to say. Kakashi on the other hand, was very, very, very, confused. But, at the same time, he realized he was equally happy. He couldn't understand this situation. He had no idea what to do or say. But Iruka was smiling and didn't hate him anymore. He couldn't be happier for that.

Unable to understand the situation, he mimicked Iruka and very shyly hugged Iruka himself. He didn't know if he was doing it right, but Iruka froze a bit, then Kakashi felt arms loosely hug him back. He couldn't help but smile.

"You don't hate me?"

"No Kakashi-san. But I must request you stop hugging me…"

Kakashi instantly let go and to his surprise felt his cheeks warm up considerably. Is this what blushing was? Iruka then coughed again, and looked around the empty and void apartment.

"Sorry to have intruded upon your time and home."

"Apartment," Kakashi automatically corrected, but then realized Iruka was about to leave "wait Iruka-san!" He half-shouted and half-whispered.

Iruka froze and looked back at Kakashi, perplexed. "What?"

"I… don't know…"

Iruka smiled, and decided to simply stand and await a proper response. Kakashi was unsure why he stopped the man and only smiled in his trademark way, trying to go with what he thought could be the right answer.

"Thank you Iruka-sensei." He said. He couldn't deny the intense feeling of lightness and this strange bubbly feeling in his stomach. He only smiled, and knew that this one was genuine; his eye wasn't closed.

Iruka blushed a bit, then nodded, bowed, and left quickly. As he was walking down the hall he couldn't help but worry at how Kakashi's apartment was not a home at all… And he entertained the idea of inviting Kakashi to his house for lunch or dinner… He knew now the man was seriously damaged, and he wanted to understand him more…

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Kakashi leaned heavily on the door with his back, and let out a huge sigh. He then lightly banged his head on the door. "I don't understand this…" he mumbled aloud. _'Why did I hug him? I know I was very happy, but surely there was some other way to express what I was feeling? Then again… he didn't seem to mind much at all… I wander if he would if he knew the real me… No one has liked the real me. I stopped letting people see glimpses of it.' _Kakashi sighed in thought and watched the plain ceiling of his apartment. Was it just him, or did the ceiling seem to be brighter? _'Well, no matter… '._

Iruka actually apologized to _him_, and realized he was unaware of what he was doing. He actually hugged him _first_. Iruka no longer hated him. That final realization made him stand up and smile very happily. He decided that today he'd turn in his report. Kakashi's gaze darkened, however, as he remembered _this_ report was going to get him looked at. He took many more risks than necessary, and got wounded more than normal. Kakashi sighed, and realized he was already wanting to see Iruka again. It was strange, but the man finally showed him a small amount of that warmth he'd been wanting... And he wanted to see if he could get more. With that he eagerly got fully dressed, and headed down to the mission room.

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**A/N:** WOOOOOO! FINALLY OUT AND AWESOME! I hope you guys liked it. I feel like I failed in some way on it. Do you see why I did, if I did? Um, still no anonymous reviews… But oh well. Last chapter got the most reviews of all! If I did not fail as horribly as I think I may have, I will say I am quite pleased with this chapter. Sooo yeah. That's fun… Reviews are Rodrigo's fuel to torture me into updating more and faster.

P.S: LOVE THE GODLY RYUNO-CHU! And Rodrigo. He's the director of this 'lil play here. Gotta' love bunnies…

Ciao!


	9. New Beginnings

**A/N:** I TOLD YOU I'D GET IT OUT THIS WEEKEND! YOSH! (Although it was barely in the nick of time...) Hello again. I am as pleased as you I'm back. I even came of my own free will. *laughs sheepishly and Rodrigo is holding a katana to the author's back and Ryuno-chu has Rock Lee under her possession to smite the author at will* I promise!... Eh-heh… Well, um glad you liked last chapter. It's super exciting and I'm almost to the 50th review! You people are so amazing! So I have decided; if I get 100 reviews, the one hundredth reviewer get's their very own KakaxIru one-shot! PM me the story you'd like to see. I'd love to reward that review. Heck, I may even be convinced to write a one-shot for that lucky 50th reviewer. *wink and nudge* Do you guys want that? Tell me in a review. ;P

**Warnings: **The fact there are warnings and you are on chapter 9 should say enough…

**Disclaimer: **Yada-yada-blah, I don't own nuttin'. *Rodrigo growls ever more dangerously* 'cept him. *eeps*

I also apologize for the length… though I can't see it as a bad thing…

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'_Today's the day… I'm going to ask Kakashi-san over to my house…'_ A tanned chuunin was thinking silently as he stared at the seemingly imposing door to Kakashi's apartment. It took a while, exactly three weeks and nine hours to be exact, but Iruka finally wanted the man out of his damned "home". Everytime Kakashi came to the mission room he looked steadily, and increasingly more worse for the wear. Iruka was pretty sure it was his imagination but his imagination made him worry about the man. And Kakashi going "home" to his apartment was making Iruka feel guilty. He wasn't sure why, but he was feeling steadily more guilty just the same way as Kakashi looked worse.

As Iruka continued to stare at the imposing door he couldn't help but feel that Kakashi really should get the menacing aura of said door looked at. It's not like the door was going to attack him or anything, but still… As the thoughts raced through Iruka's head he couldn't help but remember how their brief interactions were in the mission room now. Kakashi stopped rudely teasing him altogether, and they shared a warm "welcome back" smile everytime he stepped into the mission room. For Kakashi, he was welcoming Konoha and Iruka back into his fragile existence, and Iruka was simply happy for Kakashi to be unharmed.

But… as time went on Iruka remembered Kakashi seemed to have no one that cared about him. And 'thus his guilt built up everytime the jounin was forced to go back to his apartment. Iruka knew he had to help, and Pakkun's words kept echoing in his mind at the most inept of times. _'He needs someone…'_ Iruka sighed, _'well, might as well get this over with…' _he then knocked on the jounin's door.

Said door opened harmlessly, revealing a fully uniformed and masked Kakashi. "I was wandering when you'd knock Iruka-san." He said teasingly. Iruka only smiled and blushed as he seemed to be found in the middle of knocking yet again.

"H-hello, Kakashi-san."

"Yo."

"Uhm…"

Iruka trailed off, unsure of where to go from there. _'How do I ask him to come to dinner at my house?... It's just so awkward as we don't know each other yet already have so much history…"_

"Something on your mind Iruka-san?" Kakashi asked formally, breaking the chuunin's train of thought.

"Y-yes… Um,… I was wondering…" Iruka began.

Kakashi's heart sped up a bit. He knew he enjoyed this man's presence a lot, and he made coming back from missions worth it. Just to see that smile everytime. The fact he was wondering about something that entailed him visiting Kakashi made him anxious to know _what_ he was wondering about.

"Yeah?"

"Uhm…" _'Why can't I just spit it out and ask? What's so wrong with this that I find it so hard to do?'_ an inner voice answered him that it was because he knew if he did his solitary life would be significantly changed. But he ignored that bitch of an inner self and just blurted it out as fast as he could.

"WOULDYOULIKE TO HAVEDINNERATMYPLACE?" Kakashi stared. First at why this teacher blushed so much, and then as to what he tried to say.

"Um, what?" he asked unintelligibly.

Iruka, in turn, banged his head against the door frame and tried again; slowly, and painfully.

"I said… Would you… like to have dinner at… my… place?..."

Oh. That's why Kakashi's heart started beating that fast… It made sense now. Damned chuunin breaking his shell and making Kakashi like him… Inner Kakashi sighed and confronted the question. This was, as far as Kakashi's knowledge went, an offer of formal friendship. It made no sense. Why would Iruka want to be friends with someone as despicable as him? But that warmth… Maybe Kakashi could be selfish, just once. Maybe he deserved a chance to try. But he knew he was treading some very dangerous territory. He wasn't sure he wanted anyone to know even a small part of his true self. It was too grotesque to let someone like Iruka see… But maybe Iruka wouldn't pry… The man did seem different… Kakashi sighed at his internal battle then realized Iruka was narrowing his eyes… Crap… He should say something.

"Uh… yeah…" he managed. Then blinked in surprise. Did he mean to say that?... Damn tongue slipping… Oh well. But for some reason his heart kept beating quickly. With Iruka, it does that often. He didn't like it as it made him feel as if he was poisoned. He realized he was sweating too. Maybe he really was… crap.

But then Iruka smiled kindly and Kakashi realized he said the right thing. He wanted to spend more time with the chuunin. Desperately. That warmth and friendship was addicting. But he sighed knowing he had no idea what to do. He sometimes hated having a twisted childhood. He wouldn't be so impaired like this if he didn't.

"Oh! Um… great… Uh… Kakashi-san?"

"Yeah?"

"What would you like to eat?"

"Um… Ichiraku?"

Iruka sighed realizing that the jounin probably never had a home-cooked meal in his life. He was also wandering just what was so effed up with this man. From what he could recall he was the Silver Fang's child, so maybe… Iruka sighed again, realizing this strange friendship was going to take some time.

"Kakashi, what's your favorite food?"

Said man blinked, confused. Why would Iruka ask that? He was a ninja, and journeymen ninja don't get paid much. That, and he shouldn't even have time to select "favorite" foods. A ninja's favorite food was a luxury, and he didn't exactly have luxuries in his life. But he remembered one thing he found absolutely delicious.

"Miso Soup with Eggplant." He was still confused why Iruka sighed, but he answered that question anyway.

"Alright. I'll drag you to my apartment around 6:30." Iruka said simply, with a smile. Kakashi couldn't help but smile back, affected by Iruka's kindness. He had no idea what was going on, but once again he couldn't really complain. Iruka was his friend again, he got him back somehow, and Iruka wanted to make it mutual.

"Alright sensei." Kakashi winked, then looked around unsure what to do next.

"Um… I'll be going now. See you tonight." Iruka said, then started walking off.

"Wait! Uhm…" he couldn't figure out why he stopped the man yet again.

"Um… are you sure?" he finished lamely.

Iruka only rolled his eyes and nodded, then waved goodbye with a smile. Kakashi couldn't help but feel satisfied with that and found that he couldn't wait for the man to come back. He wandered what he should wear, and eventually decided to wear his normal uniform. The man shouldn't expect anything different, and they were comfortable. So with that he hummed softly and closed the door, waiting. He noticed his heart was still a few beats above average, and he contributed it to his nervousness.

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Iruka sighed as he walked towards the apartment complex that was Kakashi's "home" the location was quickly becoming engrained in his mind. He couldn't shake how nervous he was that someone else was starting to come into his life, and it was about to happen with Iruka's abrupt dinner plans. Iruka sighed again as he noticed the door to Kakashi's apartment looked more imposing than usual. _'Kakashi-san seriously needs to fix that…'_ he thought idly as he knocked on it. To his surprise it didn't open right away. As soon as he was about to knock again, the man opened his door.

"Hi Iruka-san. You're a little early…"

Iruka blushed and frowned a bit. "Is that a problem?"

The man laughed softly, "no Iruka-sensei. It's not. It's actually 6:30 now."

Iruka rolled his eyes realizing he was only a minute early. "Shall we go?" he asked, then turned around expecting to hear the click and closing of the door behind him. When he did hear it, he started walking and hummed to himself. When Kakashi appeared at his side reading his Icha Icha, Iruka sighed and decided to ignore it and enjoy walking home with a…_ friend_? No, acquaintance was better in his mind.

He already started the food and intended to have it out by 7:00, but 6:45 was his goal to beat his own cooking time and ability. That, and he was unsure what to do with the man in his house waiting around for 30 minutes. It was only then he realized that his house was 15 minutes away from Kakashi's apartment and he sighed realizing he wasn't gonna beat his time today. He shrugged it off and decided to focus on this strange companionship being formed as they walked. He knew things were changing with each step and found he didn't mind at all.

"Kakashi-san, must you read that when company is around?"

"Uh… sorry Iruka-sensei. I don't really know what to talk about though. I thought you wouldn't mind."

Iruka sighed again and just continued walking. They were approaching Iruka's apartment complex at the moment and he figured the man did have a point. So as Iruka finally opened his much less imposing door and signaled Kakashi to enter he found that it was suddenly quite awkward. As he closed the door behind him and both he and Kakashi took off their shoes, he finally stated his strange feelings.

"Um, I've never had company before Kakashi-san, forgive me."

But Kakashi wasn't paying attention to the chuunin. He was stunned at what he saw in this man's _house_. It was warm, personal, and felt welcoming. He found he liked it much better than his cold apartment. There were well-worn books on a few small tables, tests and other papers on the coffee table, and pictures in several places. Some of his past students, others of his new ones, and Kakashi was surprised to see that his old squad picture with Naruto, Sakura, and Sasuke was included in these pictures. Everything was just so personal and unique… He felt like he was intruding, and found that he suddenly felt uncomfortable.

"Are you sure this is okay, Iruka-san? I feel…" He couldn't quite express it, that and he didn't really want to tell Iruka.

Iruka in turn only glared at him and lightly smacked his head, "idiot. You are already in my home, so make yourself at home. I'm not turning you away."

And with that Iruka left to go finish the food. Kakashi only rubbed the back of his head surprised Iruka just did that. Maybe he really was Iruka's friend. He found he liked the affectionate contact. Though he felt like a student himself which he didn't really appreciate. As for making himself at home, he had no idea what to do and felt like it was wrong to do it. After all he didn't even have a home himself. So with that he decided to just lean on the counter of the kitchen and read. He smelt something that seemed suspiciously close to that Miso soup and egg plant. His favorite. Intrigued, he watched Iruka take off a delicious smelling mixture from the stove and once he knew what it was from his keen sense of smell he was shocked. Both that Iruka made it, had the time to cook, and cooked for _him_. It made something inside him warm considerably.

"Thank you," he said, smiling warmly. He felt very good now and found it ever more enticing. He also decided this was something he could easily look forward to more often, and suddenly felt like he belonged in the apartment. At least to some point. He stared at the apron the chuunin was wearing and simply took in the man. The man who's heart was kind enough to accept everyone. Even someone he used to hate. And not only accept, but take in and become friends. He knew they should be far apart based simply on position and their own respective friends, but this chuunin took it upon himself to be Kakashi's friend. He didn't want to be a pity case, but he knew Iruka meant his kindness as much as anyone.

Kakashi smiled again and only then realized Iruka said something.

"What?"

"I said you're welcome. "

"Oh. Well again, thank you Iruka-san. I appreciate you inviting me. I've never been in anyone else's home. Well, except to assassinate them, but-" he cut off his sentence and froze, looking up to see Iruka's reaction at his accidental spill. _'Stupid…'_ he thought. Iruka in turn only raised an eyebrow and shrugged.

"It's a job isn't it? Don't act so worried. I understand you're a high-ranking ninja." Iruka said simply but he realized Kakashi really did have zero social skills. Which in turn made him sigh. At least the man seemed to relax a bit in his apartment. He felt awkward having such a stone-faced Kakashi in his home. It didn't seem right.

"Well, the food is ready Kakashi-san," Iruka told him. He then took off his apron, got some for himself, then served some to Kakashi. He then sat down and started eating. Kakashi in turn was unsure of what to do. He decided he should eat his normal fast way but before he could start, Iruka spoke up.

"Don't swallow your food. I promise I won't look until you're done. If you don't believe me then I'll turn around and eat."

Kakashi could only stare, shocked. Iruka didn't want to know one of Konoha's greatest mysteries? Only a few people at Ichiraku have seen it, and he made them promise not to tell. Of course they themselves said they wouldn't say anything under torture. He scoffed mentally at that time because they had no idea what torture was. Regardless, he was shocked Iruka didn't want to see. He felt suspicious though and couldn't help but ask; "why?".

Iruka in turn rolled his eyes and paused in his consumption. "Idiot. Because I know you have your own personal reasons not to show people what's underneath that mask. I respect who you are Kakashi, and that's that." He then promptly resumed his eating and turned around.

Kakashi was frozen. _'Did you just say that?...'_ Iruka actually cared… He wasn't a tool in this man's eyes. He suddenly felt a grin break out on his face and he absorbed this happy feeling. _'If this is what being cared for is like I don't want it to stop…'_ he thought idly. He was unsure if Iruka meant it, but if he did it meant a lot more than the chuunin would know. "Thank you." He said simply, yet warmly. He then slipped his mask down very uncomfortably, but then dug into his meal loving the taste of it. _'Delicious…'_

"Wow Iruka-san, you make very, very, very, good food." He couldn't stop his strange sense of happiness beginning to envelop him all night it seemed. He was actually able to enjoy his food for once. So much so he was already done.

He took this opportunity to watch Iruka. Simply just watch. He knew you learned a lot about people if you just watch them closely. The fact he was a genius made this even easier. He knew his early assassination missions wouldn't have been possible if he didn't use his talent for watching people. He noticed Iruka put slightly less pressure on his upper back then his lower back. He wondered why briefly, but then he saw the several small but noticeable scars on the tops of his wrist, one very long one obviously from a thrown kunai, and several more rough nearly microscopic scars on his hands. He knew it was either from paper cuts or very close calls with Kunai. He remembered the chuunin taught children and it was likely from their mishaps. He actually felt a bit bad for Iruka, but he continued watching intently.

Every small move seemed slower than normal to Kakashi, the graceful way he brought the spoon towards his mouth though made him realize this chuunin was very deliberate and precise. Either from perfect timing catching a kid or perhaps training… Kakashi sighed knowing the teacher _was_ still out of touch simply from his relaxed pace. Ninja need to react in less than one second, one millisecond for ANBU. Iruka was able to pin the copy-nin in a matter of seconds though. So this made him realize that anger actually helped Iruka. Emotion was beneficial to the chuunin… This realization made him question procedures in the ninja world, but then he decided Iruka was a special case. That, and it'd be hell to try and change anything now. Damn elders…

"Kakashi-san, may I ask why you're watching me so closely?" Iruka deadpanned. He didn't turn around, but the gaze on his back lasted far too long. He felt like he was prey being examined for meatiness.

Kakashi in turn got shocked out of his stupor and almost fell out his chair like a pre-genin. He quickly recovered and coughed awkwardly. "Um…" he somehow felt saying that he was watching Iruka to get to know him was the wrong thing to say. He also felt an "I don't know" would result in his castration.

"Because… I… find… you… interesting?" yeah that seemed better.

"You know Kakashi-san; you usually talk to people if you want to get to know them…" Iruka said, exasperated. He realized he'd have to try harder than he does with his students to actually talk with this man.

"Are you done Kakashi-san? I'm turning around." He said simply, then did just that and saw an evenly masked Kakashi who looked like a kicked puppy. Iruka actually found it a bit cute.

"I'm sorry, Iruka-sensei. I just don't know what to say. The food was very good though. I've never been cooked for before… It was very nice…" Iruka smiled at that and nodded.

"Come anytime. Just tell me before you do." He only then realized he _just_ said that instead of continuing to question the man. Well that didn't work well… Kakashi only stared wide-eyed.

"Really…?" he asked, unwilling to believe Iruka offered his friendship on an 'anytime you want' basis.

"Well, I have other friends… and don't spend ALL your time with me. You need to do other things besides that, but aside from that yeah." Iruka said with a warm smile, causing Kakashi to smile back very sincerely. Again his eye was open this time.

He had Iruka's friendship. He felt like a weight lifted off his shoulders he didn't even know was there. He then relaxed a bit. "Um, Iruka-san, thank you for everything today. I appreciate it a lot." He said. He noticed it sounded a bit too formal even for him. But he meant it and needed to show it.

"So… what are you willing to tell me now Kakashi-san?" Iruka asked, trying to start conversation.

"What do you mean sensei?"

"Just tell me about yourself. I know there's more to you than the porn-reading late jounin. You could even start with that Sharingan eye thing. Forgive me if I'm overstepping. Just curious."

"Hum… well,…" Kakashi found he didn't really mind telling Iruka a lot of things for some reason.

"My eye came from when I first became a jounin. I was cocky as I made it at such an early age and that ended up leading my team to irreparable danger. I was very headstrong and considered the rules of a Konoha shinobi my own personal near-religion. I lived my life for the rules as my father died due to not following these rules… One of my team members, Rin, got captured and my other teammate, Obito, refused to move on without saving her."

Iruka nodded, beginning to be engrossed into the story, and surprised he even had the privilege to hear it.

"As you can imagine I intended to force him to complete the mission first, but he refused to listen," Kakashi chuckled softly "he even punched me; a nice solid blow… I remember what I told him: 'A shinobi needs tools suitable to the mission at hand. Emotion is just a useless burden.' and then he said something that I remember to this day… 'Sure, in a ninja's world, those who violate the rules and fail to follow orders are lower than garbage. However… those who do not care for and support their fellows are even lower than that!'"

Iruka's eyes widened involuntarily as he remembered Naruto saying something like that one time. But he kept silent seeing Kakashi was remembering a painful time.

"That changed me for a while, but not more than an hour after he said that he died. I lost my eye while we were fighting a rock ninja with camouflage jutsu. But I was okay with Rin's med kit. We then saved her but Obito sacrificed himself to save me… He gave me his Sharingan eye… and that's how I got it. Not many people know how I got it so consider yourself lucky."

Kakashi laughed softly again as Iruka and the hokages were the only ones that actually knew, then continued, "I lost so many important people I felt like I was the one being spared all the time. I lost myself and can hardly remember any years past that… I knew I was just good at my job. I got the legendary titles for some reason, eh?" Kakashi laughed humorlessly realizing he revealed a lot more than he intended but for some reason couldn't see it as a bad thing. Iruka wordlessly patted his shoulder and Kakashi knew it to be a silent "I'm sorry". He resisted the urge to shake it off as he didn't like pity. He didn't deserve it. The lives he took did…

After a long silence, Iruka sighed and looked at the time. "It's late Kakashi-san. You should go home and sleep and rest. It seems like you could use it." Kakashi then frowned as he realized that meant going "home" to his apartment. Not a real home. Iruka's house was a real home. But he didn't voice his opposition. He probably spent far too much of the chuunin's time anyway. He only stiffly nodded and walked towards the door, putting on his shoes.

"Thank you very much for the food Iruka-sensei. I hope we can do this again."

Iruka only nodded, paused, and then gave Kakashi a brief hug. The man froze unused to contact and restriction of the body, but he smiled after Iruka let go. "Thank you…" He said more sincerely, then opened the door and headed out, waving goodbye to the chuunin. Iruka watched until the man was out of sight, then closed the door and began cleaning, wondering how it could already be an hour till midnight.

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As Kakashi walked home, he stared at the bright moon and found he enjoyed it. This walk was pleasant; the cool breeze making it comfortable and the silence very calming. Iruka was an interesting change to his life and he smiled as he found he enjoyed it far more. The only downside was that his missions were becoming increasingly difficult. He had been very distracted because he wanted to talk to the chuunin more than just those mission room visits. He needed to be talked to and perhaps laugh with Iruka. He was depressed their possible friendship was going nowhere, and it took a toll on his work. But being the legendary copy-ninja few would be able to tell if he was ever having difficulty. All the difficulty was worth it though when Iruka welcomed him back to Konoha. And now that he actually cemented that their friendship was definitely there, he was sure he'd have an even better time now.

Eventually the man arrived at his apartment and as he swung open his door he remembered that it was cold and didn't matter whether or not he was there. With that he sighed and decided to simply go to sleep. Kakashi took off his shirt, kicked off his uniform pants, then slid into the covers. His bed was as cold as the apartment and he wandered if he should have asked Iruka if he could stay. The only problem was he had no idea how to ask. He wanted to ask if he could sleep with Iruka, but even his social wreck part of his mind knew that wasn't right. Especially since Iruka was male! Kakashi hardly even liked males. Why else would he read Icha Icha?

Kakashi sighed in his bed. He really did not want to be here, but he fell asleep -with trouble- anyway.

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Kakashi was staring at him intently. Too intently. "May I help you Kakashi-san?" Iruka asked, and then looked around to see if they were attracting a lot of unnecessary attention. Thankfully they weren't and Iruka was able to slip out of the assignment room without mishap.

"May I ask why you wanted to speak with me Kakashi-san?"

"Um…" suddenly his confidence drained. Well that was unusual.

"I was… ah…" He realized he sounded a lot like Iruka did when the man asked him to join him for dinner. He rubbed the back of his neck and sighed. Then looked everywhere but Iruka's face.

"I was wandering if you wanted to join me for lunch?..." He finally asked, though it was a bit awkward. Iruka eyed him strangely but then nodded.

"Sure."

Kakashi smiled and found he was blushing again… strange. Iruka smiled knowingly. "Is that pink I see above your mask?" he asked playfully. The jounin's eyes widened and he shook his head fervently, only to find that his cheeks were very warm.

"Oh my Kakashi, now it's red!" Iruka teased.

Kakashi in turn only looked down on the ground and shyly rubbed the back of his neck. _'Crap… He wasn't supposed to notice…'_ He'd never been caught blushing before, and found that he was even more embarrassed Iruka was able to catch him. But upon reflection he realized he wouldn't want anyone else but Iruka to find out. Kami-forbid his _fangirls _learn he blushes…

Iruka only smiled and playfully patted Kakashi's shoulders. "Sorry Kakashi-san, but it was such a great opportunity!" Kakashi only sighed completely unsure of what to do or say in response. He had no idea what to do as friends. But he was completely happy Iruka accepted without hesitation.

"I don't know how to do this Iruka-kun, but I'm happy." He said simply, his normal upside down "u" smile in place. He then wandered if it was okay he just used a slightly more familiar honorific.

Iruka didn't seem to mind as he just looked at Kakashi in a confused manner, but with a slight smile, "what do you mean by 'this', Kakashi?"

"Friendship," he said simply.

Iruka only responded by frowning. Kakashi saw pity in his eyes and he was about to get angry, but then he caught, _'understanding?'_ In there too. _'What's your story, Iruka-kun?'_

"Well, I'll teach you. Where are we eating?"

"Uh… Ichiraku?..." Kakashi asked more than stated.

"Alright. I'll see you soon then. I get off in about ten minutes. Don't wait up for me. I'll just meet you there."

Kakashi in turn nodded, then walked away humming softly with a slight smile on his face.

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He was late. As always. Iruka resisted the urge to slam his head on the counter, as it will look odd to the owner and everyone else. But he sighed realizing if he was on time it'd be considered early for him. So Iruka sighed and ordered some water, then turned around and began watching the sky. Or so he was going to until he was met with a uniform vest. He looked up to see Kakashi standing in his normal slouched manner.

"You're early."

"Only a little."

Iruka only laughed softly, rolled his eyes, then turned back around expecting to be joined by the silver-haired man. Kakashi slipped himself onto the stool next to Iruka.

"Miso Pork Ramen please."

"I'll have the same."

Iruka only rolled his eyes again and waited. Then realized Kakashi wasn't going to strike up any conversation and he smiled knowingly. "So, I never got to thank you for telling me something about yourself when you came over for dinner."

Kakashi only looked at him with a raised eyebrow, then smiled. "Oh. Well, you're welcome. I just felt like I was able to tell you something. I think you're the only friend that knows…" He hummed in thought going over a mental list of any personal details he gave to anyone that he considered his acquaintance. He knew there was no one else and he sighed realizing Iruka was his only true friend. But if he was honest with himself he'd consider that this was what was safe. He found he could trust Iruka with a lot more than anyone else as far as personal details went. And that frightened him. He didn't want Iruka to get hurt because of him. However, he remembered that he promised himself he'd do his best to protect Iruka under any circumstances and not let his selfish act endanger anyone more than usual. But it still worried him. What if he was compromised on a mission?...

"Kakashi-kun?" Kakashi broke out of his train of thoughts then shook his head.

"Sorry. What?"

"I was just asking why you chose to tell me?"

Kakashi blinked feeling like he missed something important…

"Oh. Right. Because you are the first person I could confidently say is my friend, Iruka-sensei."

Iruka's eyes widened and he only blushed then ate the conveniently arrived food. _'Why have you chosen to trust me after we had our issues?...'_ But he never voiced his worries. He looked over at the man and saw that he was already done and he rolled his eyes realizing that he probably didn't care what he got as he doesn't taste it. He somehow forgot Kakashi didn't eat like a normal person, and found that he preferred it when he did. _'I'll have to invite you again… it's obvious it took a lot for you to invite me here…'_

Iruka finally finished his delicious food and then turned to Kakashi after sighing content. "Thank you."

"No problem. I'll pay."

Iruka nodded, but a bit uncertainly. He felt bad having the man pay for both of them.

After Amane picked up the bowls and cleaned the counter, they began talking. Iruka started by asking how Naruto grew and what happened _specifically_ that lead to Sasuke leaving. Kakashi told it all with a bit of difficulty; he didn't like re-living coming upon Naruto's broken body and remembering why he failed his pupils. It was somber but then Iruka quickly lightened the mood by delving into the many tales of his teaching career. Kakashi listened intently easily seeing the passion Iruka had for his job, and found that he was glad Iruka taught at the academy. The pre-genin needed a teacher like him. He also realized Konohamaru was almost a perfect resemblance to his "eternal rival". Iruka had Kakashi listening intently and Kakashi even laughed a few times. At this moment while watching Iruka tell the stories of his "troublesome" class (or so Shikamaru labeled the kids), he realized he couldn't give this up and found a reason to come back home to the village and stay as loyal as he's been.

Eventually Iruka finished and they both realized they were talking for at least two hours.

"Oh, wow. I lost track of time Kakashi-kun."

That. That's what he missed.

"-Kun? You stopped using –san…" he realized. He felt something warm up inside of him. They were getting closer.

"Huh? O-oh… Yeah. Um…" Iruka trailed off, the signature blush brightening his cheeks as he scratched his scar lightly. Kakashi could only smile and laughed softly. Iruka looked up at him confused.

"What?"

"You blush easily Iruka-kun."

And that only caused the chuunin to blush more.

"Well, thank you very much for the lunch Kakashi-kun, but it is late and I really need to go. Papers to grade and what-not," he said simply, then stood up ready to leave.

"Oh… alright Iruka-kun," he couldn't help but feel somewhat disappointed. He wanted to be with the chuunin longer. But nonetheless he fished out the usual payment of the meal and handed it to Amane, but was stopped by Iruka's hand. He froze again, unused to physical contact especially when being constricted in any way.

"You got way too much in there Kakashi-kun!"

Kakashi only smiled in response.

"Maaa, Iruka-sensei I always pay this much. I don't need the money. And 'sides, I'm sure they lost a large amount of income from you and Naruto."

Iruka was dumb-founded, but then sighed and shook his head. It was true. But he was interested in one thing. "Are you sure you don't need that money? Weapons, food, uniforms?..."

Kakashi rolled his eyes, "I get paid a lot Iruka-kun. Don't worry." He attempted to use a 'no-nonsense' tone so the teacher would stop fighting.

Iruka sighed, then nodded as Amane took the money. "Thank you!" she said cheerfully.

Kakashi then looked at Iruka and sighed again, unsure what to do. He felt like something was in order, but a hug didn't feel right to him, neither did a handshake, or pat on the shoulder. He began panicking as he was unsure what to do. But then Iruka spoke up and helped him out before he had to decide.

"See ya' Kakashi-kun! Hope we can do this again," Iruka called out to Kakashi, smiling and waving goodbye.

'_So that's it. A wave and a smile…'_ in turn he did his signature smile and waved bye wordlessly, then cheerily turned around. He might not have any idea on how to do this, but he thought he was learning.

'_He did say he hoped to eat here again… that's good. I think we're gonna' have a good time. I never felt anything like that before… Talking and not realizing time was passing…'_ He walked to his apartment thinking of Iruka cheerfully, but unfortunately realized he was going "home" again. Alone. But upon arriving at the doorstep he saw an ANBU agent. Probably one that just came to fetch him, but sensed his chakra outside.

"Report to hokage immediately." The tone alerted Kakashi wordlessly that he had to be fully prepared. It was obviously serious.

"Understood." He found that he preferred this over staying in his empty apartment.

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Kakashi left on a mission again, Iruka heard. It was supposed to be another week long. He knew it was solo without being told. But the week was up and he intended to check on the jounin immediately. That apartment couldn't be a good place to return to where you knew nothing was waiting for you. Iruka knew he wouldn't even bother if he was in the man's position. He couldn't help but hope that everything went smoothly as well. So that's how he found himself at the ever-imposing door of the jounin's apartment.

He knocked, and when no answer came and the jounin didn't open the door very quickly at all he couldn't help but frown concerned. He decided to follow his instincts and try the door. To his surprise it was open and he felt for any active traps. Upon finding some he disarmed them with surprising ease and slipped inside. The jounin's door was open, so logically the traps should be at full strength and not so easy to disarm. But for some reason they were, and upon looking around the jounin's cold apartment he found that the traps were actually unnecessary and just a way to show people someone was there.

'_This really can't be healthy. He only uses this as a temporary hotel for god's sake!'_ Iruka sighed, but then looked around for the jounin. He couldn't sense any chakra and that concerned him. _'Is he really back?... I shouldn't be here if he isn't…'_ but then he saw the bloody uniform clothes on the floor and immediate concern filled him. He decided to look around and saw traces of the shower being recently used. _'So you did just come back…'_

The chuunin sighed knowing that the man was probably fine if he could crawl into his bed. But he felt the need to see for himself. He felt wrong doing it, but he slipped into the jounin's room soundlessly. He saw the man was underneath the covers and he breathed a silent sigh of relief then smiled. _'Idiot… you had me worried… but why can't I sense your chakra very well at all?...'_ That made the concern return full-force for Iruka and he knew he had to check on the man. It didn't matter if he woke up a chakra-deprived shinobi that probably didn't remember where he was. He knew he would be able to save himself if he had too, and for some reason he felt like Kakashi would never hurt him.

So with that he slowly crept his way to Kakashi's bed and saw that the man was still masked. He felt thankful for that, but was concerned that the man slept with it on. He decided to address it in a tactful way later. He gently put his hand on the slumbering jounin's forehead and checked for a fever. Thankfully it was average temperature which was a good sign. He then gently slid the covers down the man's bare chest to see any wounds. By now his mind was strictly professional as he checked on the man. He knew jounin were famous for hating hospitals, so he had to make sure Kakashi was fine and did not need the hospital. He noticed the covers were red, but not worringly so. But upon looking at the man's body he found several deep cuts, scrapes, and frightening bruises. The man looked sewn together by different materials and Iruka was significantly worried about that. He also sighed realizing the man shouldn't even be sleeping peacefully. The bruises were that bad. He finally slid his hand gently along one particularly nasty cut and found that it only just stopped bleeding. With the stark contrast of his normal skin and the wounds he realized Kakashi was far paler than usual even for him. Iruka knew he should have woken Kakashi by now, but the state he was in made Iruka confident he could do just about anything to the man without waking him up.

'_Idiot…'_

The man was in no state to be at home, but he knew Kakashi wouldn't let anyone take him to the hospital without being forced to go. With that, he knew Kakashi was going to be miserable and he wandered how the man even got home. _'At least you are home. Though I don't consider this place to be anywhere near a home.'_ But Iruka, satisfied with his professional assessment did the best healing jutsu he could on the worst of the wounds. Namely the bruises. He had little training and experience in medical jutsu, but he knew he could soothe the soreness of the muscle fibers. After working on the man for quite the while, Iruka was satisfied he did the best he could. Knowing Kakashi was probably going to be very violated and untrusting if he found out what Iruka just did and that Iruka was in his room while he was sleeping, Iruka decided he should keep that to himself for now. With that, he left the room after covering Kakashi up again. The man getting a cold wouldn't help at all.

'_Now how else can I help you?...'_ Iruka took on his thinking pose when he entered the main room of the apartment and eyed the Kitchen.

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Kakashi awoke with a foggy head. He was completely unsure of where he was and that worried him greatly. But when his body caught up with his brain he realized three things; he was in something comfortable, he smelt something that caused his mouth to water, and he was sore and in some kind of pain all over his body.

'_This is the weirdest form of heaven I've ever been in…_' Not that he has been to any heavens, but nonetheless, he was pretty sure it wasn't like this.

Finally his mind caught up with him completely and he remembered he was just on a mission. He would have _died_ on that mission if he didn't re-learn the basics from Iruka. He only lived because the basics of warding off pursuit with low chakra were recently re-learned. _Iruka_ saved his life, and didn't even know it. He remembered staggering home, showering, then nothing after that. And now he was here. In his bed, and something smelled delicious in his _apartment_. He knew that he had zero chakra. He suffered through chakra depletion often enough to know the feeling, and symptoms. But he found he was glad he was still alive. And that Iruka was the one that unknowingly saved him. But now there was one problem. Who was in his apartment, and why did he smell food? He sighed knowing he had to find out one way or another instead of go back to sleep. Maybe the hokage dropped by after hearing he was back…? He sighed as he painstakingly, and slowly sat up in his bed. Then swung his legs over bed and prepared to stand up. God he was so sore. He seriously considered staying in bed, but decided to push it this time. Somehow he knew he wasn't going to get another chance of knowing who came by and actually cared.

'_Iruka-kun? Do you care enough to be here?...'_ with the thought of seeing Iruka he finally stood up and instantly, and quite nearly, fell on his face. But he steadied himself on the bed, and was pleased to find he still had his mask, hitai-ate, and even boxers on. Maybe he wasn't as exhausted when he got back as he thought? Nonetheless, he knew he wouldn't be able to put on his mask or anything else for that matter if that was the case. Far too much effort along with walking. God he hated being this weak. He finally stumbled his way to the door of his bedroom, and knew he could make it to the kitchen. His mind idly commented he should be far sorer than this. Last time he wasn't even able to move. Nonetheless he started using the hallway to help him on his way.

'_Only a few more steps… I hope it is you…'_ Kakashi thought as he finally entered the main room.

"Kakashi-kun!"

Kakashi smiled. _'Good.'_

"Maaa, you need to tell me when you're barging into my house Iruka-sensei."

Iruka only glared heatedly at the man. "Even incapacitated you are still so you!" Iruka barely resisted the urge to smack the back of his head as that may end badly.

"Of course Iruka-kun!" Kakashi was far happier than he could explain. Iruka was here to greet him and even made food! _'Hey… where'd he get the food?'_

"Where'd you get the food Iruka-kun?"

Iruka only rolled his eyes at the man's one-track mind. Of course, he remarked, when you're starving that tends to happen.

"I went to the store. " _'Then read a book and graded papers for about seven hours while waiting for you.'_ His mind remarked.

"Oh. Um, Iruka-kun?" He knew he was blushing again. Damn it.

"Yeah?" Iruka only smiled when he saw it.

"Why are you here?"

"I wanted to check on you when you got back from the mission. Now I see it was a good idea. I can't imagine coming "home" to this." Iruka sighed as he looked at the completely unwelcoming walls.

"Oh. Well, thank you. Thank you very much." _'You have no idea what this means to me, Iruka-sensei…'_ his mind added. He wandered briefly why he didn't say that.

"Anyway, the food is ready. Eat up."

Kakashi smiled widely and painstakingly began walking to the stool.

Iruka in turn smacked his forehead. "Idiot! I'm sorry Kakashi-kun. You are in no shape to move at all. How'd you even get out here? Well, it doesn't matter." Iruka then walked to Kakashi, put one of Kakashi's arms on his shoulders, then helped him to the couch.

"You need to be as comfortable as you can get. Moving around much isn't gonna' help at all." Iruka hid how awkward it was for him for the jounin to be wearing only boxers. But he counted his blessings and decided it was the lesser of two evils. Besides, Kakashi didn't need to be worried about what he was wearing in the state he was in. Finally, Iruka brought the food –his favorite again– to Kakashi. He then turned around and let the man eat at a comfortable pace. He was starving. He hadn't eaten since two days ago and was famished. Unfortunately he learned binging may satisfy the urge, but it ends up worse in the end.

"Thank you so much Iruka-sensei. You didn't have to do this at all." He saw Iruka only nod in response and caught the edges of a smile. He felt very warm and suddenly his apartment didn't seem as cold as it used to be.

"Say Iruka-kun, do you think anyone would care if I was to die?"

Iruka, shocked at the question, sputtered and turned around. To his relief the man had his mask back on. "Why would you ask that?"

"Just answer please?"

"Well of course several would care! You're the legendary copy-ninja and many would mourn your fall!"

Kakashi didn't like that answer, but he understood.

"I mean really care. Say, cry for me?" It was then that Iruka realized Kakashi felt so uncared for he had to ask Iruka indirectly for re-assurance.

"I'm sure there are. Sakura-chan and Naruto would I'm sure." Kakashi frowned, he wanted Iruka to say it.

"I wouldn't say I'd _cry_," Iruka paused, then explained, "I've done that far too long. But I can promise you I would be incredibly sad and hurt if you did die. Why would you ask?"

Kakashi smiled. That was it. That's what he needed. He then signaled Iruka to come closer. Iruka did so, and Kakashi smiled again, and then embraced Iruka as best and tightly as he could with his wounds. It felt good having someone that cared.

"Thank you, Iruka. It means a lot." It was only then he realized he didn't use an honorific. But it felt wrong now. Iruka meant far more to him than anyone of his "friends" now. They barely knew he had a mission. Iruka checked on him.

Iruka only blushed brightly knowing Kakashi just subtly asked if they could be closer. The man did become more important than any of his other friends by now, but he couldn't quite bring himself to accept how close they were becoming. It frightened him. But… the way he just cared about Kakashi ignoring his own personal boundaries today… Maybe he could accept it. And Kakashi himself did just inadvertently say he was the most trusted out of all he knew.

"Y-your welcome, Kakashi-ku… Kakashi." He couldn't stop his blush though. It was a big step and he knew it.

Kakashi in turn increased the tightness of his embrace and finally let go after a while. Iruka reciprocated his subtle offer and that meant just as much as all of the man's actions. He only then noticed he was still in his boxers. But, he couldn't bring himself to worry too much.

"Maaa, I am very tired now, Iruka. Can you help me to my bed?" He felt odd asking for help, but it was Iruka, and he found he had a permanent smile on his face.

"Sure."

Iruka then maneuvered Kakashi's arm around his neck and guided him to his room. Upon arriving he let go, knowing the man still had pride.

"Goodnight Kakashi, I'll come by here tomorrow. You just rest, alright?"

Kakashi nodded, then when Iruka left he painstakingly hobbled his way to his bed, and finally collapsed onto it.

'_Iruka… sorry for forcing you into all of this, but it means a lot to me what you do. You don't understand what the small things mean to me. It's all everyone has ever judged me on… so thank you… thank you…'_ was his last thought as he drifted off into a deep sleep.

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Iruka put the last of the food in the fridge intending to keep it for Kakashi as he seemed to really like it. That, and he'll need food at hand. Real food. He then sighed and sat down, absorbing what just happened. He knew he meant a lot to Kakashi. Why else would the man start opening up like that? But so close so soon… It was a bit much for Iruka, but he knew he'd be able to care for Kakashi as much as the man did for him eventually.

He finally looked around the cold apartment and found that a used kitchen did wonders to the atmosphere. However, it was still impersonal when all was silent. _'We need to do something about this Kakashi… I know you hate it here. Anyone would.'_ With that, he left silently. Resolving to check on the man as soon as he could tomorrow.

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**A/N: **FINALLY DONE! FINALLY! ALL 18 PAGES! (On Word). I'm sorry it took so long, but now you see WHY it did. I hope you liked it! It felt a bit choppy to me cuz' it was so long, but you know your feedback helps me a lot. What do you think of the story so far? Any guesses where it may go? Do you like the insanely long chapter? I hope so… Dx I stayed up waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay later than I should have writing it. I must sincerely and repeatedly apologize for how long this took. I'M SO SORRY! Also: I tend to end up re-reading my chapters often and finding HORRIBLE (except not really...) mistakes that bug me. So yeah. I apologize for those. XD

Rodrigo: *laughing manically in a corner*

Silent Stranger: He really is a nutcase… I can't fathom why. (*completely ignoring the fact it is a rabid plot bunny born from his mind that terrorizes him in his sleep.*)

_Replies to reviews:_

_Shadow: Thanks! I'm glad you're glad to be back on track! Lol. Sorry it took so long. -.-' But yay! It's here now! :D_

P.S: I took out all the Japanese words I could find in this chapter. But tell me if you prefer the story using these random Japanese words, or all English please. :D


	10. Reflections and Revelations of Tools

**A/N: **I am sorry for how long you waited for this damn chapter. I honestly have no excuse except I'm a HORRID author… at updating… sorry =(. And, well, school HAS been eating my soul… I'll try my best to make sure it doesn't happen THIS long again… *defends self from pointy pitchforks and knives, hiding behind Rodrigo* I also— well, nevermind. I'll save more bad news for later…

**Disclaimer: ** I own nothing, nada, zip, zilch, zero, ze`ro. NIENTE! Although I do giggle madly everytime I turn on my computer… Heh heh…

**Warning:** If it needs oooone… -.- And possible OOC-ness.

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Kakashi sighed as he stared at the mission room doors. He was still battered and wounded from that last mission that he should have died on. But, he was good at pretending to be perfectly functional. But when Tsunade checked him out upon Iruka bringing him in -against his will too!- She forbade him from taking missions for one month. What did this mean? He was absolutely bored. Extremely. Freaking. Bored. Usually during the day, of course, when Iruka had classes and was _not_ with the jounin. Iruka had been coming over to check on him and cook food most of the time while he was there. Kakashi knew it was the start of a true friendship. Well, one that he held dear anyway. He found he enjoyed living day to day now with Iruka's warmth in his heart. He knew he was being overly sensitive and under normal circumstances Iruka would never have affected him to start with. But without the copy-nin ever realizing it Iruka broke his walls so cleanly he had to question if he put them up in front of the chuunin. Kakashi liked to think he actually just slid through his walls unaffected, but that was more for his amusement to think of it as such.

Now the man was stuck remembering Iruka's somewhat silent, but ever-powerful presence in his apartment. It's true they haven't talked much since the first night, but Kakashi did not really care or mind much. There was something about the teacher grading papers and eating some kind of food _with_ him that made talking unnecessary. Positive thoughts humming around him, he entered the mission room heading straight to the chuunin's desk. Iruka looked up at him, acknowledging the jounin.

"Hello Kakashi-sensei," the chuunin said after a difficult pause. Kakashi frowned remembering they didn't want to keep their friendship from spreading into the gossip of the mission room. But he found that he didn't really care for the mission room's gossip. He just wanted the nearly unnoticeable intimacy of good friends. That lack of honorifics. He found he strongly disliked honorifics now, but he figured he was being ridiculous so just dealt with it.

"Hello. Would you care to join me at Ichiraku's soon?"

The chuunin only nodded, "yes."

The jounin smiled happily, glad he managed to do this nearly insurmountable task of asking Iruka out to lunch rather seamlessly. _' Iruka is coming with me to lunch again. I enjoyed spending time with him last time,'_ he paused and looked towards the ceiling, then remembered a book he read, '_I recall from what I have read this is what a true friendship is like.'_ He thought to himself, but then only said, "alright." in response. He then proceeded to leave and lean on a nearby wall, waiting for the chuunin as he read his Icha Icha.

While he was engrossed into the story of Muki screaming in pleasure as the hunky Tamashi made love to her shortly after saving her from- "Kakashi!," Iruka yelled at the man, apparently the love scene was longer than usual or something. Kakashi in turn only blushed slightly and closed his book quickly. "S-sorry…" he mumbled whilst scratching the back of his neck sheepishly.

"You were supposed to take longer…"

"I did say I was almost done Kakashi-san."

"No, you never _said_ it."

"Okay, I implied it when I answered yes to your '-_soon?'"_

"Well, um… yeah, but… that doesn't count!"

"How?"

"It just doesn't," Kakashi finished while he gently poked the chuunin's forehead, smiling to himself. He found the playful bicker gave him more of that warm feeling. However, Kakashi secretly sighed, he never realized how important a simple extra syllable was to him, but it was all he could focus on. "We need to let the public know we're good friends…" He said relatively boldly.

"W-wha? Why?"

_'Perhaps this wasn't such a good subject to breach…',_ "Because um… well…" the jounin found he was at a loss of words. "Can we just forget it?" he said rather aggressively, but scratched his neck again shyly, and apologetically, looking everywhere _but_ the chuunin's face. _'Kami, I have no idea what I'm doing…' _Iruka in turn only gave him a look, but shrugged it off. He knew the relationship was going to be difficult. Kakashi finally gestured Iruka to follow him after a pause to Ichiraku's. As they walked a comfortable silence filled the air and Kakashi sighed relieved, _'I can handle _this_'. _

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Soon, they arrived. Iruka followed after the masked man as he slid into the restaurant's stool. Iruka slid into the other chair right by Kakashi's seat. Iruka realized it was a bit odd since Naruto was not in the middle of them, but knew it was important to get used to being with Kakashi. Which, if he was perfectly honest with himself, was very rapidly happening with his repeated visits to watch over the man. _'Kakashi, why is it I need to do these things for you? '_ the chuunin thought idly. Of course he realized he probably should order soon. Teuchi was waiting for him impatiently. "Ah, I'll have pork and miso ramen please, thank you." He said shyly to the man as he handed the man the menu.

He then finally turned to look at his companion, "what made you bring me here today Kakashi? You know I'm going over to your apartment soon."

"I know, I just… wanted to do something nice for you I guess…" Kakashi trailed off, unsure how to address the question properly, but figured his response was perfectly valid since Iruka didn't give him too strange of a look.

"Hn..." Iruka grunted in response and nodded as he waited.

"Well, alright. You assumed I'd like Ichiraku's again eh?" Iruka joked, but then he saw the intense gleam of panic in Kakashi's visible eye. "I do! I do… I just, was saying… um… I did take Naruto out _a lot_ for a reason you know…" he said then sheepishly smiled as he blushed.

Kakashi finally smiled, calm. _'That was close… I don't actually know if _can_ do this now that I think of it… __**anything**__ I do can be something I don't realize is right to say… Oh…'_ he thought tiredly, and worried. _'What do normal people talk about while eating out?...'_ Thankfully, Iruka came to his rescue again.

"So, how are your wounds now?"

"Surprisingly good and healing well. I still don't know how I was even able to wake up the first day you were in my house though. Last time I was that injured and bloodied I slept, then didn't wake up for about two or three days."

Iruka's mind then choose that moment to panic, as Iruka stared wide-eyed. _'I don't heal _that _well though… But, Tsunade did say –AFTER—I healed him and he went with me to report to her the next day, that he should have been knocked out for several days and my healing made it so that he wasn't in a crisis condition… But I swear I am not trained well in medical ninjutsu… maybe healing my brat's bruises made me especially effective at any bruises?... But…,'_ the chuunin just sighed, confused himself why he was apparently so important. _'I was only helping you…'_ at that moment he realized he'd been staring wide-eyed at Kakashi for about five minutes straight. And, judging on the man's worried eye, he was clearly worried.

"I'm sorry! I just, I couldn't imagine you being so injured as to need that long just to start up again…" Iruka looked down shyly, scratching his scar. "It's okay Iruka-kun, the food's here." Kakashi replied as he looked at Teuchi, noticing their orders in the man's hands. The man set the bowls down and both Iruka and Kakashi tucked in, avoiding talk for now. Of course, Kakashi finished before Iruka even saw him dip his chopsticks in.

Iruka, upon realizing Kakashi just swallowed his food, glared at the man heatedly. "You know, Kakashi-kun, it is incredibly unhealthy to eat this way… Now I remember why we don't eat out anymore…"

"Sorry Iruka-kun…"

"It's fine I suppose," the man replied with a tired sigh.

From then, Kakashi watched Iruka as the tanned man ate. He didn't watch closely, or even uncomfortably. He just watched idly as the man handled his chopsticks. _'I don't understand how you did it… you are just so,… you…'_ After the man finished, he only stared at random objects thinking to himself about the chuunin. Nothing specific, just thinking. How the man made him relax, Iruka's domestic ways, Iruka making his void apartment a home… He then realized Iruka was talking to him.

"Thank you Kakashi, I'll see you later. Maybe we can do this again soon."

"What? Well, okay… see you?" the jounin replied, smiling that there was no honorific that time. Granted it was perfectly fine since few people were even near hearing range of them while they ate at the ramen stand. But what mattered was he heard it again, and in semi-public.

"Yep," the man then started walking off, giving Kakashi a smile and wave which Kakashi only too happily returned. _'Well, so far it looks like I'm going to be fine…'_

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From there, Kakashi strolled aimlessly around town, starting to head to the memorial stone. But he spotted Gai, Kurenai, and Asuma outside of a bar.

"Kakashi-saaan!" Kurenai yelled out whilst waving, which of course, made Kakashi sigh heavily and hang his head just a bit. _'Maybe if I go now they won't force me to stay…'_ he thought as he headed over to his "friends'" location. Kurenai smiled happily as Asuma let out a grumbled "hello" in response and Gai went on about how the springtime of youth is so marvelously brilliant with- from then, Kakashi ignored the spandex-clad man.

"Yo, Kurenai-sensei, what did you want?"

"Well, me and Asuma were talking and found you seemed much more… _optimisitic_." The woman said experimentally, suggesting Kakashi should pick up on something.

"You think I'm happier?" He asked dully, blinking his single eye emotionlessly.

"No. Well, yeah… You have stopped reading your gross book all the time, you don't snap at everyone and there's just an aura of optimis- well, that's way too strong of a word. Perhaps positivity is better? But yeah. Sooooo… who's the new girl Kakashi-san?," Kurenai ended with that voice all woman get when they are suggesting something they'd love to gossip about. The woman even added a wink and a nudge. Kakashi mentally shivered. _'All kunoichi are psycho…'_ he thought to himself. But Gai then took that moment to proclaim how the youthful flowers of love and life and- _'cue tuning out again, and ignoring the man, then going on to more interesting stuff like how I am apparently so negative.'_

"What? Am I really that negative?"

"You are not that positive…" the woman said slyly.

Kakashi sighed, electing to ignore the woman because he didn't feel like letting her focus on the question she just asked. Because of that, he turned to Asuma.

"Do I seem different to you Asuma-san?"

"Not as different as Kurenai says," the gruff man answered with puff of his cigarette, "but you do seem somewhat different. I doubt anyone who doesn't know you would notice the difference though. I don't think I've ever seen you truly happy though…" the last part was more of a mumble from the man, but Kakashi easily heard it.

_'None of you "know" me… but I guess you are my "friends"_…_'_ Kakashi lifted his brow in response, then said, "interesting… guess this work break is actually helping me…"

With that, the silver-haired man left without so much as a goodbye. He could hear Kurenai grumbling about how she was probably wrong about his positivity and generally seemed indignant about his departure realizing he didn't actually answer her question, but Kakashi had to think. _'You're affecting me a lot if Asuma and the others can tell…'_

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Kakashi then decided to sit and think at the memorial stone, he could tell a lot had to be figured out with the sudden addition of the tan chuunin in his life. So he then took to the roof-tops and bounded leisurely to the memorial stone. Upon arriving in roughly five minutes, he got to the memorial site, and then landed cleanly in front of the stone. The man then sat down, relaxing with his back leaning against the cool stone.

_'All I've done my life is serve Konoha and run myself into the ground only to get fixed up and sent out again. Only recently have I learned what it's like to have a friend and want to come back from a mission… what am I going to do still? I was going to go on with my life in ANBU, becoming a Hound in the darkness… But, maybe I shouldn't do that anymore? I am no longer used to putting my life on the line. I want to come home and see Iruka again… And because I want to do that more than mechanically finish all the missions… I think I have to quit ANBU again… I can't help but think of our time at Ichiraku… and everywhere else, he is always there now, and I know I can't not think about him… So I guess he's important to me now? I would go as far to say as I might truly _need_ you Iruka… and if that's true then I can no longer be in ANBU with so much at stake… would I spill the secrets of Konoha if I knew they would kill you otherwise Iruka? Minato? Do you know? The fact that I can say for certain I am unsure if I would is a clear statement though… I can't be in ANBU if I can _think_ about betraying Konoha…How come you mean so much to me Iruka? Why did you make me care so much as to consider quitting ANBU? Why is that it is always you I could dare-say I care about? What did you do to me…?'_

The silver-haired man sighed as his mind went into over-drive. He knew he had a weakness now, and that weakness was Iruka. Word could absolutely _not_ get out about his feelings if he was still in ANBU. Which, currently, he still was.

_'I think I am going to quit ANBU for you, Iruka…' _was his last thought as he got up, then bounded off to the Hokage's tower, paying little attention to his still hurting wounds as he lightly touched the bruises on his chest. That area always felt warmer than usual…

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**A/N:** TA-DA! THE OTHER BAD NEWS! 3-ish months to come up with this crap length and generally poor chapter. =.=' It's even worse because I have no idea what's gonna' happen next. I assume Kakashi is going to ask to resign, but who knows? Anyway I again _**SINCERELY**_ apologize for how long this took, I'll try my best not to let it take this long ever again… School just kills man… Thanks again SO MUCH for sticking with it. Here: *throws delicious cookies at all precious readers and reviewers excessively*. Hope you enjoyed!


	11. Of Bath Time and Humorous Jounin

**A/N:** HI GUYS! I'M BACK FAR QUICKER THAN LAST TIME! WOOOOOOOOOOO! Anyway, I am pleased to announce chapter 11 of Perplexed, and where things get good! *giddy fangirl scream* took me long enough! Oh, and also this chapter is EXTREMELY long, so please get comfortable. : )

**Disclaimer: **WHY DO YOU NEED TO KNOW EVERY SINGLE FREAKING TIME THAT I DON'T OWN ANYTHING! Oh right, because Masashi reads my fanfictions for ideas of fanservice in Naruto. Of course! (NOOOOOOT.)

**Warnings:** See previous chapters… Possible OOC-ness of people…

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'_That was,'_ Iruka paused in his thought process searching for the right word,_ 'unexpected, to say the least… Why'd I offer us to go out again when he vacuums up his food anyway? Honestly I just think he throws it over his shoulder and henges it into fake street… maybe… regardless, I did enjoy our time again. We really are spending a lot of time together… if the jounin apartments weren't so empty I'd be more worried about our friendship getting out! I do want the public to at least not be shocked by our friendship, but I know he is in ANBU and so our current friendship needs to be kept secret- well, under wraps anyway. I don't understand entirely why he doesn't just ditch me and stick with ANBU, the pay is fantastic. But then again, I recognized a long time ago he needed someone important in his life. I realized this the first time he hugged me. But quitting ANBU for someone? That usually only happens with in-love couples. And Kakashi and I are faaaaar from "in-love". Perhaps he is desperate to find a reason to quit that life?' _Iruka sighed, his thoughts whirling in his head attempting to predict every scenario and all the reasonings behind each. Eventually he let out a groan of frustration and just stopped. _'I'll figure this stuff out later…'_

As he rounded a corner to get to his house, he felt a prick. Then everything in his eyesight turned upside down and soon blurred into black. _'Ambush?...'_ was his last thought as the darkness over-took him.

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Right as soon as Kakashi stepped into the front entrance of the Hokage tower, he sensed it. A threatening aura to his right. He immediately dodged in any way he could, switching to an offensive position, kunai withdrawn.

"Ah, you are indeed a strong ANBU member…"

Kakashi could only stare surprised as he saw an ANBU member full in uniform. He recognized it as a messenger. Upon seeing this, he replaced his kunai in its pouch and took-on his customary slouch.

"What do you want?"

"First, privacy," the stranger replied as Kakashi saw the signs for a barrier jutsu made, then casted.

"No one can hear or see us now who isn't looking for a barrier like this."

Kakashi only raised a brow and nodded, "Alright? Now what do you want?"

"I've been chosen to inform you to terminate your relationship with the chuunin academy teacher: Iruka Umino. Our eyes have reported you getting extremely friendly with him. So much so, that such rapid friendliness is too suspicious to allow us, to allow you to continue your 'friendship'."

Kakashi rolled his eyes. _'Thank Kami I was able to think this through already. Even the ANBU members have noticed my change!'_

"Ah, I see… I shall remedy the situation immediately."

"Very well, thank you Hound. I shall inform the higher-ups the situation will be rapidly cured." The ANBU member bowed slightly, then performed the sign for "release". He waved farewell as Kakashi watched the bird mask disappear in the smoke of a teleportation jutsu. _'Now then, time to go end my career again,'_ his heart clenched slightly for unknown reasons, but he sauntered down a hallway to the Hokage's room.

Upon arriving, he took in a deeper breath than usual and walked in -without knocking of course-. He was met with the sight of Tsunade drinking a rather large bottle of sake. Tsunade in turn widened her eyes and quickly stuffed it away.

"Hatake-brat! Don't you have any common manners? What if I was doing something you would've loved to live without seeing?"

Kakashi only stared at her, bored aura present. The Godaime growled slightly, but rubbed her forehead and put on her serious expression.

"Now what do you want?" she could tell Kakashi was serious; his usually bored grey eye was set in a determined manner. She worried slightly, but knew he would explain.

"I wish to resign from ANBU, permanently."

Tsunade only widened her eyes, shock growing rapidly.

"W-what, brought about this decision?"

"I have found someone I care about too much to risk the village and myself for them. Also, I would like to resume my jounin rank."

Tsunade sputtered. _'What the hell is this? He has never been this honest and straight-forward!'_ Upon gaining her composure, she finally formulated an intelligent reply- well, a hokage reply in her opinion.

"Are you sure about this, brat?"

Kakashi in turn only nodded. He couldn't figure out why his heart seemed to clench so tightly, but he was certain. If ANBU and his friends saw this change in him while he didn't even realize it himself, it was time to end his position. Permanently was a bit much, but he had to be certain to never join again. The dark missions he took so often were all coming back at him. He couldn't take anymore. He had to separate himself from his darkest side for good.

Tsunade narrowed her eyes, looking intently at her shinobi. She cared about him to a point, she knew he wasn't a tool, and knew he was human. _'Whatever is happening, it better be for your good__,__ brat.'_ She thought as she nodded. She gestured the man over, placing one hand on the tattoo underneath the jounin shirt signifying Kakashi's rank and with the other made the sign of release.

"You are free now Kakashi-san, I do hope you are totally sure about this. You cannot come back again. I'm also sure you know this?"

"Yes, hokage-sama."

"Very well, brat. Good luck on whomever this someone is. I hope they are worth this decision."

As Kakashi remembered Iruka's bright smile directed at him and the man's gentle nature, he smiled his signature smile.

"They are."

"Very well, you are dismissed!"

With that, Kakashi teleported off the scene and headed home. He was disappointed as he arrived in front of his apartment door to not smell anything cooking, but he sighed deciding it was a bit much. He opened the unlocked door only to be greeted by pitch blackness.

"Hmmm… I suppose you can't come every night." He said aloud quietly, looking into the darkness. The pure black emptiness of the room got to him. There was just so much nothing it reminded him of his entire life. If he wished he could imagine the slight reflections of imaginary blood as seen by the moon. The dark made him shiver involuntarily. He knew he was more disappointed than he should've been though. He noticed also that his tattoo was extremely warm. _'It was like this last time I quit ANBU…'_ he thought to himself. The silver-haired man then proceeded to turn on the lights and go to the fridge, attempting to forget the abyss of his "home". His lunch with Iruka was about five hours ago and he hoped Iruka left some food from his previous times cooking. He looked around in the fridge and spotted some remains of his favorite food. _'Perfect!'_ he quickly took it out and started warming it up.

The jounin leaned on the counter of the kitchen staring off into the living room. He felt Obito's eye well-up a bit at the memory of Iruka accepting the close friendship. He remembered how tired he was and still wondered how he was able to get up the same day he went to sleep. Upon thinking he was acutely aware of his bruises that were always slightly warmer located on his chest than the other ones on his legs. It always confused him and he knew there was something significant about it. Now that he thought about it, those same bruises were almost fully healed and barely hurt now compared to his others. He knew Iruka was there when he woke up, but was he there whilst he was sleeping? Did he do something? That thought alarmed him. He temporarily thought Iruka was a spy and cast a strange jutsu on him. He already quit ANBU! But, he remembered the chuunin's honest eyes and knew he was genuine. The beeping of the microwave stirred him from his thoughts and Kakashi smiled unable to wait for the delicious soup.

The jounin quickly took out the soup, pulled down his mask, and ate peacefully. As he stared at his chest and arm bruises located underneath his shirt while he ate, he smiled to himself. _'You've changed so much about my life already…'_ He couldn't quite shake the alarm of Iruka possibly planning something, but sighed as he knew he had to trust the man, no matter how hard it was. It was his most prominent trial in this friendship and he sincerely hoped he wouldn't ruin anything.

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The first thing the tanned man was aware of when he came too was the darkness. It was completely black. The second thing he was aware of was the bitter bite of the chilling metal his back made contact with. The final thing he realized was that the metal was that cold while he was still fully clothed. Not armed, but clothed. _'Trapped…'_ was the chuunin's only thought as he realized he was in a dark cage of sorts. His ninja mind took over as he attempted to figure out his surroundings and exactly where –or who— he was imprisoned by. Before he could fully figure out the design of the wooden bed in the corner –it seemed similar to leaf— he was quickly addressed by the voice of none other than Ibiki Morino, head of the Torture and Investigation unit.

"Iruka Umino. We have taken you into custody to answer important questions regarding you and Konoha's safety, you are in no way charged for treason or betrayal of information of Konoha."

Iruka widened his eyes, but let out a mental sigh of relief before responding, "Ah. Then why didn't you just ask me in a private place like a normal person rather than scaring the daylights out of me?"

He heard Ibiki's gruff and fake laughter through the metal of his cage.

"We were seeing how strong you were, and from the looks of it, not very strong at all."

Iruka growled lightly at the insult.

"I'm well trained in surviving torture for months Ibiki-_san__,_" he made sure to add bite to his words.

"Very well then, sensei," the man replied unfazed, "now it's time to answer the questions."

As he heard the man's words, a sudden burning light filled up and nearly blinded Iruka before he shielded his eyes. He saw his cage light up and found it was surprisingly comfortable- for prison. After getting used to the light, he stepped out of the now open door and realized he was in the main un-prepared torture chamber. The skylights were out and filling the place with afternoon light. _'How long have I been out?...'_ as if reading his mind, the torture specialist said, "you've been out for the remainder of yesterday and morning of today. I apologize. Mitsurgui loaded a bit _too_ much of the knock-out drug…"

Iruka could only shake his head and rub his tired forehead. "Right… I hope my classes and jobs were taken care of?"

"Of course, sensei."

Iruka could only sigh. He knew the next day was going to be absolutely _thrilling_ for his jobs. "Well, what are the questions?"

"The questions involve a certain Hatake Kakashi."

_That_ caught Iruka off-guard.

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me right. Your relationship with him has rapidly progressed and we had to be sure you were not using some kind of strange tricks on him."

Iruka could not believe he was hearing what was coming out of the serious man's mouth, and to be honest he was sick of what it implied.

"_Tricks? _TRICKS? YOU HONESTLY THINK I AM GOING TO DO SOMETHING TO KAKASHI JUST 'CUZ HE HASN'T BEFRIENDED ANYONE? HE HAS ASUMA, KURENAI-CHAN, GAI-SAN, AND EVEN ANKO-CHAN TO A POINT! IS IT REALLY SO HARD TO BELIEVE HE IS HUMAN?"

"Iruka-sensei, please ca-"

"NO! I WILL NOT CALM DOWN! KAKASHI IS A HUMAN AND ACTUALLY IS CAPABLE OF HAVING TRUE FRIENDS!" after Iruka's long (and loud) outburst, he took several deep breaths in an attempt to calm down to a point, however he was still pissed to hell. His voice dripped to dangerous levels.

"I'll have you KNOW, Ibiki-_sa__n,_ that Kakashi is in fact completely normal and chooses to be my friend. I also consider him a good friend of mine. If you question Kakashi and I's friendship again on terms of "it's weird. He must be brain-washed!" I swear to Kami I will find every single possible way to get the Hokage on my side and make your life hell. Kakashi is perfectly functional enough to have friends. Geez, no wonder he doesn't try to be-friend anyone; all of Konoha must know!"

Ibiki could only stare wide-eyed (which in Iruka's eyes was equivalent to speechlessness and shock on that man's side) and said nothing.

"Now if you'll excuse me Ibiki-san, I have things to do," the chuunin mumbled now becoming entirely mortified he just exploded on someone like _Ibiki_. And not only exploded (_again_ his mind added ever so happily) but _threatened_ the man. Of course he hid the mortification as best he could.

"Ah… very well, Iruka-sensei," the man managed after a long and awkward pause.

"See you around," Iruka said as he bowed to the man slightly, hoping to save his head.

"Goodbye…" Ibiki muttered. _'Good thing it was only us two… I'd never have lived this down…'_

With that, Iruka promptly left and went straight to his apartment. Asuma could only stare as Iruka rushed by him on the street completely ignoring his presence. _'I was hoping to grab some barbeque Iruka…'_ He however did not question it further as he knew Iruka would come to him if he needed him.

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When Iruka arrived to his home distressed, he couldn't help but go and shower both because he was due for one, and he needed to relax, breathe, and think. _'Alright, so I exploded on __**Ibiki**__ of all people because he, along with assumedly everyone in the village strongly believes Kakashi is an emotionless douche bag who isn't capable of human emotions… Alright, justifiable reason figured out, now then… Why did I get so ridiculously angry at him? What are my feelings for Kakashi exactly? I do greatly value him; he's an intelligent man whom isn't anywhere near what he makes himself out to be in public. He's easy to be with, and though extremely lacking in social skills, still understands feelings to a point. I'd rather spend time with him or Asuma before anyone else in my "friend" list… Preferably Kakashi… so if Kakashi is more important than my closest friend, he is therefore my __**best**__ friend? Oi… how did I care about you as much as Asuma, Kakashi? I barely know you…'_ thoughts racing, the chuunin finally closed his eyes and let the warm water take him. _'I do care a lot about you… You are nothing like I expected and everything __**but **__what I used to hate… Guess you're almost my most important friend Kakashi. But I need to get to know you better if I can confidently say that aloud…'_ as the steady sound of water floated through his ears, he relaxed more, a little more ready and accepting of what his latest "explosion" was about. _'I hope you didn't miss me too much last night Kakashi… I'll go over to your apartment tonight.'_

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Kakashi awoke slowly, enjoying the rare chance of waking up slowly. He let his sense of touch take-over first, the warm and extremely comfortable bed, the sun's barely piercing, -but still there- rays of light. He then let his nose take over from there; he breathed in the distinct scent of both him and his several ninken, and the generic vanilla shampoo. Then he let his hearing take over; the slight chirp of birds, rustling of his ninken, and… the blaring alarm. Kakashi sighed as his moment was ruined by the clock, but unwilling to let it ruin his rare ritual he blindly turned it off, then slowly opened his eyes. His ninken were all over the floor and parts of his bed, which was fine because the bed was massive anyway and helped make it seem less lonely, and his blinds were mostly closed. He finally looked to his alarm clock to see three o' clock in the afternoon. _'Oi… well, sleeping in never hurt anyone with nothing to do anyway.'_ He finally sighed content at getting this wake-up experience imprinted in his mind. _'I rarely get to do this… well, time to get ready for the "day" I suppose.'_

With that in mind, he got up off the bed, stepped over his sleeping mutts as best he could while being quiet, then headed straight to his shower. He quickly cleaned up, skipping shaving for the day and moving on to clothes and brushing his teeth. After that he slid on his boxers and uniform pants, but chose to remain shirtless. He wasn't going anywhere for the day anyway. Really all he had to look forward too was when Iruka may or may not come over. He sighed forlornly as he saw it was now 3:20pm on his clock. _'Why don't you go fast when I'm awake?...'_ he mentally complained at the device. Just to spite him it slowly turned to 3:21pm as he stared at it, which upon seeing its cruel act Kakashi only sighed.

'_What can I do to pass the time,'_ the jounin asked himself in disgruntlement. _'Ah, perhaps I can treat the dogs to what I'm sure they'll consider a "spa" day… But they'll expect it again maybe. And then there's the ungrateful Pakkun mutt…' _he sighed, _'but I truly have nothing important to do… at all. All day. Damn you Tsunade-sama… I guess I'll treat them to the day, they damn well better realize it's rare though.'_ With his actions settled for the day and meant to take long enough for Iruka to arrive –assuming he does— he threw on only his jounin uniform shirt, mask, sandals, and hitai-ate and left to the nearest grocer, leaving out his vest for the day but taking a few extra weapons to stuff in his clothes. Never knew when something might happen to the village after all.

As he walked casually to the nearest grocer he noticed he forgot his Icha-Icha which surprised him. But it was only a quick trip anyway. He ignored everyone like usual, but paid attention to the scenery. He always loved Konoha's nature, as it was much a part of the surrounding forest. The masked man admired the Cherry Blossoms, kids playing, and the natural foliage of Konoha enjoying his walk. _'I might have to do this more often…'_ flitted by in his thoughts as he arrived at the grocer. He immediately went straight to the meat section, got some fresh almost gravy-like meat in abundance as well as a few jugs of premium grade water. He thought he'd spoil the mutts a little bit. After all, they are the only ones that have been there for him since Rin and Minato died. Kakashi sighed forlornly as he remembered the several nights in his teen years as ANBU that resulted in a bad mission and his dogs surrounded him in a sort of doggy hug. He remembered their warmth and concern after his very first bad mission. They wanted him to quit ANBU, but he decided then and there to never give up and live up to the legends he's lost. From those first few bad missions he quickly became immune and the rest became a blur. The only other missions in ANBU he remembered are the ones that required him to either be a sex object, or force some kind of sexual acts to his targets. He was quite adept at using his "charm" to eliminate those whom he had no other means or tools to eliminate them. He was also aware that he did what he learned was "manipulating hearts". After quitting ANBU the first time but still taking high-ranked jounin missions he had a period in which he read several books about feelings and emotions he never really understood. He only knew a few feelings after finding a name for them: sorrow, loneliness, and being lost. He was vaguely aware of affection and perhaps _love_ from his early years. He learned them during his time with Obito, Rin, and Minato. He knew he was a disabled human being, and being the genius he was tried getting at least somewhat socially aware. But books didn't help with a lot of things. Only theories, as he learned the hard way. After shaking his head and realizing he was staring at a wall while holding his goods for an extended period of time, he sighed as he knew he got lost in memory. He did, however, grab several steaks and an extra large one for Bull.

His ninken were all he truly had for almost all his life. If not for those books and his attempts at being normal, he wouldn't even have acquaintances like Kurenai or Asuma. But until Iruka, he never truly had a friend. He rubbed his forehead as he knew he had to get back home. With that he went to the counter ignoring the woman's looks and paid an enormously large sum of money for all of his groceries. Plenty more than was actually needed. As the woman was about to give it back to him he held up his hand, "keep it," was all he said as he left the store. _'I don't need it…'_ as he was walking he realized he forgot to tell the woman not to tell anyone of the extra money he paid as he does whenever he buys anything, but he sighed hoping to Kami the woman wasn't one to spread it everywhere. He doubted this was true, but one could always hope. As he was walking he just realized that he wouldn't be getting as much money now that he quit ANBU for good, but it honestly didn't matter as he still had a large sum saved from just having extra after buying what he needed. _'I won't be able to get a house as easily- but then again I also don't need a house. I barely need an apartment.'_ he sighed as he realized he was being far more depressing than usual today and hoped sincerely Iruka would come tonight. He felt it was kind of pathetic to be so eager for a visit, but he needed to see the man again. Maybe he would make his day- or at least thoughts, more positive.

The silver-haired man finally arrived at his apartment and slid in easily whilst juggling his massive haul of groceries. He finally set it all down and immediately set to work making the special meal. He opened all the bags of almost soupy meat and combined them all into one extremely large bowl he had specially made to hold eight hungry dog's food. He finally summoned the special bowls for each dog. Pakkun's the smallest and Bull's the largest. Despite how large Bull's bowl was, though, it was only half the size of the massive bowl. Kakashi actually doubted being able to lift that massive bowl for an extended time while it was full like it was. With the gooey but delicious meat ready, he finally set to open and prepare all the steaks. He knew his dogs liked it best while the steaks were only cooked long enough to get the juices flowing, then the rest raw. He started with Bull's steak first as it was of course the largest and hardest to prepare next to Pakkun's small steak. He opened the steak packages getting some blood on the counter as he used a small fire jutsu to warm Bull's steak the right way. He finally got the entire thing barely turned brown. He dumped half the contents of the massive bowl into Bull's, and then topped it with the steak. As soon as he began working on each of the dog's bowls and steaks, except Pakkun's, said dog wandered in, nose up and eyes excited for once. Kakashi only stared wide-eyed as he knew he was busted. Regardless, he also poured and set-up the bowls of premium water.

"Um, good morning, Pakkun… I was just making a little something," he mumbled shyly.

"You haven't done this since your first sexual encounter mission, brat," Pakkun grumbled to him surprised. However he was evidently happy.

Kakashi in turn very lightly blushed and sighed, he only had one mission that had to be done in person, and not with clones that were sexual in nature. He never enjoyed having his virginity taken away by a mission, but in all honesty never considered it truly taken away; that was for a mission, life is entirely different. He was able to use clones for all of his other missions, but unfortunately too late. He was taken and never liked the circumstances…

"You're zoning out again boss."

"Oh, sorry…" he decided to dwell on that later.

"So what made you do this for us? You don't seem very stressed or panicked at all, so the circumstances are different."

"I," Kakashi paused searching for an answer, but found he had none, "really don't know… It passes the time I guess…"

Pakkun only seemed to do an expression that appeared similar to a human raising an eyebrow.

"I see," the pug paused in thought, "Is this about Iruka?"

Kakashi only widened his eyes, he was pretty sure it had nothing to do with the man, but based on how he was acting all day…

"It might. I have no idea why, though," the man replied truthfully.

"Huh… He never did come over yesterday, but why would that affect you so much?"

"I have no clue… I might have gotten used to him already," the man asked more than stated.

"I can't tell you, pup."

Kakashi only raised an eyebrow at the old nickname. But considering he was doing what pretty much the pug was doing –visiting old times-, he decided to let it go this time. It brought old memories of his dead father, and he frowned to himself not wishing to continue thinking so negatively.

"Um, I am almost finished… give me a bit more time."

The pug looked towards his room knowingly, "well you only have about one minute. They're stirring now," he said with an amused hint to his voice.

Kakashi's eyes only widened to frightening levels as he very quickly set-up the rest of the bowls (with each dog's name at the bottom and side too) the same way he had with Bull's. Only adjusting how cooked the meat was for each dog. Pakkun's was most cooked being brown all around the edges and approaching the center, Urushi's was almost entirely raw having been heated more-so for feel rather than effect, Shiba's was actually slightly cooked compared to Urushi's, Bisuke's steak was very slightly less cooked than Pakkun's, Akino's was exactly half-cooked and half raw, Uhei's steak was more cooked than raw, but had plenty of raw spots for the dog, and finally Guruko's steak was almost as cooked as Bisuke's and Pakkun's. Kakashi let out a huge sigh of relief as he finished Pakkun's steak last and the rest of the pack came running in excitedly. He set down each bowl as they arrived waiting for the food to be served, followed by several "thanks yous" as they all dug in, Pakkun actually giving an impression of a smile to Kakashi as he tucked in.

Kakashi sighed in relief as they ate. He knew it took all of them about ten minutes minus Pakkun, who tended to take seven to eight. Now knowing he had to clean the mess he made with the blood and having no readily available cleaning materials, he simply took off his shirt and used it to clean everything. He figured blood always got on him anyway, how was this different? Not to mention he was gonna bathe them soon anyway. _'I should probably get in only my swim trunks for that…'_ he idly thought as he watched the dogs. He also felt the mask growing clingy and he slid it down allowing it to pool around his neck for now. He smiled slightly as he threw his bloodied shirt in the hamper after using a bit of soap to finish cleaning. It felt good using his own Kitchen despite the fact it was for his dogs. He looked towards Pakkun whom finished a little earlier than usual so he figured the other dogs were about to finish. He frowned as he knew it was time to bathe them all, and that was very chaotic. So in an attempt to reduce the chaos, he decided to set-up the bathroom as normal; take out all things that he didn't want to get wet –'cuz everything _did_ get wet in there— set up the soapy tub, and let 'em loose. He also decided he'd take his time and wash them well one by one. As they all finished he guided them into his bathroom, all things but the mirror and stuff he didn't mind getting wet thrown in his bedroom. They all walked far calmer and slower into the bathroom hoping this "spa" day was for a good reason and wouldn't ruin their moods, because currently they were all –even Pakkun— extremely content and happy. The dogs that liked the tub all hopped in enjoying the suds and playing with each other. It was time to let go and relax. Bull remained in the center of the floor and Kakashi smirked as he knew Bull was up first. His favorite to bathe 'cuz he was so calm and loving. He grabbed the extra-length shower-head and wet the large dog fully. He then grabbed shampoo. Kakashi laughed softly as the mood was getting too him and he got on his knees and began sudding the large dog up, petting him deeply and vigorously everywhere to clean him and treat him to a nice petting. He never noticed the click of the door as he worked on Bull, then Uhei, laughing to himself as he got fully soaked, and fully expected it.

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Iruka's day proceeded extremely slowly after he got home from Ibiki's little _investigation_. When he got home he saw it was 4 o' clock and sighed as he knew he had to wait _at least_ two more hours until he even started towards Kakashi's apartment. _'God, why am I so… 'eager'? To go over to that man's apartment __**tonight**__? I've never been this eager all the other times… Maybe it's because I haven't seen him for about two days now. Surely that's it.'_ The scarred chuunin sighed extremely heavily as he sat down on his couch. The man was starting to confuse him more than Asuma and Kurenai's "relationship" did. _'I've already figured out that you mean more to me than even Asuma. I think it's because you are almost depending on me to teach you…'_ the chuunin sighed as he remembered all the times Kakashi teased him and how he always used to hate the man. But as he thought about the man's apologies and almost begging letter (or at least it had a tone of desperateness in the letter) he knew he did the right thing confronting the man. He also sighed as he remembered Pakkun had to help with that particular venture. _'How did we become such good friends so rapidly, Kakashi? I've never let many people in ever since Mizuki… And yet boom, it was just so natural with you when you actually treated me fairly and respectfully...'_ _'And then there are all the small things I thought you would know how to do, or were aware of. You barely are aware of human emotions. You even told me you had to read books! I think… ugh now I can't remember. But still, the fact you had to resort to books… it tells me a lot about you already. You obviously never experienced many, -if any- emotions, or at least were able to name them. You just carry with you so much pain, loss, tragedy… and the fact you somehow let yourself cry out to me to help you… it also tells me you trust me greatly. And of course I can easily tell I'm the first you've ever trusted so much in an extremely long time. But what can I say? I can't probe into the mysteries of your life until you wish to discuss them with me. Perhaps I can ask you, and if you say no then we'll just have to wait 'till you're comfortable.' _

The tanned man sighed heavily again as his thinking never seemed to stop even when he wanted it too. _'I'll grade papers now, I have officially thought enough about this to myself. I should talk to Asuma… but then again I don't want to let him __in__ on __**anything**__ involving you as I'm certain everything you've shared with me you've never shared with anyone else. Perhaps I can go hypothetical… but he'll easily see through that… I guess maybe I'll just talk to you. I need to get to know you better anyway…' _Iruka sighed again as he growled at his ever-thinking brain. _'Grading now, thinking later,'_ with that the man firmly set a stack of still un-graded papers down and fished out his red pen.

"The frist way you can conrtol ckhra is-" Iruka's eye twitched as he saw Konohamaru's paper on chakra control. _'You need massive spelling help Konohamaru-kun…'_ but to his contented surprise the paper actually was decent and did in fact address the subject. Iruka stared wide-eyed making sure it was Konohamaru's and gave him a solid B. Grammar was important to a ninja still. Regardless, he was extremely pleased. _'You guys are actually learning and beginning to listen… I guess it is time for you guys to graduate soon.'_ The chuunin smiled bitter-sweetly, but also contently as he read through several good essays, the only "poor" one being from the Inuzaka girl, but still receiving a 'C'. Iruka's contentment grew at his student's great work and he then decided he was going to give them a fun day tomorrow. However he was uncertain of how exactly to do that without killing himself or harming others… _'Ah well, I'll come up with it later,'_ with that "figured out", Iruka went on to figuring out what he missed, the files needed, and other stuff for the mission room. He sighed as he knew he actually had to go to the mission room so he won't be over-whelmed tomorrow. The upside was he didn't have to work the mission room today even if he got home at 4 o' clock._ 'Speaking of, what time is it now?'_ as he looked in the kitchen he was surprised it was already five-thirty. _'Only 30 more minutes… I should go the mission room now, and then go to Kakashi's apartment. But, I don't want him to think I come at the same time all the time… I think I'll hold off and arrive at about seven tonight… can't stay long though, hum…'_ Iruka sighed as he realized he thought too much. He was seriously missing out on a lot because he had to think so much. Regardless, he slipped on his sandals and examined his apartment before he left. His eyes fell on a certain picture as he scanned his apartment.

It was the picture of Naruto, Sasuke, Sakura, and none-other than Kakashi whom was haunting his thoughts often as of late. He couldn't help but remember the fourth hokage, or at least what he could when he was so young. He remembered the brilliant smile of Minato before the Kyuubi came, the one and only time he saw that smile. He was with a woman. Iruka thought it was his wife. His eyes darkened upon remembering watching his parents fight.

"_Iruka… are you alright…?"_

"_Pa! Ma's…!" _

"_Leave your Ma to me! You go hide, now!"_

"_No! I don't wanna leave you and Ma behind! I'll defend Ma!"_

"_Don't push me, boy! It's the parents' duty to protect their children!"_

Iruka felt that he always remembered tears as his father said those last words… he couldn't say anything to that. Before he could leave himself, he was snatched up by a random ninja. He could only shout an "I love you Ma and Pa!" as he was carried away. Iruka smiled slightly though, at least those were his last words to them. He sighed quietly knowing reminiscing about those old times was not exactly the best thing to do. With that he flicked off the light and proceeded to the mission room.

He enjoyed the afternoon atmosphere of the village, watched children being called in by their parents, saw a few ninjas –both male and female— exchanging 'welcome home' kisses, and thoroughly enjoyed the nature of Konoha. Times like these he realized why he did everything he did for the village, including putting his life on the line. The chuunin frowned as he realized he wanted someone to return home to, though. It wasn't an acute need though. In fact he realized he only felt this way somewhat recently. The tanned man just shook his head getting rid of all negative thoughts as he finally stepped into the mission room.

"Iruka-kun! Where were you? We were worried," Izumo said as soon as he saw the chuunin.

'_The fact you guys worry about me not working ought' to tell me something…'_

"Ah, just taking a day off. I need a break every once in a while you know!" the chuunin replied, attempting to laugh it off.

"Ah… well why are you here now then?"

Iruka only gave the man a look that easily told him that if the chuunin wasn't aware of what was happening or where they were, the mission room and system would fall apart.

Izumo only sheepishly smiled and nodded, "ah… that is true… well currently we have 19 D-ranks, 17 C-ranks, 8 B-ranks, and 3 A-ranks."

"Only 3?"

"Yeah. We are a little short right now…"

'_How can you be short when Kakashi is off-duty?... But I suppose he takes all the S-ranks instead. I'm glad the mission room doesn't hand out S-ranks and those are only assigned by the Hokage though… I couldn't imagine giving someone a scroll we both knew they had a questionable chance of coming back from…'_ the chuunin sighed as he found he never really liked the way missions were handled. Every grade and/or category of each mission was split up into the respective ranks from 'D' to 'S'. S ranks were well-known for changing outcomes of wars, or preventing wars altogether. They also tended to have something to do with getting new power from jutsu or weapons- often forbidden and obtained for the only reason to seal away and hide it from other villages or rogue groups such as the Akatsuki. As such, because of the high risk rate, only sixty percent of the missions ended in success. Whereas the other forty is usually from the mission ending in failure right before success. For example, Iruka knew that those missions were a failure at the end, because the one carrying it out usually was killed while putting up a valiant effort. Iruka could only shake his head at the ruthlessness of Konoha's elders.

"Iruka-kun?"

"Huh? Oh… yeah. I've just been thinking a lot today." _'Too much,'_ he added in his head spitefully.

"Oh… well, also Anko-chan is currently back in the village without any missions. And I'm sure you're aware Kurenai-chan, Asuma-san, and Gai-san are also lacking in the mission department?"

Iruka nodded in affirmation though mentally dreaded tomorrow if Anko decided to get a mission.

"Well, those are the only problem jounin inactive right now. Hokage said she had few missions too. Said missions were coming at a slow pace."

"So that means we should expect a flood soon?"

Izumo nodded in turn.

"I see… Any scrolls, requirements, rules, or anything I need to look over?"

"Not yet Iruka-kun."

"Very well… thank you Izu-kun."

He nodded and smiled cheerfully, then paused. Iruka knew he was about to ask something uncomfortable, "um… Iruka-kun? Would you care to join Kotetsu, Genma, Raidou, and I for drinks tonight? You don't have to drink! Just… for fun?"

If Iruka didn't know any better, he'd think Izumo was asking him out on a date, but he smiled as they were trying to simply to get him to be more social. "I already have plans Izu-kun. Sorry. But next time if I don't have anything going, sure!"

Izumo simply smiled not even expecting any form of a 'yes'. "Very well, have a good night Iruka-kun!"

Iruka only smiled and waved back at the man as he left. He was the unofficial manager of the mission room and was surprised he didn't have anything to look over, which left only one thing to do. _'Hope you are expecting me, Kakashi…'_ Iruka thought as he headed towards the man's apartment.

He enjoyed the quiet, but fresh walk. He also had his guard very high up as he was "attacked" by Ibiki and Mitsurgui. It taught him he shouldn't even have it entirely down in the village. As he walked he found he was almost bubbling with excitement.

'_This is ridiculous, I feel like a pre-genin girl right now going over to her best friend's house…'_ Iruka sighed trying to ignore just how excited he was getting. _'You just have so much to say, Kakashi… I haven't seen you in a bit too! Ugh, this is ridiculous! It's like any other time, idiot.'_ As he attempted to console his feelings as he walked, he found he was in front of the Jounin's door. He knocked politely letting the man know he was here, then walked in without awaiting a reply. He knew knocking itself was un-needed as the man could easily sense his chakra, but he was polite anyway. However, upon entering he found a heavily used Kitchen, several bowls –some with water he'd consider drinking—, and the shower going.

'_Erm, are you showering?... Perhaps I'll just wait here? But based on what I'm seeing his dogs are the reason for all of this… Ah, I'll just check the bathroom.'_ He idly realized that he was getting extremely comfortable with the man if he was just wondering around like this. Upon arriving at the bathroom door he knocked, found it was open, and opened it a crack to make sure he wasn't impeding on private space. However, what he saw made him fully open the door and stare wide-eyed, completely shocked.

Kakashi's back was facing him and he was giving Akino the petting of his life. What struck the man the most though, was that all eight dogs were inside the small bathroom, the entire room was soaked and sudsy, and the man was shirtless, mask-less, and was being more domestic than Iruka ever thought capable of him. He didn't see Kakashi's face (and mentally thanked Kami for that) but Iruka knew based on the man's completely toned body that he was extremely attractive, even for ninja standards. Iruka could only gape like a fish as he realized he just stumbled in on a very private moment.

However, as he stared the other dogs finally noticed him and stared back, surprised. Which of course Kakashi noticed, and Iruka could tell the moment Kakashi realized someone just came in without alerting him in the least. His entire back stiffened and he slid on his mask faster than Iruka could see. He then turned around extremely quickly and locked eyes with the chuunin. Iruka saw pure shock and surprise from the even grey and red eyes. They could only stare at each other purely embarrassed. Iruka ignored Akino righting himself and looking extremely cool despite being covered in bubbles and his hair rustled to an un-manageable mess. The silence was finally broken by Iruka, "I-I-I-I-I'm sorry, I-I apologize. I will come back later," he managed through stutters, shock, and embarrassment. With that he tried leaving immediately, about to slam the door when Kakashi grabbed his wrist.

"Wait! It's fine… I was just- giving the pack a bath… I didn't expect you until much later," the masked man said then let a silence pass for several minutes. Iruka was now a red that rivaled apples. The surprisingly attractive man was soaked and the water was dripping off his chest, body, and hair. The man's usually gravity defying hair was now limp and almost hung low like a woman's long hair. Iruka didn't quite realize how attractive the man was until now, and upon realizing he thought _Kakashi_ was attractive he turned ever-redder. Kakashi would usually tease the man, but was too surprised to actually have it in him.

"Uuuuh, could you close the door please? I don't want to have to dry the carpet in the hall…"

Iruka could only manage a nod as he closed the door, assuming Kakashi wanted him to stay. He wondered briefly how the entire bathroom got so soaked, ceiling, wall, and all. In fact it seemed the only thing not soaked was him. And he knew that would change quickly.

"U-uhm, Iruka? You don't have to if you don't want too, but you should take off everything you don't want to get wet and put it outside… Y-you don't have too, but I just thought it would be very un-comfortable for you…" Kakashi mumbled to the ground rather than the man. _'Wait, why did I tell you to __**join**__ me?'_ Before he could dwell into thought further Iruka surprised him as he saw the man take off his hitai-ate, vest, and shirt. He held his breath as the man revealed his torso. He didn't exactly know how he felt about having another shirtless man with him in the bathroom, but sighed as it was too late now. Iruka quickly opened the door and threw the discarded clothes outside, then quickly closed the door again. He was now even redder.

"Uhm, Iruka… are you okay? You're extremely red…"

"I am, just embarrassed to death. I am so sorry I came in on you like this. I could tell this was private… I- forgive me." _'That and I just took off the same amount of clothes as you- minus the mask,' _he thought somewhat bitterly, cursing his luck. He also took the time, however, to notice a drain in the middle of the tiled floor, and the fact the entire place was filled with water to at least a quarter of the sink's height. Iruka realized Kakashi was using a jutsu to keep it contained as the shower went on ever-more, filling the place at the rate it was draining.

Kakashi only smiled his signature smile, "It's fine sensei. I trust you enough to show you this side," he stated with extreme difficulty, pausing for a long time again. At that moment the dogs that he temporarily forgot came back to life, Uhei and Urushi splashed each other, and from there chaos among the dogs erupted. They were gonna' take full advantage of this day, and now that Iruka was here, they were going to make him have as much fun as both them and Kakashi did.

Iruka blocked futilely as a wave of water crashed into him and Kakashi. He felt embarrassed to hell still, but decided to try and make the best of the worst situation. He also was some-what touched Kakashi let him into this so easily. He decided that since he was already soaked, he might as well have fun. He smiled evilly at the dogs in the tub, ran, and jumped in, grabbing Bisuke. The dogs scurried, but in the limited space were all attacked by an Iruka wave. Kakashi could only appreciate the man as the wave also hit him. _'You take everything in stride, Iruka. I like that about you…'_

But he was then pushed into the miniature pool on the floor by Guruko and he laughed and grabbed the mutt, petting him and washing him deeply at the same time, but aggressively to where it was fun. Uhei jumped out of the tub and tackled Kakashi as Iruka aggressively washed and pet the little Bisuke. They continued the chaos, fun, splashing, and jumping for quite some time before they all had to float on the water and relax, breathing deeply and feeling quite tired. Pakkun was the only one that mostly stayed out of it. Of course his brothers picked on him and he had to do something to retaliate. He avoided as much as he could though. At some point in time Kakashi discarded his mask and just had fun. The mask was getting far too uncomfortable anyway. As he slowly floated on the water in the limited room of the bathroom, he could only smile to himself and laugh gently. He couldn't recall having this much fun ever. He personally believed it was because Iruka tackled and wrestled with him. That human contact that wasn't threatening he couldn't remember feeling since Minato and Obito. It was simply just fun and warmed a much-needed part in him. _'Quitting ANBU was definitely worth all of this…'_

"Kakashi? Is everyone washed? Including ourselves?" the chuunin asked while laughing warmly. _'I didn't expect this visit to turn out like this… but I don't recall having as much fun as this in a long time…'_

Kakashi also laughed and easily stood back up as they were in only about two- maybe three feet of water. "I would think so, sensei."

The scarred chuunin stood back up as well and laid his eyes on Kakashi again. He however didn't expect the fully un-masked Kakashi to have such handsome features. In response to the first-ever sight (he was too distracted to notice earlier), his eyes widened to almost frightening sizes. Kakashi could only raise a brow as he realized he felt a breeze on his face. He immediately widened his eyes in shock and covered his face with his hands, turning a surprising shade of red. No one since his old team has ever seen him without his mask. No one.

Iruka immediately looked away blushing and closing his eyes as if he just witnessed a tragedy unfold. "I'm so sorry Kakashi, I didn't realize…"

"It's fine sensei… I didn't either. I just… I don't want this yet… I'm sorry."

"I understand. I didn't see anything anyway…"

Both Kakashi and Iruka knew that was a lie, and that the image was imprinted on Iruka's mind, but they liked to pretend otherwise.

"It's fine. By the way sensei, your hair is down."

It was Iruka's turn to open his eyes shocked and feel for his ponytail. But of course only his hair was down. It was like they were both un-masked and they had no idea what to do about it. Kakashi found that he actually greatly liked the image of this scene in his head, and was glad his Sharingan was out. Both of them standing in slightly high water, uniform issue pants on both of them, Iruka's hair down, his mask off- it was a strange form of perfection in his mind. He also noticed the tanned man's impressive physique for a school teacher, but that was more-so his pervert mind registering all the details. He was never attracted to males as long as he could remember. He was able to appreciate a man's body, but he didn't ever have desire to pursue one. He just found his best friend was extremely easy on the eyes. The chuunin in turn scratched his scar shyly, a blush on his face which in turn made Kakashi remember his own blush. He sighed as they somehow were able to get in extremely awkward positions with each other surprisingly easy. _'I'm so un-used to a friendship like this. It reminds me too much of Obito…'_

"Uhm, we should probably clean the bathroom up, and dry ourselves off," his pack barked, "and the pack," he added. He also took the time to fetch his soaked and clingy mask, putting it back on. He could replace it extremely soon, as soon as the bathroom was drained and clean. With that he turned off the shower and sat on the edge of the tub, smiling shyly at the man in the interior of it.

"Gotta' wait for it to drain before anything…"

"Ah," Iruka replied, nodding. He let the silence stretch out some.

"Thank you for coming over Iruka. I really was expecting you later, but now I'm," he paused trying to find the right words to express his feelings towards the entire day, and his friend, "er… happy you came early."

Iruka smiled warmly at Kakashi, which in turn almost uncharacteristically melted. _'I actually got another smile from you like that…'_

"I'm glad too."

"Good. And sensei?"

"Mm?"

"You look good with your hair down," the jounin teased lightly, laughing as Iruka blushed and punched Kakashi on the shoulder some-what hard. The jounin couldn't express the happiness he was feeling, so only kept a permanent and wide smile on, feeling goofy.

The water finally drained and Kakashi left the room as Iruka idly pet all eight dogs, whom in turn groaned in pleasure and tried getting the most attention from the teacher, fighting amongst each other all-the-while.

The jounin returned with a seemingly excessively amount of towels. "Alright, first the dogs, then us."

"We are _not_ just _dogs_," Akino assured the teacher. Kakashi only rolled his eyes as they always assured otherwise- all the time. With that he stooped back down and started drying the largest dog thoroughly. Iruka felt a bit awkward, but knew he just had to take it all in stride as he currently was. He grabbed Bisuke, –currently his favorite to pet— and dried him leisurely, switching his attention onto Guruko after Bisuke was mostly dry. Kakashi worked on Akino "respectfully" as the dog didn't like being taken like a normal dog, and preferred to be acknowledged as a ninja. After those dogs, Iruka moved onto Pakkun, then Uhei, as Kakashi worked on Urushi and Shiba. Having all the dogs dried, Kakashi finally moved onto drying himself, but winced at his bruises on his back. Those also didn't feel very healed compared to his chest and arm bruises.

"Kakashi? Come here, let me help you with that," the brunet said upon seeing the man wince. The masked man didn't feel very comfortable as he realized everything he did with the chuunin in the span of a few hours. _'Am I really that used to you?'_ he idly thought as he sighed, but walked over to the man. He sat on the toilet seat turned away from the chuunin as he felt a light fabric and touch dry his back. He shivered involuntarily at the intimate and almost un-wanted touch. Even his trust was going too far for him. Regardless he tried relaxing into the sensation as Iruka lightly mopped up his back. The tan man only focused intently, entirely professional as he took great care in drying the bruises on the man's back. Now that he thought about it, the old brutally mottled skin now almost was entirely the normal pale shade it should be. However the man's back still had a few patches of unsettling purple and blue. If he didn't know any better, he'd think the man might have bruised the bone _and_ muscle. Regardless, the man finally finished and set the towel down lightly.

"You have to be very gentle with your back Kakashi. If you aggravate the bruises you're gonna be in for a world of hurt."

Kakashi could only raise an eyebrow at the tiled floor, "and when did you become so proficient in bruises, Iruka?"

"I deal with pre-genin, and dealt with Naruto. You should know why," the teacher replied almost heatedly.

The silver-haired man realized that those bruises of Naruto's were in excess and _not_ from simply tripping. That's why Iruka was getting so aggressive. Well, the man's voice anyway.

"Sorry Iruka…"

The man sighed, deflating, "It's not your fault in the least. I'm just bothered by the old times."

"Hn," the man replied while nodding.

"Anyway, I'm pretty sure everyone is dry now. Shall I go start dinner?"

Kakashi could only grin widely as he stood up, "yes please sensei," he said to the academy teacher with a slight wink. Iruka could only blush a bit as he just shook his head in what Kakashi saw as a 'stupid jounin,' expression.

"Excuse me as I change," he said, then widened his eyes as Iruka probably needed a wardrobe change too. "Ah, um… would you like any clothes?" the man looked away as he sighed knowing it was getting awkward again, "I have a few extra…"

"Oh, um… yes please, I didn't bring any extra clothes," he replied as he also awkwardly looked away and stared at the bathroom's tile. _'Ugh, we need to get used to each other in ways like this right now! But, I don't really know him all that well…'_ the teacher sighed and rubbed his forehead as he knew they just needed time.

"Alright, I'll be right back then. Settle yourself in."

"Alright."

With that they both left the bathroom trailed by the pack. Kakashi went into his room and Iruka went into the kitchen. While the chuunin was looking around in the fridge, he noticed Kakashi ate some of his left-over favorites. He smiled, and then withdrew enough ingredients to make two standard Bento Box meals, but of course he was going to add his own spices and what Genma referred to as "flair". He started the rice first and then watched as the pack all scattered around the living room and couch, settling in for what Iruka could guess as a long and wonderful nap to end the day.

Kakashi on the other hand, put all the soiled clothes in a hamper, setting Iruka's to the side for the chuunin to take when he left. _'Oh… you're gonna' have to leave huh?'_ the jounin realized to a surprising amount of disappointment. He glanced at the clock and his eyes widened as he saw the little device was now showing him a cheery 10:30pm. _'Has that much time really passed?'_ the man thought to himself in great surprise. Time seemed to do that often anytime he was with the chuunin. He then glared wickedly at his clock as he realized it loved to pass time when he didn't want it to, and go slower than a snail when he wanted it to speed up. _'Bastard,'_ he thought with a glare as he found he was wishing again that he could control time. _'Well, Iruka isn't aware of what time it is, and I'm going to pretend that I am not either!'_ he thought, not even feeling slightly guilty. With that he withdrew an old pair of pants from his uniform and what he thought as his teen years. He also fished around for an old shirt, but couldn't find any old ones. Instead the man just withdrew a jounin shirt as he didn't own any civilian clothing. _'Wait, your shirt is perfectly dry… I'll just give that to you then.'_ With that decided he took the clothes, replaced his mask and pants, then left to enter the living room. He was greeted by the smell of something already cooking, and found his mouth watered a bit on its own.

"I brought you some clothes, Iruka. You already know where the bathroom is," the man said with a slight laugh. Iruka in turn only blushed slightly and laughed quietly to himself. Kakashi found him in the kitchen, watching his dogs set themselves up for a long rest. Iruka walked out from behind the counter and grabbed the clothes Kakashi found for him with a slight smile.

"Thank you," he said as he quickly headed to the bathroom to change. Kakashi could only take a large breath at the events of the day, and that they were still going indefinitely. _'This was definitely worth quitting ANBU for… which I should tell Iruka, but would that make him feel guilty?' _Kakashi thought to himself with slight concern. He knew the man enough by now to know he would feel guilty, but before he could dwell on it further the man emerged in extremely loose pants –Kakashi's, of course— and his standard chuunin shirt. The man seemed to be blushing lightly, but to Kakashi's great surprise he felt extremely possessive of the man- like he wanted to protect him. He glared mentally at his dogs as he knew they were rubbing off on him if he felt like that because the chuunin was wearing his clothes.

"Ah, I look fine right? ...These pants just seem incredibly loose…" the chuunin said as he stared down at aforementioned pants.

"You look fine. You aren't going anywhere anyway."

"Ah, true," the teacher awarded Kakashi with a smile, then his eyes turned alert as he shot to the kitchen. "My rice! Oh god, I hope it's fine…" he said as he vigorously stirred the food. He smiled and sighed in relief as he found they were entirely fine, in fact they were done. The chuunin then dumped half the contents of the pan onto one plate, then the rest onto another. He then started cooking some meat for the both of them. Kakashi only leaned on the counter and watched, ignoring the fact he was still shirtless as compared to the chuunin, and was only giddy at getting some more home-cooked food. He actually considered it "Iruka-cooked" food, since his home cooking only included a dog's meal. Well- eight dog's meals. But he'd been making them food since he was a chuunin, so he didn't really count that.

He watched as Iruka fished around what he called the "freezer" which made sense as everything in there did become frozen, but he never used it so was un-sure. The chuunin withdrew some kind of green stuff and threw it in the microwave. Kakashi only raised a brow as the chuunin rarely used the microwave. The chuunin commented over his shoulder: "Eh, I can't make everything from scratch." Kakashi could only chuckle to himself. "The great Iruka can't make everything from scratch? Un-heard of!" the chuunin in turn only pointed at him "threateningly", "Hey, watch it. I control the fate of your empty stomach." The man pouted in turn, "So cruel, sensei…" Iruka only rolled his eyes dramatically, but Kakashi could tell he was suppressing a wide smile and laugh. He decided to elicit a laugh he hadn't heard in a bit.

"Honestly, my poor stomach can't handle such crude torture!"

"Oh hush, you're an 'almighty ninja, master of 1,000 jutsu!'" the scarred man said, parroting the comments several make of the legendary jounin.

Kakashi smirked, this could be fun.

"Oh! But the cruel fate of my life has denied me the almighty 'insta-feed no jutsu'!" he even put his hand on his forehead, remembering the gesture from one of his books.

Iruka couldn't fight it any longer, he burst out laughing at the ridiculous jounin with apparently "no sense of humor".

" 'Insta-feed no jutsu?' " he asked through the tears in his eyes at the ridiculous jutsu.

"Well haven't you heard of it? Rumor says it is able to quickly quench any bottomless pit, even an Akimichi's!"

Iruka decided to play along, and feigned surprise, "An_ Akimichi?_ Unheard of! They are in fact bottomless pits!"

"Oh, yes. It's quite a powerful jutsu. Rumor has it the third hokage sealed it away in fear that it would unleash chaos among clans!"

Iruka put a hand over his mouth, "_C__haos!_"

"Oh yes, Iruka-sensei. Massive, full-blown, _chaos_."

"Wow! Good thing you have been denied such unfathomable power!"

"Oh yes, they say only one other thing can compare to the happiness this forbidden jutsu causes."

"And what would that be?"

"An 'Iruka-sensei's' cooking!"

"WHAT?"

"YES!"

"Who is this man! He must be under great protection!"

"Alas, no one realizes this man's power and leaves him un-protected!"

"How tragic!"

For some reason, Kakashi dropped most of the charade, but kept in character, "Indeed! They say only one person protects him with his life…"

Iruka smiled as he took a step closer to the silver-haired man, also staying in character. He for some reason wasn't very shocked at all. "Who is this strange person?"

"Kakashi Hatake," the man stated honestly and smiled at the chuunin sincerely. He grabbed Iruka's arm, and pulled the man closer.

"A scarecrow protecting his treasure? How fitting." Iruka replied, smiling sincerely back at the man. He knew the man was confessing how much he cared about him, and honestly he couldn't help but feel at ease. He allowed himself to get closer.

"Yes, they say he tries to fight off all that threatens this man with the cooking powers rivaled only by forbidden jutsu," the jounin said as he pulled Iruka into a hug. He found his eyes closed of their own accord as he held the man close.

"What a great man…" Iruka replied as he held the jounin close. He knew why Kakashi was doing this, he wanted to clearly state his feelings that Iruka always suspected. The chuunin sighed contently as he knew he found an irreplaceable friend. Kakashi stated it himself: he would protect Iruka with his life.

"Thank you, Kakashi. I'm still sorry for how I treated you. I had no idea…" Iruka knew the man was also clearly stating how trusted he was, and for that he had to thank him.

"It's fine Iruka," he said as he let go. He realized the man still had his hair down, and for some reason Kakashi found that it seemed to almost soften the chuunin. "By the way, I think the legendary cook's food is close to burning," he said with a mischievous laugh.

He heard the chuunin swear colorfully and quickly let go, as Kakashi widened his eyes realizing what a mouth the chuunin had, he laughed even more to himself. Iruka retrieved a plate of extremely crisp, but not quite burnt meat and set it down on the plate along with what he was preparing in the microwave. Kakashi saw it was Broccoli. Not his favorite, but he didn't mind too much. Not after the chuunin worked so hard and often _making _him food. _'Why did I feel a need to tell Iruka that? I didn't even realize my feelings until we got into that goofy conversation…'_ the man sighed as he figured it was just another effect of caring for someone a lot. It alarmed him that he was beginning to care so rapidly, though. Enough to where he seriously considered putting an entire halt on the rapid progression of the friendship. However, he knew he would be able to stop Iruka entirely, and his wishes would be respected if his boundaries were pushed too far. Comforted by that, he allowed the progression to continue. He felt like it was going to stay this way for a while anyway. He ignored what any further advancement might bring.

"Well, our dinner is ready," the chuunin announced with a yawn. "Geez, what time is it? It feels like it's almost midnight or something…"

"I have no clue," the jounin replied, ignoring the panic threatening to well-up.

"Huh… can you check? You have a clock right? I have to get to the academy tomorrow as well as work the mission room… " the chuunin trailed off, as he gave the plate of food to Kakashi.

"Maaaa, can't we just eat first and then worry about the time? The food is ready anyway."

The chuunin looked thoughtful, even slightly suspicious, but nodded anyway, "Alright."

They made their way to the couch, Iruka sitting away from the jounin allowing him to freely eat. The chuunin just relaxed and ate as he thought to himself, enjoying his simple meal. _'Hrm, die for me, eh? That's actually kind of frightening Kakashi. I'm not used to such a quickly progressing friendship. But for some reason it is just so simply easy to do with you… even if I am embarrassed to the point of burying myself multiple times, I know all of this is new to you as well,' _the chuunin sighed to himself as he put a piece of the meat in his mouth and chewed.

Kakashi blinked steadily as he realized the chuunin and himself had a system already for when they ate. It was their quiet time, and Iruka slid into his thinking mode easier than Kakashi had ever seen. Regardless, he slowly slid down his mask and dug into the meal appreciating the simplicity of it, but the deliciousness of it at the same time. _'I'm shocked at my actions all day if I'm honest with myself… I mean, I let you in with me and the pack during one of our rare times together filled with only fun and care without a second thought! You were right in that it was a very personal time. Then on top of that I took off my mask as we got lost in the fun, and simply enjoyed wrestling and being with you. Then to top it off you actually saw my face! I just couldn't bring myself to let you see my true self for any longer than accidentally necessary… At least I know I'm not losing my mind. I still can't show you my face. But you already saw it, and I already said I'd die to protect you… I don't even know where THAT came from! It was just so natural to say, I just- I just don't know or understand why I feel so much for you already. It's clear you are "special" to me already though, so I won't freak out about that. It's just a fact of life at this point. Perhaps I can manage to show you my face tonigh__t..?__' _the man sighed at his own chaotic thoughts as he realized most of his food was almost gone already. He savored the last few bites and returned to his thoughts. _'Maybe I'll try and show you. I just can't handle you seeing the face and true colors of me, the __**demon**__… but I think you deserve to know,'_ with that figured out and his food consumed, he realized Iruka set his plate down a while ago- already done, but was still staring off thinking about who knows what. _'I guess there are not anymore excuses,'_ "I'm ready Iruka," he said without pulling his mask back up. The man snapped out of his thoughts and as soon as he was about to turn, Kakashi realized he couldn't do it. He couldn't show Iruka the monster he was, and so shamefully slid his mask on easily as Iruka turned.

"Did you like the food?" he asked with a smile.

"Yeah, it was very good. Nice choice sensei," he said with a wink. But as he winked he realized why he was so easily able to care and do what he has for the teacher, he had a mask to hide behind the entire time in case he messed up. He could just disappear behind the barrier without consequence. The thought pained the Sharingan user as he felt it was unfair, and even cruel. Leaving Iruka out to show himself for who he was while he hid behind a mask. And with that he realized Iruka didn't even really know him well at all. _'Our friendship doesn't make sense… we know almost nothing of each other- well, we don't know much, and yet I'd lay my life down for him… I need to let him in even further. I need to completely reciprocate the openness he has given me… One step at a time is the best thing to do right now.'_

As if reading his mind, the chuunin spoke-up, "Kakashi, I wanted to ask you if I could get to know you a bit better… I just wanted to know more about you because you are a good friend, and it simply would help me. I'm not making much sense, am I?"

"Not really, but I agree. Only if I get to know you better too," Kakashi replied with a mischievous smirk.

"Alright. How about we trade questions one-by-one?"

Kakashi nodded in reply.

"Alright… Hm, let's agree not to ask anything too personal until we're ready."

Kakashi nodded again, muttering a 'hn', while changing his position to lean on the couch's arm.

"Good… Ah, how about we start easy," the man paused as he thought, "er, what's your favorite method of attack…?" Iruka felt unsure about himself and sighed at his miserable question. _'Method of attack? __**Really**__?'_

Kakashi only raised his eye, surprised at the question. "Method of attack? Well, I prefer quick and very clean executions, but I suppose a fall back would have to be either: messing with and watching the enemy destroy themselves, or a barrage of ninjutsu. Taijutsu involves too great of risk for me to prefer it. But, of course, I partake in it quickly as I prefer conserving my extremely limited chakra more."

Iruka smiled as Kakashi actually answered, making him feel far less idiotic. "Interesting. Well, I suppose it's your turn."

Kakashi looked up in thought and recalled a question he answered that the chuunin hasn't yet, but he could guess. "What's your favorite food?"

"You should already know, but Ramen. Specifically from Ichiraku."

Kakashi laughed to himself silently as he pretty much knew that. "Hmm, as expected. Your turn Iruka."

Iruka smirked as he now had the chance to delve a bit deeper, but he decided to keep it safe- didn't want to scare the man away from future questioning situations. "Hmm, what's your favorite color?"

Kakashi could only widen his eyes at the simple question, but answered anyway. "Ah, well, I don't really actually know, Iruka… I guess Navy Blue because that's what I wear most…" Kakashi sighed as he found he really had no clue. _'You don't even know what color you like the most, honestly how can you call yourself human?'_

Iruka noticed Kakashi's significantly darkening mood, but decided not to push him. "It's your turn now. Blue is a nice color though."

Kakashi sighed again as he still really wasn't sure, but regardless tried to think of something. _'Hmmm, maybe I'll push my luck…'_ "Ah, how did you get that scar on your nose? And also, what's your favorite color?" he managed to say, though hoped he wasn't pushing it too far already.

"My scar?" Iruka blushed slightly as that story was indeed delving a bit deeper as far as questions went, "by the way Kakashi, that was two questions. I get an extra one. Well, the easier question to answer is my favorite color, and that is leaf green and aquamarine. I can't decide between the two," he said while laughing softly. "You know, if you combine them in a gem of sorts it would probably be my favorite. Ahem, on to my scar… I was about six years old- a stray kunai cut me deeply and the scar stayed ever since. My mother couldn't leave my side after that for a while," the chuunin finished with a shy laugh.

"Oh, I see. How- never mind, I have my next question," the masked man said with a slight smile. "Your turn."

"Hmm, well how about," Iruka paused to think, _'this one isn't too invasive because I'm only asking about it, not the details.'_ "Have you had any relationships?"

That question caught Kakashi a bit off guard, but he answered easily, "No. None."

"Really? But you have half the population of Konoha swooning at your feet."

"Doesn't mean I like any of them. They just want to know what's underneath my mask, they do not actually care about me."

Iruka winced slightly and involuntarily at that, because he knew it was probably true. "I see… Your turn. By the way, I'm using my two questions next. You have one normal turn," Iruka chuckled softly at that because it felt as if they were playing a card game.

"Hmm, how did you get the scar? I mean, what specific event led to that stray kunai flying?"

Iruka widened his eyes slightly as he realized they were progressively getting deeper and deeper, he didn't quite mind but hoped his next two questions wouldn't be too much.

"Ah, well when I was young I used to be very popular among the kunoichi and older ninjas. My parents often took me to other family's houses just because everyone wanted to talk with me –the kids that is— and my parents –the other adults and older ninja—. I guess everyone just liked our warm attitude. Well, my father wasn't quite warm, but he was kind. He was sort of like a social Ibiki…"

"That's actually very interesting, continue?"

"Well, quite simply spending time around older ninjas meant spending time around a lot of training. I was too young to be fully aware of the danger, and as such the kunai got me. My mother didn't leave my side so she could fend off any more "attacks"." Iruka finished with a heartfelt laugh that caused Kakashi to grin.

"Well, your turn."

"Alright," _'please don't hate me…'_ he thought before starting. "First off, how did you go on through the years? I mean, would you consider the majority of your life any form of good? And if not, and if you are willing to answer, why? Sorry if I'm starting to over-step…"

"That is a more difficult question," the man said as he stared at the floor for a bit _'I'll try my best to answer though…'_ "Well, quite simply no. My father," he couldn't bring himself to tell that truth quite yet, "wasn't around. My mother died when I was young. I barely remember her. Also, I found that I've devoted myself a bit too entirely to Konoha. I was," Kakashi hoped he could continue being able to share, and that ANBU wouldn't get him for stating he used to be in it, "in ANBU for a very long time. From about sixteen to twenty-two. I then quit, but re-joined later. I've been in it the second time from twenty-seven to twenty-eight. I just quit yesterday."

Iruka was listening contently, but sputtered upon hearing the man just quit. "WHAT? YESTERDAY!"

"Ah, yeah," he scratched the back of his neck nervously, "I thought about it a lot and realized I had to quit." He didn't want Iruka to know he also quit ANBU for him, he felt that would overwhelm Iruka, and by extension himself.

Iruka could only rub his forehead, "I can't believe you just told me that… I don't think ANBU would approve of it-" but then he saw the tattoo on Kakashi's tricep and smacked his forehead. "Ah, you have the tattoo, I suppose it doesn't matter anyway. But, just… wow. I can't believe you _just_ quit! I mean- You never know when someone quits…"

"Ah, yeah," from there Kakashi simply just watched the nearby floor, letting a silence fill the air, unsure of what to say.

The chuunin then spoke up, "You haven't answered why, but you really don't need to. I can just tell and guess."

The silver-haired jounin let out a sigh of relief as he greatly didn't want to go into why those events made his life so bad. He could only evade the exact truth for so long, as he didn't want to lie to the man. "Thank you, Iruka," he said gratefully.

The man merely let out a 'hn' in acknowledgement while nodding. "It's your turn. You can ask one or two questions; I don't mind."

The copy ninja didn't really feel comfortable letting Iruka ask more than one question at a time, so he simply nodded and tried to think of a question. After a while he finally figured something out. "Ah, what are your feelings about a ninja that failed in the completion of a mission?"

He saw Iruka's eyebrows raise in what he guessed was surprise, but he answered anyway, "Why did they fail? I need that to answer fully."

"Uhm, because they chose to save comrades."

"I'd consider them a hero, then. You can't leave those who fight by your side as wary of death as you. It's cowardly to let them fall while you live- even to complete a mission. Ninjas must save their comrades if they can," the tanned man replied with a certain look in his eyes. Kakashi found he liked the response more than he'd care to admit. _'Thank you for teaching me, Obito.'_

"Ah. I see. That's good. I feel the same way mostly. It is just that when a mission that absolutely must be completed and your comrades sacrifice themselves for the success of it, you must complete it at all costs!"

"Yeah, you're right."

Kakashi only smiled at the teacher. He found the conversation was getting easy to continue and greatly liked learning more about the man. If he was honest with himself he would've liked to continue it all night, but knew there was always the next day to do so. Well, as long as they didn't go on missions. He learned very well that there were not always 'tomorrows' for ninja. He actually would've lost all of his tomorrows if it wasn't for Iruka. He was still somewhat bothered that had it not been for him peeking in on the chuunin's class he would've died on his most recent mission. He felt that fate was being a bit too convenient.

"It's getting late Kakashi, I have one more question for you, then we can continue this tomorrow or something."

"What is it?"

"I apologize for being so forward, but why do you wear a mask?"

Kakashi stiffened. This was the exact time he was thankful he knew he could stop the chuunin without consequence, "I'm sorry Iruka, but I feel that I can't tell you that about me yet…"

The chuunin only smiled sweetly, "Ah it's fine. I felt I was over-stepping anyway. I apologize. You have no reason to feel bad. I will not probe what you do not wish to disclose with me. Just takes time to trust someone fully. I understand that, and personally I thank you for answering all that I have asked."

Kakashi, though his heart was beating rapidly, smiled at the understanding teacher. "Thank you."

"No problem, but I really should go now. I feel as if it's extremely late. What's the time on your clock say anyway?"

"Ah- I actually don't know… Let me check," the jounin said as he quickly got up and walked into his room, checking the time. To his shock it was displaying a somehow cheery 2:00am. _'T-two… in the morning? How do I get so lost on time with you… Oooh, I don't want to tell you…'_ the jounin sighed however, knowing he had too. _'Hope you don't get angry…'_

With that found out he walked back into the living room, sheepishly rubbing the back of his neck, "Um, Iruka… It's currently two o' one in the morning," he said, looking at the floor, waiting for the outburst. Upon hearing no screaming for an extended time, though, he looked up and saw Iruka wide-eyed and gaping.

"H-how, did the time pass like this…?"

Kakashi could only offer a bare-armed shrug.

"I need rest right now… I have to get up in four hours for the academy, and then… oooooooh," was all Iruka could mutter as he rubbed his forehead. _'How could this happen? I was just talking to you and arrived about five hours ago…' _he couldn't comprehend how time got so lost on him, and could only blame the jounin he was talking too.

Kakashi had no idea what to do, so without thinking said, "Perhaps you can stay here? It's close to everything… and has a lot of short-cuts to the academy while being close to the academy still?"

Iruka could only continue to rub his forehead in stress, "Kakashi, I don't have anything to wear, lunch to eat, time to spare, or _anything_ I need if I stay here. The only benefit is that it's close to where I need to be. But compared to the fact I have absolutely _nothing_, I honestly don't think I can. I'd rather walk the thirty minutes to my house and be prepared then be in such a disorganized mess tomorrow. I'm sorry, but I truly do not think I can. And haven't I stayed long enough?" Iruka didn't mean the last part to sound so angry, but he was stressed and accidentally let it out.

Kakashi winced at the anger, and found it hurt him, his heart was acting up again in reply to Iruka, and that was the worst thing that could happen around the chuunin teacher. He could only let out a quiet, "I'm sorry," as he locked his eyes onto the floor. He forgot how much it could hurt now that he actually cared about Iruka. It was so out of his character to react like this he found he was getting progressively angry at his lack of control.

"No, it's fine. Sorry I snapped, I just have no clue what to do. This hasn't happened to me at someone else's house before…"

Kakashi felt a little calmer now, and sighed as he knew he was being irrational. He had an idea, even if it was crazy. "How about I bring you Ichiraku, get your stuff right now with teleportation jutsu, and attempt to just let you sleep now? I know you need every minute you can get for tomorrow," he trailed off hoping he wouldn't get shot down. He wasn't sure he wanted to end his night with _that._

Iruka could only raise his eyebrows in shock and skepticism. "Why would you do so much for me?"

Kakashi didn't want to answer, but realized he already sorta' told the man, "You know why," he said boldly as he looked the academy teacher in the eye with that statement.

Iruka could only loosely, though extremely tiredly, smile. "Yeah… Alright, fine. But be careful, and quick. I don't want my traps to go off, and you aren't exactly in the best attire."

The jounin lightly blushed as he was reminded of his mode of dress, but just realized Iruka decided to stay the night in his apartment. _'Well, this was unexpected… but I can't say unwelcome either.'_ He simply gave the man a salute and then, as he was about to teleport realized he wasn't exactly sure where Iruka should sleep. The couch would be hell on his back, hell on Iruka's, and they couldn't share the same bed. _'Who says you can't?' _a bratty inner Kakashi retorted. _'You're obviously very… __**comfortable**__ with him. Why can't you? Surely you can sleep facing away from each other and in slightly more clothes! I see no problem with it.'_ Kakashi mentally growled at the bratty inner Kakashi, then sighed as he made very valid points on everything. But he was just so extremely uncomfortable with having another man in his bed. It didn't matter how comfortable he was with him, there were just some boundaries he was unwilling to cross. Maybe he'd ask Iruka's opinion.

"Um, Iruka, before I go… You can't sleep on the couch, and I know you won't let me sleep on the couch, but my bed is large enough for us to ignore each other and sleep comfortably…"

"Are you asking me to sleep with you?" the chuunin asked blandly, to which Kakashi's cheeks enflamed and he found he was extremely thankful for his mask. Only problem was that he always slept with his mask off…

"No! Not in that way… I don't like you that way, and I'm pretty sure I don't like any man like that." He just realized he blundered into terribly uncomfortable territory as the chuunin only raised a brow.

"Right…"

"Fine. Sleep with me in my bed Iruka because there is no optimal alternative."

Iruka only laughed aloud, and shook his head.

"I could just go home."

"That's sub-optimal."

Iruka then rolled his eyes and just nodded.

'_Wait, did you just say yes?'_ Kakashi found he could only stare wide-eyed, but quickly gained his composure and decided to just ignore the implications as they were unnecessary, and unneeded. They were just friends spending the night because it was convenient. No other reason, or cause, to stress.

"Alright. Get comfortable and go to sleep, I'm gonna' get your stuff now," he said with a smile, waved goodbye, then poofed away.

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He reappeared in the middle of the man's living room, having remembered it from his single visit. He then lumbered around being careful to avoid the traps and to make noise that the neighbors may get suspicious of. As he walked he tried desperately avoiding the objects of the unfamiliar and _cluttered_ layout. In his mind he knew it just seemed that because of his own apartment, but regardless he hit the edges of table, or tripped on random hazards on the ground more than he'd care to admit. So much so his legs were burning by the time he actually found the man's bedroom door. He limped into the room going straight to the dresser tripping on one more hellish death trap. _'Kami, the house is gonna' kill me before the traps!'_ He then pulled open the dresser a little more aggressively than was necessary. He immediately got out a clean set of clothes, then upon realizing he had to navigate to the bathroom sighed pathetically. He avoided the original object trying to send-forth his demise now that he knew it was there, and then entered the hallway. Luckily, much like his own apartment, it was directly across the bedroom door. He then entered avoiding more stray objects on the floor, and looked around. He saw a strange collection of razor blades to the side of the sink with unwashed stained blood on it. The sight brought a lot of questions to his mind, but he knew he couldn't ask the teacher. He was supposed to get the things, not snoop!

With that in mind, he quickly gathered the remaining and necessary bathroom materials. However he accidentally glimpsed a picture of two nude males on some magazine or book of Iruka's and the sight made the man widen his eyes. He quickly averted them embarrassed and realizing Iruka had a taste for men. The thought made him extremely uncomfortable as he was gonna' sleep in the same bed as the man, but he knew not to let it affect his judgment of the man. The man, after all, was the most important figure in his life- however unsettling that may be. He sighed and shook his head knowing he was finding out too much far too fast. Not to mention personal! _'Why did Iruka let me in to see this? I suppose he doesn't really care if I do?'_ the man however just sighed as exited the bathroom. He glimpsed into the man's room again and found a windmill shuriken on the wall near his dresser. Intrigued, the man went back in and inspected the weapon. He found from what he could tell very old blood on the tip of one blade and the sight amazed him. _'That's two bloody items I've found already, Iruka... obviously blood means something to you.'_ Kakashi was more intrigued than disturbed at the sight. He however saw a collection of hair bands on top of the dresser and widened his eyes realizing he almost forgot that. _'I wonder how everyone else would react…'_ he thought as he took a hair band. He surprisingly found he was extremely un-fond of the idea of everyone seeing the man the way he saw him. With a growl he realized it was him being protective again. He didn't really like that he felt this way about the school teacher, but sighed as he realized it still didn't matter. He just cared greatly, and his promise to Iruka was quite true.

As he left the bedroom for good, closing the door this time, he wandered around the apartment –his eyes accustomed to the dark— seeing what else he could learn from simple observation. _'Well-used kitchen- obvious… several, several, several, pictures of students and friends alike, a stack of papers on the table, he actually probably just graded those. Should I bring them? But then again I don't want to take him a stack of papers he has no need for…'_ the man continued observing and also spotted an already prepared sack lunch of sorts on the table. _'Ready to leave, eh?'_ Content with what he saw, he finally teleported back to his own apartment, all of Iruka's things in tow. Well, all of Iruka's necessary hygiene and clothes.

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Upon arriving in his own living room, slightly disoriented, he limped his way to the bathroom putting all the stuff where Iruka would need it knowing the man had full intention of taking a shower and performing his morning ritual at Kakashi's apartment. The thought oddly made Kakashi smile, even slightly possessively which he was also irked at. _'You are too… claim…able..?'_ he thought with confusion. But it was the best he could come up with seeing as he was getting ever so slightly more possessive of the man. He knew the friendship wasn't typical, but found he didn't really mind. It was _his_ friendship. He thought a socially awkward person like himself _should_ have an odd friendship. Regardless, he finally got ready for bed attempting to be as quiet as possible so fore-going brushing his teeth. He simply stripped down to his boxers and slid off his mask, but realized that may not be the best attire. With a grumble he took off his boxers and slid his uniform pants back on, but then realized he sort of needed new ones. He just sighed and left the current pants on though, as he had ample time to change more appropriately and do what he should when Iruka would leave soon. He then walked into his bedroom and to his surprise found the chuunin shirtless and sleeping comfortably on his side. To Kakashi it seemed like the man took off his shirt, slid in, then promptly passed out. The silver-haired man laughed softly at that as the chuunin seemed almost cute.

The jounin decided to take after the teacher and quickly did the same thing, except he already had a lack of clothes and so just slid in and attempted to pass out. However after a time he found sleep eluded him. He realized he could only focus on the other man on the opposite side of the bed. The man's chakra was distracting as was his scent and the warmth seemingly emanating from him. He wasn't used to it at all, and as such couldn't actually fall asleep. He laid there, eyes closed and body relaxed for a long time, but the man was just so distracting. And to Kakashi's great surprise he found the warmth emanating from both of their backs was also incredibly distracting. He just couldn't sleep. Eventually after what the man thought was two hours he glanced at his clock and saw it was now 4:59am. He could only sigh as he stared at the wall across the room. The academy teacher's heat was too distracting. He eventually decided that in order to eliminate the distraction he could regulate both of their heats by getting closer, and though his logical mind was screaming at him, he inched closer and closer, though extremely slowly to the chuunin's back. He finally felt their skin touch, not much, just the spines really, and he involuntarily shivered. _'Well that's not right…'_ but, at the chuunin's warm body heat he actually found he was beginning to drift off. _'Eh. Whatever. I'll deal with anything Iruka doesn't like in the morning. At least I'll be able to sleep now…'_ and with that he drifted off. He thought he felt the man get slightly closer, almost unnoticeably, but he was too tired to care. He just fell asleep.

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**A/N:** Wow. 30 pages on Microsoft word… I've never written so much in my life o.e… Hope you guys loved it as much as I sorta' did! I love you all so much. I cannot guarantee any ridiculously long chapters like this again though. We'll see. Anyhow, REVIEW PLEASE! I worked so hard on this baby… And again, THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING AND STICKING WITH IT! Um, yeah… What do you think will happen next? ;P

P.S: I feel this chapter fails at the progression of their friendship and just in general… ugh… we shall see…

P.S.S: Unspeakable amounts of thank yous go to my beautiful beta, Ryuno-Chu. She made this chapter a lot less painful. Thank you!

P.S.S.S: How do you like the new bold words in italics as opposed to the fact that from italics, it goes to normal font to emphasize something? (I.E: _'Oh, oh... **IRUKA**!' _As opposed to: _'Oh, oh... _IRUKA_!') _Which one do you like better? I prefer the bold because the normal font can easily be less important in a bunch of text...

Also: Rodrigo feels the need to announce his feelings...; " I AM BRILLIANT! THEIR RELATIONSHIP IS COMING TOGETHER PERFECTLY! ! ! MUAHAHAHA-" *cuts video cam off*

I apologize for the horror you just witnessed.

And finally: cookies for all reviewers! *tosses them out*


	12. Ever Creeping Cold

**A/N:** HI GUYS! Sooo, I just went back and skimmed/read all of my past chapters… I am astounded I made such a hateful relationship into a deep friendship so effectively without it completely failing and sucking in a million ways. I personally hate stories that rush Kakashi and Iruka's relationship. I truly hope mine isn't like this… If it is I'm just going to add a lot more chapters and make it a like, 150,000 word story. However, the fact I'm already at a good fifty-thousand words is pretty impressive. Especially since though the care is evident, they haven't ventured into the realms of a relationship. So sorta' yay me… I feel their friendship is far too rushed though… Ah well, you guys like it! And I know it doesn't _completely_ suck, so that's awesome! I hope I wrote their friendship believably. O.o Did I?  
>ANYWAY! So, here is the absolutely fantastic chapter 12. (I hope.) Let us watch the story unfold! (Gosh I'm so nervous for this chapter...)<p>

**Important Notice:** School has started again… Meaning I'm not entirely sure if I'll be able to update Perplexed once-a-month like I have been. So I sincerely apologize for that, but know it shall never be abandoned!

**Warnings: **It is chapter twelve, these are entirely unnecessary and I will now fore-go these in the future. Well, I should but probably won't in fear of angry reviewers... Wait what? This is fanfiction. The fact you are on such a chapter and pretty much know what's going to happen should mean you are not going to get upset if it randomly ups-itself in rating. So… I think I shall and it's okay, to fore-go these!

**Disclaimer: **THESE, however, are quite necessary. I don't own Naruto, Kakashi, Iruka, hot man sex, or anything of that nature or relating to Naruto. It's quite a pity really, I mean look at what I've done with two characters already! Imagine if I had all of Naruto …*o* (Actually it'd barely be on book ten at this point if that was true… *fails at updates and hangs head in shame* v.v)

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The silver-haired jounin awoke with a start. Someone was in his bed, and he could feel the- skin? Touching him. Kakashi tried remembering who could have possibly earned the right to sleep in his bed, why they were there, and how the hell he even fell asleep in the circumstances. But then the past days caught up to his foggy mind and he remembered Iruka was staying with him. With that figured out, he relaxed a lot more and enjoyed the warmth he felt from the man. He knew he shouldn't have- but he did. Warmth always affected the copy-nin. It reminded him of good times, and generally just felt nice. It was a sign of life, and fended off the cold chill of the night, rain, death, and everything else the jounin hated. He liked the rain, but if it was the cold that quickly shifted his feelings to hate. He involuntarily shivered as he remembered some of the cold things in his life. The warmth coming from the chuunin however, was something he was not accustomed to. As he fully awoke he couldn't truly decide how he felt being back to back with his friend. Regardless, he finally yawned, and realized he also didn't have his mask on. That fact disturbed him. _'I'm getting too comfortable with you, Iruka. I can't keep doing things like this. Even if it feels normal...'_ Even he knew the current position he was in was highly questionable to anyone in Konoha. _'I'm just so comfortable like this though,'_ he thought as he relaxed happily in the bed, even slightly pushing against his bed mate, getting ever closer. He firmly hit a mental wall, however, as he realized he was almost _cuddling_. _'No. Just, no.'_ was all he could think. It didn't make much sense, but it set off the desired alarms. He quickly stopped "cuddling" in disgust, and distantly enjoyed the warmth, without feeling anything for the chuunin.

After a time passed with the jounin enjoying the warmth and simplicity of the moment, he finally sighed as he mournfully got out of bed. As his back was exposed he felt a keen shiver, followed by the remaining warmth of his chuunin. _'Wait. Stop. Right there. 'my'? That's just wrong… you in no way have __**any**__ claim on Iruka, and that's that.' _Disturbed by his mind's passive thoughts, he elected to metaphorically strangle them, lock them in a cage, crush said cage with Earth jutsu, then finally leave it to be forgotten. He was extremely good at ignoring things in his head. He slid on his mask and glanced at the clock seeing it was 9:00am. His eyes widened as he realized Iruka should have awoken three hours ago. He immediately turned around, and as he was about to shake Iruka awake, stopped dead upon seeing the man's tan back. A very long diagonal scar made its mark from just underneath the chuunin's shoulder all the way down to the middle of the chuunin's back, and stopping just shy of the spine. Kakashi's eyes widened as he realized a Windmill Shuriken almost paralyzed Iruka, and an old bloody Windmill Shuriken was hanging in Iruka's room. Suddenly, based on his old observations when he first ate Ichiraku with the tanned man he remembered Iruka put less pressure on his upper back and sat down more hunched over the entire time. Now he knew why: the old wound left a permanent, almost unnoticeable injury. Upon looking at the scar closer he found it was only about a year- maybe a year-and-a-half old. For some reason he felt the urge to trace the scar. He knew it wasn't normal and only could sigh, _'Why do I feel like doing things like this with, and even to you?'_ he knew without thinking however, that it was simply because he wanted to do what the chuunin does: care. That- and quite simply, he was curious. No other reason besides he was curious. He however found his mental struggle was quickly getting far more difficult and detestable. Because of his curiosity however, he succumbed to his desire. He put on his mask in case the other man woke, and gently traced the scar with one finger. He could feel the raised skin of a 'newer' scar and felt something inside him clench. _'You almost died. I would have never known you…'_ with that realization it became even clearer to the man why he promised to protect Iruka. He was protecting himself as well. _'Honestly, how you've penetrated these walls of mine… It's like I'm an entirely new person. You're making me more human each day. Perhaps I can forget this demon someday.'_ The man's mind drifted off then, remembering all the hateful looks people gave him when he was younger, the darkness of every single mission, the lack of care for his well-being, everything. He found he was starting to shake and firmly shook his head.

Much to his surprise though, he felt the man stir, his finger was still lightly on the scar as well. _'Can't hide it now…'_ He pulled his hand away only when the chuunin looked at him from under tired eyes. "I got that from my old friend. Well- perhaps 'friend' isn't the right term… Honestly I can't figure out what to call him. He was a friend, lover, backstabber –literally—, and just, I have no clue." Kakashi could only raise his eyebrow in response. A story was the last thing he expected from the man. He actually expected a harsh reprimand and threat. The man sighed and finally turned to lie on his back, staring at the roof of his void apartment. "He was too many things for me that I can't figure out. However, a more prominent thing he always was to me, was a stress-inducer. Everything he did, absolutely everything, troubled me more. Why he brushed me off, why he was unhappy I didn't pass Naruto, why he hurt me so deeply, why he betrayed me, and even how he is doing in prison right now."

The jounin felt a great sympathy for his friend, he knew just from that one story Mizuki was one of the biggest parts of his life, and greatest influences. It also saddened him to a point, as to how someone could use hi- _the_ chuunin. He also saw the moment Iruka realized chaos and impending doom were amiss. The man's entire body stiffened, his eyes widened, and he slowly- ever so slowly, looked at the clock. "Kakashi… Please, _PLEASE_ tell me your clock is three hours and five minutes ahead."

Kakashi could only display his trademark smile, "It is three hours and five minutes ahead."

Iruka then threw the sheets off his frame, and promptly entered Kakashi's bathroom at alarming speed. To which the jounin just stared with both a very amused look and a thought in his head, _'Damn, emotions really do help you Iruka…'_ He really had no clue what he could do at the moment, but also realized he narrowly escaped being forced to explain himself to the chuunin, which he was only too happy for. _'Hmm, I wonder what happens at the academy to make you act like this?...'_ as he thought this he saw Iruka open the bathroom door, fully clothed in his uniform already and madly tending to his other hygienical needs. Kakashi could only watch transfixed at the speed in which the chuunin got ready. He looked at the clock and saw it was only 9:10am. "Maaa, Iruka, did you take a two second shower?"

The man only glared, "Yes. Add one-hundred-eighteen seconds to that."

Kakashi only laughed sheepishly as he watched the man, "hope you can make it in time Iruka."

The chuunin pinched the bridge of his nose in what Kakashi saw as an attempt to hold in anger, he realized he probably should stop teasing him so much. "Kakashi, I'm three hours and twelve minutes late, I'll be lucky if the academy isn't burned down yet. So sorry to leave so abruptly, but I. Have. To. Go." With that the man swiftly left, gathering all the things he could –and needed, of course- then running full-speed out of the apartment and to the academy. Kakashi widened his eyes as he realized that was probably at least jounin level speed. He couldn't help but smirk lightly in admiration of the young teacher.

'_Well, I guess I need to get ready now and then head to Ichiraku for Iruka…'_ with that in mind he slowly got up and walked into his bathroom to get ready for the day.

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'_Oh kami, what the hell is happening? First I sleep in his bed, then __**over**__-sleep in his bed only waking up when I felt my scar getting traced over, which is even worse because that was just… way too intimate.'_ The tanned man rubbed his forehead in great stress, unsure what Kakashi was doing, _'and to top __it__ all off I tell Kakashi something about one of the most significant events in my life…'_ the chuunin let out a long groan and realized he was standing at the academy door for a good five minutes. He quickly remembered why he was originally so panicked and burst into his room after making his way through the halls.

What he saw made him remember exactly why he couldn't leave his brats alone. Practice Shuriken and Kunai were strewn and buried into each wall, there were several spots of burned out fire, and strange stickiness and other childish things everywhere. His eye twitched, as he spotted twenty small pairs of eyes staring at him in worry. He decided he should use his full 120% Iruka anger to scare them out of their wits and hope it's enough to make them hesitant next time. He let his eyes twitch, smiled sadistically, and let loose his full anger.

"WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ALL ARE DOING?!" He hoped that to his students it looked like his head expanded to the size of his entire body and wind jutsu erupted from his mouth, because that's what he wanted. Much to his satisfaction everyone dropped everything and ran straight to their desks.

"Would someone care to _explain_ to me why weapons are in the wall, fires were started, and-" he looked around for what else he could add, and much to his lack of surprise, found a tied up Kotetsu, "why in the world a _teacher_ is tied up?" his eye twitched again as he hoped he wouldn't have to kill his students.

Shyly, an Inuzuka girl raised her hand. "Yes, Agar-chan?"

"B-because we misbehaved."

Iruka let his temper dim down considerably. "Yes you did. Naturally in the ninja world a punishment follows misconduct… so would someone please tell me why you misbehaved?..."

The girl spoke-up again, "Because we got bored."

Iruka sighed and shook his head as he knew that was the sad truth. "What do you believe is an appropriate punishment for this?" The brunet tried his best to treat his students like full-fledged shinobi, he knew it made them feel more adult and they appreciated it.

"Quiz day?" a voice chimed in.

"I think an early exam is better!"

"No, more homework!"

Soon his class started arguing with each other about the best punishment that they didn't entirely oppose, Iruka could only laugh softly as he knew they were very close to graduating. "Alright, alright, we're going to do a quiz in the form of review."

His class moaned in distaste, but he just laughed as he knew it could have been much worse, "Oh, and you are all going to clean the mess you made after that!"

He smiled in satisfaction as they all groaned in protest. "So, what is the best way to conserve chakra in a chase?"

His class answered in unison: "set-up explosive tags and traps as quickly and easily as you can to distract them, then use shadow clones to fight them off if it isn't working. The mix of distractions will allow you to slowly get ahead of them whilst using minimal chakra."

The teacher could only smile happily as he was finally getting through to them, -a quick glance around his class made him realize it was only barely though- but an improvement was an improvement. He continued testing his class (untying and letting Kotetsu go in the process), as the time passed easily. Soon he realized it was a bit past the time he usually let them out, so after they answered his final question he dismissed them.

"Alright, go take a break. And remember Konohamaru-kun, I'll find you," he said threateningly.

The young boy laughed awkwardly and nodded. He watched as his class filed out for the lunch break and finally sat down in his chair heavily. He realized he had nothing to eat and could only groan sadly as he let his forehead hit his desk.

"You look like crap," the chuunin heard from his class window.

The chuunin could only laugh as he looked up to see a fully clothed and ready for the day Kakashi. "Hello Kakashi," he said with a tired smile.

"Yo!" the man said cheerily.

Iruka let out a long-suffering sigh but attempted to keep his smile up, "Yeah, I feel like it."

The jounin frowned unhappily as he set the Ichiraku bag down on the teacher's desk, "Didn't sleep well then?" he said with a sullen look.

The teacher took the bag very gratefully and quickly fished out his food, "I actually slept better than I usually do. I just didn't sleep long enough."

Kakashi bit his response that he went several days without sleep often and instead substituted an, "Oh. I see."

Iruka smiled tiredly again as he broke his chopsticks, saying the common 'thanks' and dug in. Kakashi watched the man as he ate, trying to figure him out even if he could just ask the teacher. _'Why would you stand up to jounin without fear?'_ He sighed to himself as the man ate, thinking about how he always ordered the jounin around in the mission room, demanded reports to be correctly done, not backing down when a jounin talked –or yelled— at him. He couldn't figure it out.

"Thank you very much for this Kakashi. It actually means a lot you helped me so much. It's sorta' my fault for sleeping in," he laughed to himself deprecatingly.

"You're welcome. And, ah- so why were you so erm- fast? This morning?"

"Kakashi, you don't look at your surroundings often when in the village, do you?"

Kakashi in turn only raised a brow as he shook his head, but took the hint and looked around. To his surprise he saw the chaotic state of the room. His mind added that paying attention to scenery would actually lower his guard as opposed to being aware of himself and his book.

"Iruka, how do you live through the academy work every day?"

The chuunin smiled mischievously, "You get it now?"

The jounin raised his brow in confusion, but realized Iruka meant this was exactly why he was so well-conditioned for a chuunin.

"Ah… yeah, I think so 'Ruka."

The brunette only raised an eyebrow and shrugged off the pet name- this time. That did remind him however, "Kakashi? Why were you tracing my scar this morning," the chuunin asked slowly wondering if he should have even broached the subject.

The jounin in turn stiffened and looked away trying not to let his emotion show, "I just… I don't know. Can we not talk about this?" he asked in reply, not wanting to think about it.

"I want to know."

Kakashi's hands clenched on their own, _'You gotta' try and answer him. He deserves at least that from everything you've done.'_ "I guess it just," he paused trying to find the right words, "interested me. I wanted to see how it would feel, I suppose." He managed after a long pause. He couldn't look at the chuunin and favored staring at a charred spot on the floor.

Iruka in turn only stared at the man, trying to figure out a way to react properly. "Y-you, haven't had much physical contact have you?" as soon as he said it had to keep himself from bashing his head in the wall as he remembered the man barely hugged him, and the first time he did stiffened entirely, as it was unwelcome.

The masked man only shook his head in reply.

"I see…" was all the scarred chuunin managed as he finished eating his food. He decided to leave it at that. "Ah, Kakashi, how'd you sleep?"

"Eh. As well as usual…"

"Oh."

"I'm hungry…"

"Why didn't you get anything then?" the tanned man replied with a slight laugh.

"I did."

Iruka widened his eyes as he realized he was keeping the man from eating, "oh. Well just eat now then. I'll busy myself with grading. Say, you didn't get the stack of papers I had on the table for today, did you?"

Kakashi widened his eyes in panic, "No."

"Oh. It's fine. I can really get those back to the kids whenever, so I'll just do so tomorrow. Wait a second…"

The masked man in turn let out a quiet sigh of relief.

The academy teacher then realized they were also in a quite public place. A window, and school filled with teachers was just inviting Kakashi to be seen. With that he closed the window's blinds so that it was more secluded.

"So that's why you weren't eating… well, you're free to now Kakashi."

The man only smiled cheerily through his mask. "Alright," he said as he sat away from Iruka –on his desk of course—, sliding his mask down and eating the take-out he got from Teuchi. He heard Iruka idly marking papers.

"You always grade? It seems like it."

"Yeah."

"Ah…"

Soon the jounin finished after a comfortable and extended silence, slid his mask back on, and turned towards the teacher.

"Well, I think it's time for the kids to be back, so I'll let myself out now. Thank you Iruka."

"See ya' soon Kakashi," the tan man replied with a smile and small wave.

Kakashi happily returned it as he poofed away.

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The silver-haired man arrived in his apartment again, still bored. However he let a smile grace his features as he realized Iruka didn't seem too upset at his accidental curiosity this morning. Unfortunately, upon sitting on his couch he realized he was still plagued by an annoying problem: there was still nothing to do. He let out a groan as he stared at his featureless white ceiling. His life was so cold and featureless like that ceiling. He felt it complimented him in a twisted sort-of way. The man's eyes widened as he realized he really shouldn't stay in his apartment unless he was getting distracted- either by sleep, Iruka, or his ninken. _'I have to get out of this place… or at least make it tolerable somehow…'_

The man then started thinking about Iruka's apartment: why it felt so warm and nice compared to his. He knew the pictures helped, and the well-used kitchen and furniture, but besides that he really couldn't think of anything else. He frowned at that and decided he'd have to ask Iruka himself which he knew would be painful.

'_I'll train now, get my mind in a nice sort of trance…'_ with that decided he left his apartment and rushed quickly towards the training fields. He elected to take the rooftops to speed the process along, and soon arrived somewhat out of breath. The fact he was out of breath made him realize he had to lightly train, instead of his normal routine. The man then entered a sort of trance most jounin had, and easily began performing several taijutsu moves, throwing shuriken and kunai blindly, and also fighting for his life against invisible opponents. With his first training set done he then moved on to summon a shadow clone and trained against himself. It wasn't optimal, but for the situation and his current state, was good enough. He also avoided blows of great strength as that would cause him far more pain than necessary. He continued training with ease for an extended period of time, when he was finally out of breath he broke his trance and breathed slowly and deeply, sweating profusely.

The jounin smiled as he felt more relaxed and generally better, then saw it was almost dark, which made him decide to quickly head home hoping to meet Iruka either on the way, when he got home, or very soon after he got home. _'My life is starting to revolve around you now Iruka, and that's more than just a little bad. I can't have that. I may not be in ANBU any longer, but I am still an elite jounin!'_ the thought annoyed him to no end as he realized he was still fighting against putting hi- _the_ chuunin in danger. _'What am I going to do? Not to mention I need to find __**something**__ to do so I don't start overwhelming Iruka with my constant presence…'_ the silver-haired man could only sigh in annoyance as he realized thinking was beginning to get too troublesome. With that fact known, he decided to simply stop thinking altogether and just relax and attempt to enjoy the chuunin's presence- if he showed.

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The jounin finally arrived in his apartment, unfortunately not seeing the chuunin at all, on the way or starting dinner- not that he expected to, but he did hope. He finally just sighed and maneuvered his way to the couch, not bothering to turn on the light to remind him of his loneliness. As he sat, his thoughts drifted to his first year in ANBU, the year he got his first mission to seduce and retrieve, the year he lost his virginity. The thought sickened him now, _'you lost it all to Konoha, Hatake. Quite pathetic. Are you __**that**__ blindly loyal? You lost your childhood, emotions, one of the greatest gifts to a lover, even your friends.' _The thoughts disturbed him, _'you need to stop being so negative.'_

"_But everything is true, isn't it?"_ his mind retorted, rebellingly. _"You've lost so much and gained sooo very little. Why do you think you're clinging to this useless academy teacher? You think you care about him? No, you only care about yourself."_

Kakashi shivered, usually his mind and inner Kakashi wasn't _this_ cruel… _'You aren't useless, Iruka. You care about me. You've saved me, even.'_

"_Pathetic. Stop trying to comfort yourself in the face of so-"_ his cruel mind stopped briefly, finding the right word,_ "little. Nothing."_

Kakashi shook his head and barred his thoughts, or at least the inner Kakashi. He was getting very cold again, like his apartment, the bodies of so many slain, the icy fear of death. Kakashi didn't fear death itself, no, he just was afraid of how it could happen at any moment, the second he let his guard down. He rubbed his arms in a futile attempt to warm himself. The cold always made him feel so weak, it made him feel sick and angered him at the same time. He always felt so bitter. The cold was probably one of the worst things Kakashi always dealt with. The man was now shivering violently; he blindly went into his room and pulled off the blanket, wrapping himself in it. That felt somewhat better, but he was still shivering as he returned to the couch. As the man sat and continued shaking, he saw the light turn on, temporarily blinding him, then smiled to himself as he saw Iruka.

Iruka knew something was wrong the second he saw Kakashi in his blanket. "Kakashi? Are you okay?"

The jounin smiled in reply, "Yeah. I'm just a bit cold Iruka."

Iruka wasn't convinced. "Jounin can handle the cold for an extended period of time."

"Doesn't mean we like it."

Iruka frowned, noticing the slight tremors Kakashi had- heavily suppressed by the ninja, though. "You're shaking Kakashi."

"I'm fine, Iruka," the Sharingan user said, though Iruka could tell it was with force and the stubborn jounin was no longer smiling.

'_I should probably back off, but I'm worried now. Jounin rarely shake.'_ Iruka in turn let his eyes narrow a bit, intending to handle Kakashi like he would a pre-genin. "No you're not, what's wrong?"

"I told you, nothing." This time Iruka could feel the bite of his words.

"Never stop lying, do you?" the chuunin replied with a slightly twisted smirk. "Jounin only shake for three reasons: a break down, chakra depletion, and being sick. You're getting upset, -and I apologize for invading your privacy- therefore you are likely breaking down. However little."

The jounin bit his lip until it hurt, he didn't want to yell at the teacher, but he was getting so angry. He finally settled on looking away and staring at the ceiling. _'Didn't you say you'd open up to him? Now's the perfect time, Kakashi.'_ He didn't want too though. He wanted to keep his feelings locked up. Breakdowns simply were not good, but he was so cold…

"I hate the cold, Iruka," he managed after an extended silence.

"Why?"

"It reminds me of too much, and never seems to go away…" the jounin trailed off, but to him his voice sounded barely audible.

Iruka could barely hear, only because he dealt with his students for so long. His eyes softened as he recognized a tone of desperation in the jounin's words.

" Kakashi, it's alright. You haven't felt the cold in a while, what were you up too at those times?"

"I was with you," the man mumbled quietly again, seeming almost ashamed.

Iruka smiled sadly as he knew his friend was in pain. "Stop shivering, it's alarming."

Kakashi could only look back at the chuunin with a look in his eyes that the brunette knew meant something along the lines of 'I wish I could.'

Wordlessly, the chuunin sat on the couch and slid himself into the blanket with the man, "Better?"

The jounin nodded, though Iruka felt a few light shivers. He knew he'd probably regret it, but he silently took the man into his arms, letting his warmth help the copy-nin. As time passed, the jounin eventually relaxed into the crook of Iruka's neck, much to the teacher's surprise. Regardless he held the man. "Kakashi, it's alright. I can help," the brunette said.

"I've killed so many people, Iruka… I'm not worth it," Kakashi managed, wondering why his voice was so weak all of a sudden. He felt exposed, but not as cold with the chuunin there. _"You're being pathetic you know, you are so much stronger than this." 'But am I? Hiding my emotions sounds weak to me when they affect me so much.'_ The jounin managed a small smile as the annoying voice in his head didn't reply.

"Kakashi, you're a person, and you obviously have a lot of care inside of you. You deserve as much as the next shinobi. I've seen how kind you are, today and last night was a prime example. I'm thankful for the things you do for me. And remember your genin team? You did everything you could for them for their first year. I know you have a lot of care inside of you. Stop thinking of your past mistakes, what matters is how you treat others now."

Kakashi in turn could only sigh, not believing the kind man's words, but not disbelieving them either. As the time passed he found the warmth of Iruka was very pleasant, and he wasn't shivering anymore. He even felt a little sleepy. He soon found himself pulled out of the pleasant feeling when Iruka stood up and got out of the blanket. "Um, Kakashi, I still have classes. Thanks for everything you did today, though: it means a lot. But you should probably get to bed now," the man said smiling pleasantly.

"Maaa, alright. I trained today."

Iruka seemed a bit surprised, but said nothing otherwise.

"I'll see you tomorrow, alright?"

The masked man nodded idly and proceeded to his room, he felt considerably warmer, but found he actually somewhat missed Iruka's presence, and even warmth near him. As he fell asleep surprisingly easily, he thought of what the chuunin said: "You deserve as much as the next shinobi." He could only ask himself one thing, though, _'Do I?...'_

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**A/N: **TADA! More fluff for you! Not the best chapter, but it came out way better than expected. And I'm pleased to announce we need only 41 more reviews! I didn't actually expect this much. Thank you so much guys! :,) Hope you guys are liking, or even loving! This story! Also, I am sorry for the relatively short length, -compared to a few chapters- but I really couldn't think of much more to add. Thanks for sticking with it. =D I'll try my best to keep up to my once-a-month updating. This story is now being written chapter by chapter. : / I haven't planned it out any further. Maybe if I did I could get the chapters out much faster…? Hmmm…

Rodrigo: *hands out cookies to reviewers* I love it when people like my story.

Lover: *glares at the bunny, saying nothing*

_To my guest reviewer: thank you very much! Hope you enjoyed this chapter too. =)_


	13. Anxious

**A/N: ***peeks head out looking for possible lasers from snipers* Um… hi guys… I am so sorry this took so long…. I just got swept away by… everything. Projects, school, pursuing of crushes… It's been crazy. But I'm here! Finally! Writing! Please forgive me if this chapter isn't up to your standards… It's been a while. Dx I am SO SORRY for my semi-hiatus. : / I CAN say I will never let THIS long of a wait happen again. Please forgive me… *UBER sad chibi teary face*

**Disclaimer: **I. Don't. Own. Naruto. *cries self to sleep*

**Warnings: **The same. :P

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There was a soft tap at his window. His academy window, that is. Iruka sighed to himself as he knew exactly who was tapping at his window during his lunch break.

"Kakashi-" the chuunin let out a tired sigh, "come-in please."

He noticed the silver-haired jounin had been coming to his class a lot more often over the days, and though it wasn't unwelcome, it grew grating on one's nerves when a _jounin_ sat outside the window during all of class _staring_ at you.

"Maaa, Iruka-sensei- you don't seem happy to see me at all." The jounin allowed a small leer to grace his features, it was just so easy to mess with the school teacher. Iruka, naturally, noticed the sexual implication and turned a bright shade of red.

"Kakashi! You just won't stop, will you?!" the chuunin rubbed his forehead in annoyance, letting out an aggravated sigh.

Kakashi, in turn, only scratched the back of his neck chuckling softly while smiling his trademark smile. A comfortable silence stretched out between them, in which Kakashi continued thinking to himself about something that's been pressing on his mind lately.

"Maaa', Iruka?" He found he was beginning to blush, but held his ground and steady voice.

"Yeah?"

"You know, I am only experiencing all these feelings recently," the jounin paused, losing some of his confidence as he stared at the ground, hands in pockets.

Iruka immediately straightened up, alerted by the implications.

"Ah- yeah…"

"I've been hiding for a long time. I don't really know how to explain this- it's just… hard to be your friend."

Iruka's eyes immediately narrowed as he knew Kakashi was getting extremely close to cutting the friendship- but he let the man continue, to explain himself.

"It's hard to open up. It's hard to do anything around you. But the thing is, I don't ever want to stop being around you. You make everything so much more-" the masked man paused again, looking for the right word, feelings, Iruka stirred inside of him.

"Pleasant. What's it mean, Iruka? I've learned enough to know this friendship has passed the 'typical' phase. I don't want to be lied to. I can't promise I won't run away, but please tell me why I feel like this…"

Kakashi sighed to himself as his single eye trailed every microscopic curve of the grains in the wooden floor. He'd been thinking about this a lot lately, and finally- today, it just seemed like he could ask. Like he had the ability to do so, and like the academy teacher would be able to answer. Nervous, the perspiration from his body started causing his shirt to stick to his frame. He wondered briefly if this feeling was because of what happened last night, but he simply watched the tanned man waiting for an answer.

Iruka, however, was currently dealing with a mental whiplash. It all happened so fast- the questioning, the feelings he was experiencing himself, the thoughts and answers he could give Kakashi… He was right. This wasn't normal. He always was with the older man, and a few of the academy teachers even bugged him asking if he was dating the copy-nin. And that, combined with what happed last night…

He had no idea how to feel anymore.

"Kakashi, I, ah… I just- need to gather my thoughts to answer you. Could you wait for a bit?" the chuunin shyly asked the man.

Kakashi frowned, but figured he could probably wait. He was feeling very antsy though, a feeling he was _very_ un-accustomed to. The answers he came up with himself were short, few, but most probable to him. He didn't know what the true answer was until Iruka told him, though. After all, he had no actual experience in this field. What he did come up with by now, was that Iruka and himself were actually just a special case of 'friends', and he was okay with that. He, however, was not okay with the answer Iruka supplied him.

'_Kakashi has a point… We always spend a large amount of time together, -much more than I have with anyone else except maybe Naruto- and the awkward moments we've had… Clearly one of us likes the other's body… likely me. I have an intense care for Kakashi, and I started feeling this way extremely quickly…'_

"Kakashi, I- You're right. Now that you mention it, this friendship is not typical… We've been going out to eat, or going over to each other's apartments simply to spend time together, and while that's normal for friends. It's not normal to do that almost every day. I care about you a lot more than I thought I could care about anyone –in such a short time, that is– and that's kind of alarming for myself, so it is easy to imagine why you are concerned about this… Kakashi I- I think we like each other. Like- lovers, would…" he said slowly at the end, and more than a little reluctantly. He looked into the masked man's single eye, trying to decipher anything he could in them. He wanted to know how Kakashi would take this. He was warned by the man, after all. He saw surprise and confusion in the man's eye, but it quickly became cold and indecipherable. Iruka let out a shaky breath, worried how the next minute would turn out.

'_W-what? But I don't… I'm not gay. I don't think I'm bi either… But I know this friendship is odd. But I never thought that… this could happen.'_ Kakashi let his thoughts trail off, then remembering where he was, sealed off his feelings. It was too confusing right now. It was not what Kakashi had hoped for, either.

"I see," the masked man said, letting his only words in a long time hang in the air. The chuunin was bugged as that is all the shinobi had said. "I see" doesn't give him any clue as to what Kakashi thought.

Soon, students began streaming back in Iruka's class, much to the chuunin's surprise. He forgot he was on a lunch break, and so getting back to business, he looked towards the masked man's direction, but found only emptiness and a leaf on the floor of his class. He sighed to himself, but then leaned against his chair, rubbing his forehead as he watched the children walk in. They could tell he was not in the best mood already.

"Iruka-sensei! Why do you look so sad?" one of the braver students asked.

Iruka only smiled gently at the child, forcing the expression, "nothing at all, don't worry about me! Alright class, we are going to continue our lesson now!" Iruka forced his enthusiasm out, and pretended to guide the students happily. In reality he wasn't feeling too great, "I see" doesn't really tell him how Kakashi feels about everything. The brunette sighed quietly to himself while the students were diligently working, and he knew then he messed up as a few of the wiser students noticed, and fixed him with an accusatory gaze. He merely gestured for them to continue working, not bothering to hide his sadness from them.

"_I see?" "I see?!" Couldn't he have just given me a clearer sign? 'I see' helps no one! Not me, or him! God damn it… What am I supposed to do now? What did we last plan? Does he still want to even talk to me?'_ The chuunin let his thoughts trail off. He wasn't sure what to do anymore, and going home, then falling asleep sounded pretty good right now. He let out another sigh as he rubbed his forehead, sensing the impending migraine that he knew would deliver so much pain that he was convinced it would want him dead. He definitely thought a nap was a good idea.

The students finished as soon as the academy's bell rang, which, to him, was heaven promising release from life's stresses for a bit. He smiled at the last student telling him goodbye, then began to pick up his class room. There was not much he could actually do besides just throw away stray papers and the like. However while he was picking up he felt eyes on him again, but he pretended not to notice. He knew several ninjas had the ability to notice when a chuunin has also noticed their presence. So with that, he left his class intending to sleep for a while when he got home, which was lucky as today was one of the few days he didn't have to work the Missions Desk.

'_Wasn't today a holiday for the diligent workers? I would think so…' _Iruka chuckled to himself, as he knew he was probably one of the few that got it off. Everyone seemed to goof off in there. But he sighed in relief when he finally got home.

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The silver-haired man sighed to himself as he watched the teacher leave his class from his perch on the tree right outside of Iruka's classroom. He didn't know why he came back, or even what to think in general. As he was honest with himself, he knew he was avoiding thinking in general, but he had to soon. There was no alternative for him. Iruka was easily his best friend, and not knowing how to feel about his _revelation_ today when he knew the man would ask was not an option.

Kakashi groaned to himself as he combed a hand through his hair. _'I hate emotions… They're so… troublesome!'_

The masked man then came up with an idea. He wanted to go visit the man still, dinner with him was always good. And being with the tanned man was far better than anything his lonely, poor excuse of a home could offer. _'Would Iruka be fine with seeing me so soon? Hm… I guess I'll visit him around dinner time then, rather than right now.'_ He saw how tired the chuunin was. He had a bad feeling it was his fault, as well.

His mind by now was screaming at him to think about how he felt about Iruka and himself being more than friends, or even liking each other more than friends. However, the stubborn man the copy-nin was, he simply ignored that. He couldn't stop the twist in his stomach he felt though, as he thought about what it all could mean. He growled to himself, stopping the attempted thoughts immediately. _'Not only do I not want to do this, I simply __**can't**__.'_

He sighed to himself again, resolving to put up a metal wall around that particular subject and electing to go train by himself. He hopped off the tree, and then casually made his way towards the Training Fields, avoiding as many people as he could while going through the village. He felt an ever-increasing need to be alone as he weaved easily through the crowds. He finally reached the edge of the village and jumped into the trees intending to take the 'ninja highway' to the fields. As he bounded from tree to tree he couldn't help but remember the times he took this way, expecting to find his three students ready to yell "you're late!" at the top of their lungs. He sighed sadly, knowing those times were far gone. He did however know that Sakura, Naruto, and –though loathe to admit it– Sasuke had good teachers. He shuddered at what Orochimaru was teaching the Uchiha, though.

'_Obito, what would you do in my position?'_ the masked man wondered somberly. He however already knew his friend would not give up. Knowing that, he knew his mind was secretly pondering what Iruka had told him this afternoon. He mentally sighed, knowing he did not want to think about that yet, no matter how much it was beginning to nag on his mind. Training seemed like a better and better idea with the passing minutes.

Finally, he arrived in the fields and landed easily in the center of it. Upon examining his surroundings he saw it was the field geared towards water jutsu and sparring. Both of which were perfect for the copy-nin. He was extremely pleased his instincts lead him to the least used training field, as water users were not often found in the land of fire. He breathed a sigh of relief as he stripped off his vest and shirt underneath freeing his skin to drink in the crisp air of the forest. He naturally kept his mask on, and then summoned two clones to train with. He engaged in heavy sparring against two of himself, intending to work on his ability to fend off two highly-skilled opponents without ease of jutsu access. He smirked at his ability to create handicaps and reveled in the almost systematic fighting. It was relaxing to say the least, and he worked up a hard sweat.

When the jounin finally noticed his heavy breathing he decided to stop for a break. He rarely worked himself so hard without a lot of time passing. Looking at the sky, he indeed found the sun was setting. He smiled secretly to himself, still breathing hard, sweat dripping off of his body. The copy-nin settled himself against a tree just past the river, dismissed his clones, and watched the sun set. He never told anyone, but he loved watching the colors of the sky change. The hues of purple, yellow, and red were never the same as evidenced by the images his Sharingan has copied. He reveled in the small changes, but all of them created a beautiful sky. Often, these images of Konoha's sky were what kept him going when nothing else would. Lately though, so has the chuunin's smile. The masked man groaned to himself as he knew that just started his inner reflection on Iruka. He was avoiding it so well too. With a long sigh, he forced himself to relax against the tree, and finally let loose the thoughts he'd been avoiding all day.

'"_I think we like each other."' _The jounin groaned again. He had no idea where to start. Perhaps just re-living their moments. So the jounin closed his eyes, and did just that. _The chuunin's hateful glare, the warmth of the man's tan body, the warmth he felt for his students, the kindness he showed Kakashi after they became friends, how the man took care of him far better than a hospital could, knowing that because of Iruka he fought harder to come back to the village, to see his smile again, knowing that he was the reason his apartment became so lonely- dark… _

The jounin opened his eyes again, seeing the last of the sunset fade from the sky, and he knew he just entered that time when it is extremely dark because neither the sun nor moon was up. He sighed as he couldn't really see much of anything.But his thoughts returned to the school teacher quickly. He simply thought of Iruka smiling that shy smile of his, scratching the scar on his nose, and laughing. Kakashi sighed deeply, as he now knew that Iruka was right- they did like each other. They had to. Iruka saw him without his mask –though they both tried their best to forget that–, they've had far more intimate moments than normal friends ever have, and Kakashi knew he appreciated the chuunin's extremely toned body more than he'd care to admit.

There was only one problem, he never liked a guy before. He was certain he would never like a guy more than just passing approval of one's body. But with Iruka, he actually _liked _the man. His smile was the most notable thing that the jounin saw. It was what kept him fighting to get home in time, despite being late to everything else. Kakashi couldn't figure it out. He never liked a guy before. He was straight! But now, the chuunin had him questioning that more than he would have thought. It unfortunately lead to the man remembering his first mission in ANBU. He was forced to remember what it felt like for that man to- he closed his eyes tight in pain, shutting out the memory. Seduce and retrieve… the silver-haired man punched the tree he was leaning on in fury. He didn't want to remember that, and knowing that it was all he had to compare to what he felt for the chuunin sickened him.

The ex-ANBU was finished with thinking about this problem for now. He got up, used what little moonlight was now in the sky to find his shirt and vest, put them on, and began his trek to the village. He found that his mind was now often wondering to how warm the teacher was, and how his hard body would feel to touch. He only had from his memory, what the scar on the teacher's back felt like, and now he wanted to know how it would be to feel more of the man's skin. These thoughts left an anxious feeling inside the copy-nin as he finally arrived at the gates of Konoha. The patrols signaled to let him in, and upon looking at the sky again he found the moon was quite high already. If he was to show up for dinner with Iruka it would have been at least an hour ago. But, for some reason, he had a feeling the academy teacher did not want to eat with him tonight, and though the thought hurt, he really had no energy left to deal with any talking Iruka would surely force on him either. He only noticed now, his fatigue, and realized he might have slightly over-done it on training today. He chuckled quietly to himself as he opened the door to his cold apartment, quickly turning on the light. He always seemed to over-do it. One day it would get him killed.

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Iruka was furious. (He pretended to not notice people taking a wide berth of him as he walked through Konoha's streets.) But not just 'semi-angry, I can deal with the day furious'. No, he was '_I will burn your children alive and laugh over their charred bodies_ furious'. Why? The infamous copy-ninja was avoiding him. Again. After he said 'I see'. Iruka's eye twitched involuntarily as he saw the silver head of hair again in the crowded streets of Konoha, and it quickly disappearing when he looked for it again.

'_Honestly, I should have expected this. This damn jounin always avoids problems! This is by far worse than that time he had a month late mission report to turn in! I swear to Kami when I get my hands on him he will beg for forgiveness! BEG.'_ Finally arriving in the mission's room, those rather cold and heartless threats continued in his mind for several hours as he worked the desk. The only thing good thing he noticed about being so furious was that the commotion in the mission room died down considerably. Which it well should, as anyone crossing his authority in the mission room should expect a swift, _painful_ death. The academy teacher continued grumbling to himself in his mind for an extended period of time, ignoring the quiet chatter among the mission room's staff. He thought he did hear Genma say something about a week, and then looked shiftily towards the chuunin.

Hearing that small bit enraged him again as Kakashi had the gall to avoid him for an entire week already! The man should learn by now to freakin' deal with his damn problems like an adult would! But no, the inconsiderate sad excuse of an adult he was, he ignores the problem! _'IGNORING THINGS ONLY MAKES IT WORSE!'_ the man thought in fury, eye twitching dangerously.

The next report he got, he stamped and filed extremely roughly, and continued this trend until watching the ninja give him said reports high-tail it out of the mission's room grew boring, and less satisfying. The chuunin finally relaxed in his chair, fury subsiding to a dull throb of anger. Upon examining the rest of his coworkers he chuckled silently as he saw all of them looking at him with extreme wariness. Finally deciding to call them out, he asked no one in particular: "May I help you?"

The effect was immediate. Everyone in the mission room simultaneously made themselves look busy and said nothing. He laughed to himself and continued relaxing in his seat, looking at the doors and waiting for someone to come in. Glancing outside he saw it was rather dark, likely around 7p.m. When he returned his gaze to the doors, his entire body stiffened as he saw Kakashi. _'Finally ready, eh?'_ They held each other's gaze as the masked ninja walked into the mission's room, millions of questions on both of their minds.

"Kakashi-san."

"Iruka-kun."

The chuunin folded his hands underneath his chin. He saw Kakashi wince just barely, knowing he never would have been able to tell if he wasn't paying such close attention to the man.

"We should go somewhere to chat later," Iruka said, mentally twitching at how similar it sounded to 'we need to talk'. Kakashi only nodded his head slightly, then turned and left. Genma and Raidou exchanged an 'what was that?' look, while Iruka attempted not to count the minutes until his shift ended. He doubted the jounin would wait for him to get off of desk duty, but he was hoping he would do just that so he could simply walk and talk with the infuriating man.

'_Gah! Who am I kidding? Kakashi has avoided me for a full week, you really believe he'll be waiting out there for you? Hm… I should probably check the memorial stone first. Then his apartment, and then-?' _

"Iruka-san, you've been staring at that clock for a while now. You realize you can leave now, right?" Kotetsu said, with a teasing smile.

Iruka flustered, only now realizing he was doing just that. "A-ah. Right. Um. Bye!" and with that, the chuunin quickly packed up and fled the Missions Room, pushing his way through the wide glass doors he saw Kakashi and his ever-present book. The sight of the man surprised Iruka. He didn't expect Kakashi to actually wait for him. He let his previous anger die down as he knew the man was ready to face this talk. He really had no clue how it'd end either. All he knew was that he didn't want to lose the eccentric jounin.

"Hey, Iruka." The jounin said while closing his Icha Icha.

"Hey." The academy teacher said in response, with a tinge of disbelief that the man hadn't vanished yet. He spoke up again, realizing the man was just staring at him, and they both knew what was too happen next.

"Ah, Kakashi, let's- go somewhere else to talk. How does my apartment sound?"

The jounin merely nodded his head and did a light shrug- which bothered Iruka, causing his anger to bubble up again. He was being too nonchalant and that was already a warning sign. In silence, they walked together. It felt almost natural, but they both could feel the invisible barrier that was between them. Kakashi used his Icha Icha to cover the fact he kept sneaking looks at the young teacher. He seemed very tired, and distracted. That observation darkened Kakashi's mood, but he knew he couldn't back out now, and a week was already enough. What could he say? What could he do? Even the genius did not know these answers. And knowing he did not know any of the answers when he was usually prepared for any instance- it troubled him greatly.

Thankfully the cold night air was brought to an end by Iruka opening the door to his apartment and welcoming the copy-nin inside. Iruka let out a sigh, Kakashi put away his book and took off his shoes politely. Being back in the man's warm home had made Kakashi's dark mood lighten a little, as he allowed himself a thin smile before sauntering over to the couch. He noticed, with amusement, he had finally 'broken in' the couch from his many stays here as he read several of his books, waiting for Iruka to make dinner. Iruka quickly headed to the kitchen and started some Tea, then came back and awkwardly sat on the opposite end of the couch as he waited for their beverage to finish.

'_I really need that to calm down. My nerves are on end already and we haven't even started. Oh no… who's going to start the conversation?' _Iruka mentally face-palmed, as he knew that was a stupid question. It was obvious that he would. And that just made Iruka ever-more uncomfortable.

"Ah- Hi, Kakashi. Um… how have you been?"

"Maaa, okay." He replied with a shrug.

Iruka simply nodded his head in acknowledgement and realized that was his best attempt at small talk. Yep, this would be a trip to hell. He sat there, arm on the couch, head in his hand as he forced himself to relax. He settled with watching the jounin as the man seemed engrossed in his novel anyway.

"Why does it take you so long to read those Icha Icha anyway? I see you with the same volume every day, ceaselessly. Do you just re-read it?"

"Well, actually, Iruka. I don't. I just put the Icha Icha cover on normal novels and read those. Occasionally it really is Icha Icha, but most of the time it is a different book, that I happen to be reading," the masked man said with a slight smile before mentally worrying about himself as he realized what he said.

'_Wait, why did I just say that? It's not like he asked me to elaborate and I could have easily lied… It's just a pretty personal detail Iruka did not need to know…'_

With that surprised mental thought he closed his book and set it down.

Iruka thought to himself in the same surprise, _'why did that come so naturally to us? It was so painfully awkward just a moment ago! I don't really understand… But when it's natural- it's fun.'_

'_Alright, no truthful slips for the rest of the night! I need to keep my bloodied life to myself. He doesn't need to know that part of me…'_

"Why?"

"I'm sorry? Why what?"

"Why do you cover your novels with Icha Icha covers?"

"Well, ah-" he was cut off by the high-pitched whistle of the kettle and mentally breathed a sigh of relief. He just said to himself he wouldn't be so truthful anymore, so what was wrong? Maybe he really was ready to open up. Just maybe he could allow Iruka into his life fully.

The man's return with two steaming cups of Tea made him smile, and he thought he might just try with this chuunin. Maybe he could somehow manage it in his twisted mind. Iruka handed him one cup which Kakashi grabbed gratefully and immediately took a light sip through his mask. The flavor caused him to smile in appreciation.

"Chamomile?"

Iruka nodded quickly.

"Thank you."

Iruka raised a brow, but realized that was Kakashi's 'underneath the underneath' way of saying he was nervous too, and needed the relaxing tea. Iruka mildly wondered how he got to read the man so well, but found it only made him happy. It gave him a chance to know the man even better. It also gave him a tinge of hope –just a tinge– that he perhaps had a chance with the eccentric man. _'Do I even want to be more than friends with you?' _He briefly reflected on the man's secret smiles and sense of humor, and knew that he wanted to at least try.

"So, Kakashi. 'I see' doesn't tell me what I needed to know."

The man winced, knowing Iruka dived right into the problem.

"I know."

Iruka gave a warning look to the man, complete with an eye twitch.

"I know… I just wanted time to think."

"And? What'd you come up with?"

"I- we- really like each other?" the masked man said with a large amount of uncertainty.

"So it seems. Just friends, or more?"

"More…"

"Kakashi, what's wrong? Why do you sound so uncertain?"

"I'm not gay Iruka. I am not even bisexual I think... I've never been 'attracted' to a male, I just can appreciate their bodies. Or at least, that was how it was until we became closer. Until you piqued my interest, and confused me- made me wonder why you do what you do."

Iruka lightly blushed, but smiled brightly knowing this was the most honest Kakashi has been with him, except perhaps during his breakdown.

"I'm sorry for confusing you, Kakashi." The chuunin said with a light, teasing laugh. He made himself comfortable, swinging his legs up on the couch and looking intently at the man opposite him. He got the sense he was playing with a dangerous sort of insect. Calm, normal, but able to kill you at a moment's notice. In this case, it was Iruka's heart in strike range. That alarmed him, but he continued looking, hoping to find something in the masked man's single eye. Without realizing what he was doing until it was done, he pulled up Kakashi's headband so that he could see both eyes. They were focused intently on him, and Iruka smiled, being able to see both of the man's eyes.

"So you said we were almost dating without realizing it? How did we manage that? And what do we do about it?" The masked man asked quietly, glancing down towards his book, then back at the chuunin. He felt very tense, like a kunai could be thrown at his heart any moment.

"Well, we thought we were just really good friends, but clearly I knew something was wrong, as did you, when I mentioned it was going a bit fast for us two as friends. That's a simple mistake, though. What we do about it now, is up to each of us separately, as well as both of us. Do you want to date me despite never being with a guy before? Can you do that? Are you willing? Do you want to?"

Kakashi had to shake his head. Iruka just asked if he… would…

"I- I don't know, Iruka. I've never done anything like it before. I mean… I enjoy your company more than anyone else's, but I still feel like it's only as a friend."

Iruka leaned in closer to the jounin, "want to just try? It's exactly like dating a girl, minus the girl-ish parts." Iruka chuckled quietly to himself at that.

Kakashi had been with very few people, if any, and never a real relationship. He rubbed his forehead with both of his hands.

"I don't know if I can… what will it entail?"

"Kakashi, unfortunately dating is not like a mission- you don't have a certain objective all the time, it changes often, and you have to be very, very, very, adaptable. Unless you can accept that, I can't do anything else and we won't be more."

"Iruka- I-…" he kept thinking about his first ANBU mission. He couldn't relive any of that. That man's cruel intentions the entire time. The way he meant nothing to Kakashi except future payment and the safety of Konoha. _'But it's not a mission Kakashi! Stop thinking of it like it is!'_ with a sigh, he came to a decision.

"Iruka, I- want to try. But I want to go very slowly… Nothing can really change from how it is now. I just- I'll tell you eventually when I trust you enough, but for now, I want to try. You've made me happier than I have been in years, and I think I can somehow figure it all out."

To Kakashi's surprise, Iruka simply nodded and smiled.

"Alright. I'll do my best to keep you comfortable, Kakashi. As I know how difficult it must be for you to accept it all. I mean- you've never been 'attracted' to a guy before. By the way, have you ever been attracted to a girl?"

"A few times…"

Iruka 'hn'd' and then reached over and gave the silver-haired man a quick hug, much to his surprise. He smiled again and got up, taking both of their –now finished– tea cups. Upon Iruka's return, Kakashi spoke up.

"Is that it, then? Are we now somehow together?"

Iruka gave a soft smile again, and said, "only if you want the title."

"Not particularly…"

"Then no, we're just friends exploring new grounds. Honestly, it probably won't change much from how it was. I just want to get to know you better."

Kakashi sighed to himself. He couldn't believe how easily the conversation flowed, or how to feel about exploring this new territory, or Iruka's brutal honesty. It was all a bit overwhelming for the usually private jounin.

"Ah… I suppose I do, too. This just seems too simple. Is a talk all we really need to do?"

Iruka put on a thinking face, and then flashed another quick smile and nod.

Kakashi could only rub his forehead in disbelief. He _just_ started exploring this curious side of himself.

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**A/N: **HI GUYS! I'm FINALLY. FRACKING. FINISHED WITH THIS CHAPTER. I AM SO SORRY IT TOOK EIGHT GOD-DAMN MONTHS. I had all that shit to deal with, but now, now, it's finally calming down. I feel so guilty… I should just pump out millions of one-shots so you all have mercy upon me. I deserve to be hanged and burned. x-x

But thank you SO MUCH! For sticking to this story and to my horrible update rates! I will tell you, this chapter feels like it's off or something. I think I messed up during the all important conversation… I don't know. I need you all to tell me! Otherwise, MILLION thanks for reading and reviewing! Your guys' reviews actually inspired me to finally finish this crap chapter made almost entirely of writer's block. So again, thank you. I REALLY hope you liked it! 'Cuz I do, despite feeling it's off.


	14. IMPORTANT NOTICE!(Goodn' a lil bad news)

**Hello everyone, **I'm here to inform you about something super important in relation to this story!

BUT FIRST A BIT ABOUT ME AND WHY THIS IS A NOTICE CHAPTER THAT WILL BE DELETED WHEN THE REAL CH. 14 COMES OUT!

"What happened to you?! Where did you go?! WHY IS THIS STORY TAKING 2 YEARS TO UPDATE, LEGITIMATELY! IT WAS GETTING GOOD!"

My answer: Quite a huge bag of mixed things. Laptop broke, college began, I simply grew lazy with this story and I didn't ever really feel like updating it and/or wanting to update it, people died, graduations happened, just life.

I'm SO SINCERELY SORRY that this is taking so long but **_good news!_** I am here and happy to inform you all that I am not dead! My interest in this story full of potential has been rekindled, and I actually took the time to look through each and every chapter and am shocked to find that only the beginning sucked, but it did follow the original goal I had in mind for this story. And also please understand; **YOU CANNOT EXPECT CONSISTENT UPDATES AS MADE OBVIOUS IN THIS HIATUS. **I just simply can't keep to any schedule since this is indeed a lesser priority for me, but still a priority.

So the **BAD NEWS!** I intend to go back and fix the first few chapters. So far only 1-3 (and honestly number three felt pointless and like it could be deleted, so I KNEW it could be improved). **HOWEVER: I am going to attempt to edit earlier chapters so that your understanding of this story is not affected at all, if you have been here since the beginning so you don't have to re-read the entire ficlet, unless you want too. **But keep in mind this means that the story will continue to be updated very slowly unless my 8-13 aren't that bad at all.

Past edited chapters will have an "(updated!)" in the chapter titles when they have been updated, and finally chapter 14 will be uploaded I HOPE within one month from now. So the tenth of January. Now my final goal is to make this beautiful, self-enriching, amazing, story finish this coming year in 2015, mostly as a homage to the series finally ending. (I HAVE NOT SEEN THE ENDING, NO SPOILS PLEASE DX). If nothing else it will be a 'National Novel Writing Month' story I will finish in November, 'cuz truly this story deserves an ending no matter how painful it is for me to get to the end. You all faithful readers deserve it. I myself have experienced the pain of an good story being cancelled.

So with that, I can guarantee you that I WILL FINISH THIS STORY AND IT WILL BE BEAUTIFUL 'CUZ KAKASHI AND IRUKA DESERVE IT, AS WELL AS ALL OF YOU! :heart: :heart: :heart: :glomp:

Rodrigo essentially gave up on this story but now he'll push me to finish it. SO SORRY FOR THE FALSE HOPE CHAPTER. I LOVE ALL OF YOU! Progress is being made yet again as I fully storyboard and characterize 'my' Kakashi and Iruka in this chapter story.

Thank you everyone and have a beautiful day/night/what have you!

Important P.S: Any reviews on this chapter will not be counted towards the 100 review milestone, as this isn't _actually_ a chapter. Sooo we're having a like- 105 review milestone! Or something. Depends on if reviews are deleted when I delete the chapter or not. But please don't hesitate to respond through PM or review. I'll appreciate knowing y'all are still out there and as ready as I am. Again, my sincerest apologies and I hope that everything about Perplexed works out the way I need it too!


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